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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Am I losing my shit?

38 replies

iamlittlemissforgetful · 11/11/2017 21:26

Posting here for traffic
More of a 'am I losing my mind?' than 'am I being unreasonable?'
In the last 5 months I've had a lot of things happen to me. Some quite terrifying stuff. Finally it feels like things are calming down thanks to great support & being proactive.
Prior to that, have been a single parent for 4 years (with abusive ex who's always in the backround) and working in high pressure jobs while trying to keep everything together.
Over the last 6 months, I've noticed that I've become a bit forgetful. Forgetting basic words, forgetting details of what friends are up to, writing more lists, more dependant on my calendar & then things like leaving the fridge door open and going into the other room (lots!) always going upstairs to get something & not knowing what I went to get, getting words wrong and the other day getting someone's name wrong....not a friend but someone I've known for years!
I rarely get a break or a lie in (ex has DD once a month on average for one night) and I've been dealing with all the stress while trying to still be a good parent. Sleep deprived too.
Anyone else feeling similarly forgetful or vacant far too frequently? Does stress do this?
Should I get a memory assessment?
Help!

OP posts:
midsummabreak · 11/11/2017 21:29

Whats your diet like? Lots of vegies, protein and water? Are you getting enough essential vitamins, minerals, healthy fats?

FermezLaVache · 11/11/2017 21:30

I'm the same

Sleep-shit
Emotional wellbeing-in the toilet

Little wonder

Justbookedasummmerholiday · 11/11/2017 21:31

I have been similar and personally am putting it down to stress.

Trying to make some more me time, joined the gym, more lazy bath moments!
I work pt, have 6dc and life is extra busy lately.
Never crosed my mind it could be anything else tbh!!

AnathemaPulsifer · 11/11/2017 21:35

Lack of sleep is terrible for memory and health generally, lots in the news about it recently.

Rudgie47 · 11/11/2017 21:36

It will most likely be stress, dont be worrying about starting with dementia or anything like that as its really rare in younger people.

PurpleMinionMummy · 11/11/2017 21:36

I forget words all the time. I get them mixed up when trying to construct a sentence quite often too Blush

iamlittlemissforgetful · 11/11/2017 21:37

Midsumma
Diet good. Lots of veggies/water etx
I run a lot and train when I can
Always on the go. Always have a massive list. Little support but popular DD who goes on play dates a lot so get a bit of 'me time'
Feel embarrassed when I forget words. Hate it!

OP posts:
iamlittlemissforgetful · 11/11/2017 21:39

Thanks for the article Anathem
I'm going to bed! Wink

OP posts:
Want2beme · 11/11/2017 21:40

Same for me. I cannot believe how unforgetful I've become - really bad. I think mine's been caused by a lot of stress.

EatsFartsAndLeaves · 11/11/2017 21:42

Sleep deprivation alone can definitely do this. How much more sleep could you get if you absolutely prioritised it above everything else?

WashBasketsAreUs · 11/11/2017 21:48

Happened to me, makes you think something's going on, doesn't it? I went to the doctors, told her I was worried about it, could it be early dementia etc. When I explained about my life, single parent, jobs, kids, parents, ex etc she said it wasn't surprising, I was doing too much. Best advice she gave me was put myself first sometimes, drop the housework standards as no one's ever died of dust and don't worry! We've all been there.

iamlittlemissforgetful · 11/11/2017 21:48

Eats poss 8-9 hours but I'm always doing stuff in the eve until around 10
I live on a noisy street too
I crave peace & quiet & lie ins!

OP posts:
WashBasketsAreUs · 11/11/2017 21:50

Oh and now if I forget things, I'm old enough to put it down to my age! And I'm old enough to not care! X

becotide · 11/11/2017 21:55

Multivitamin complex and eat sardines on toast for breakfast

RumTiTum · 11/11/2017 21:56

How old are you Op? I'm like this, I have three Dcs, two jobs and am perimenopausal. I think I just have too much going on combined with perimenopause (I'm only 42), brain overload! Stress can most definitely cause memory problems. I have to do a lot of writing at work and frequently forget what I was writing half way through a sentence and just make up the end!

backstreetsback · 11/11/2017 21:58

Doctor here...paediatric doctor so haven't actually seen a patient over 18 for over 3 years.. your life sounds pretty hectic and I get the same kind of brain pause after a 14 hour shift running around a paediatric A&E. Lack of sleep as previously mentioned can also cause this. There are also a lot of other medical things than cause this. Vitamin D deficiency (seen really commonly in the UK thanks to our amazing amount of sunshine) can occasionally cause forgetfulness. Same with ferritin and iron but if your diet is good this is less likely. Try and take it easy, cut out as much of the crap as you can, try and get at least 8 hours sleep (although some people need more or need less) try this for a few weeks and if no improvement just get some basic blood tests done from the GP and see if there's anything that's low but definitely sound more like you have so much going on that your brain is just taking a little while to catch up which is perfectly normal!

sweetdreamsaremadeofbees · 11/11/2017 21:58

It will be stress.

My memory is atrocious when I'm under stress and I become very forgetful.

showergel1 · 11/11/2017 22:03

I am like this. Looked for something at work this week and completely forgot about the existence of the folder it was in for 3 days.
I went to the GP a few years ago but was completely dismissed, just down to a 'busy life'.
I have a stressful job but outside of it do nothing. I get lots of sleep however my diet could be better. I'm in my twenties.
So no advice for you OP but you are not alone.

TeachesOfPeaches · 11/11/2017 22:04

I've become the same OP. I've been under a great deal of stress. Someone asked me which novels I read at uni as part of my degree and I couldn't remember a single one Confused. Constantly forgetting words, names, what I'm doing, what I've done etc. Just trying to get more sleep and see if that helps.

RagingFemininist · 11/11/2017 22:11

Yep stress is a very big possibility.
But so is iron deficiency and a lot of thre things.

You need to go and see your GP to rule any physical causes tbh. Esp as if this is s9mwth8ng as simple as iron deficiency, you can get better quite easily.

KickAssAngel · 11/11/2017 22:12

Is this relatively new/sudden?

I felt like this for years and kept being told it was just my age/being a mum etc.

No.

Massively underactive thyroid & Vit D through the floor. It has taken years to get thyroid & Vit D consistently within normal range. I still find I have that blank brain feeling when tired/stressed, but now I'm 48 so it's to be expected a bit. But when I was really ill, and didn't know it, the lack of names, dates etc was quite frightening. Like searching in my brain and there was a void where knowledge should be.

Make sure you're being as healthy as possible, keep a diary, see a doctor if you think it's more than just being tired.

MakeItRain · 11/11/2017 22:16

That's so funny, I could have written your post! I've been panicking about my memory too. I stumble over words, forget names, of people and sometimes names of things, I lose things all the time.
I'm also a single parent (full time) with a stressful full time job, getting not enough sleep. I've started taking vitamins and will be working on getting more sleep. I think I'm approaching the menopause so I'm probably doomed memory-wise.
I'm trying not to worry but to see if living more healthily and as calmly as possible helps.

neveradullmoment99 · 11/11/2017 22:17

I do this. Sometimes it worries me. I think its stress. I have never been good with names so have quite frequently forgotten names - even although i have known the person for a while, so thats not a huge issue. You arent alone.

iamlittlemissforgetful · 11/11/2017 22:20

Thanks everyone
I feel less insane now... Sounds like getting more sleep is the key. I'm in bed now with my book.
Someone asked my age - I'm 39.

OP posts:
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