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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Socialising / newborn

16 replies

acornfed · 09/11/2017 01:40

I have a 6 week old son. My husband and I have been invited for dinner in at a friends house (relatively new friends ) with two other couples (1 couple are friends , 1 are people we've not met)
AIBU To think I can ask them if I can bring my newborn who is EBF?
Or AIBU to ask therefore putting them in an awkward position.
Newborns basically sleep..would try and ensure they aren't a "guest at the table" etc
Thank you - please be nice -I'm a new mum

OP posts:
HatingTheBigShow · 09/11/2017 01:47

I would think it's a given that you would be bringing your 6-week-old with you!

sonyaya · 09/11/2017 02:05

Congratulations!

Definitely ask the host. They can always say no, but presumably you won’t be able to attend without baby so you need to know whether they can go to or not.

It is obviously up to the hosts, but if it were me, I would have no problem at all having your baby along! At 6 weeks they are unlikely to cause much disruption and it would mean you could attend.

sonyaya · 09/11/2017 02:05

*too

Italiangreyhound · 09/11/2017 02:58

Ask the host. I would imagine they would know you were bringing your baby.

HashtagTired · 09/11/2017 03:15

I think it would be assumed that your dc would go with you? But I’d check with the host. It would be pretty shitty for them to say no.

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 09/11/2017 06:44

Point out your baby’s too young to be left but if they can accommodate him then you’d like to come. Otherwise maybe next time.

We were invited to a wedding without a 7 week old so I’d aaaume nothing.

Littlecaf · 09/11/2017 07:12

I’d ask but assume they might say no. Or others might not want the baby there either.

I was invited to a dinner party recently and DS was 3 weeks. On our group WhatsApp chat I jokingly said ‘thanks very much, but unless I bring DS, I can’t make it, perhaps in a few months’ The host (who has children) said ‘yes bring him, he’ll probably just sleep’ one of my other childless friends at the same time chipped in with ‘but I imagine bring him would be complicated, so best not’. Thanks.

CaeDyGeg · 09/11/2017 07:16

YANBU to ask the host if she minds but please be open the the fact that the host isn't BU to say no.

Hollyhop17 · 09/11/2017 07:16

I wouldn't go personally. With very close friends maybe, but socialising with people you dont really know with a new born I would find stressful and a bit awkward.

Mammyloveswine · 09/11/2017 17:22

Never assume... I got invited to a baby shower when my D'S was about 6 weeks. I said obviously I would have to bring him as I was EBF. I was told "of course". I then got a message saying as older children were not allowed neither was my new born and it was suggested my mum have him for a couple of hours... I didn't go. Honestly though just check with the host. I still can't believe my newborn baby was not allowed to attend a baby shower 🙈

PippleBang · 09/11/2017 17:24

Worth checking with your host but I wouldn't dream of inviting a new mum round for dinner and expecting her to not bring her baby. In fact I don't invite any parent friends round for dinner without expecting their kids along too - out for a meal might be different but i cant imagine not welcoming children into my home if im inviting their parents over!

Pengggwn · 09/11/2017 17:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ScoobyDoosTinklyLaugh · 09/11/2017 17:37

In my circle it'd be assumed that the invite included the baby.

acornfed · 10/11/2017 16:36

Thanks everyone. I asked, and was met with a resounding "of course bring him!" Feel pleased they didn't say "no" as I think it would have felt like a knock back as a brand new mother.

Looking forward to my first night out

OP posts:
NerrSnerr · 10/11/2017 16:42

That’s great, in my friendship group it’s expected babies will come too.

pitterpatterrain · 10/11/2017 16:44

Excellent! Yes I would have assumed you bring your baby, and also get generally fussed over!

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