Birthday Party Politics!

[allyouneedisloveandcoffee]

Hello MN people!
This is more of a 'what's the party invite protocol?' than AIBU....
Last year I sent out invites to DD's party & everyone got back within a couple of days.
Numbers have doubled this year but they got distributed a week ago & over half haven't replied yet...
I need numbers for the venue and if people can't come there's still time to invite others in their place as venue expensive!
I always reply when DD is invited within a couple of days tops....
I'm walking past parents at the school pick up & all they have to do is say yes or no....
Starting to feel a bit frustrated about it.
Is it cool to just ask or are they waiting for a better offer or what?

If you are walking past just ask them

Did you ask to rsvp and if so has the rsvp date gone yet?

I feel your pain! I sent out invites the other week for my son's birthday and still have about 5 who haven't bothered replying.

I put my number on for RSVP so they only need to send a quick text. I don't see them either so can't ask but it's really frustrating!

I honestly don't know why people do this, imo it's very rude!

What date did you give for rsvp?

No RSVP deadline given (is that a thing?)

Just a mobile number.... Next to the RSVP bit....

Lost invites. Put aside and then forgot to reply. Trouble at home or busy life and haven't emptied book bag yet.

Just ask them OP. I have forgotten before and really appreciated the nudge.

There you go then

Always say 'Please reply by XXXX' optionally adding
'as the venue need numbers'
or if you are hardcore
'no reply = no partybag

By giving a date, you are giving yourself the ability to chase after that date without feeling/appearing rude.'

No RSVP deadline given (is that a thing?)

😂

Is it a thing though?
For a kids party? Clearly!

I always chased up.

Yes, it is an essential thing.

Other things you need to know (as you sound like a very nice novice):

• people will drop and run if you want them to stay
• people will stay when you want them to drop and run
• people will bring siblings without asking
• people who bring siblings without asking may also expect them to join in the activities, share the tea, and be given a party bag

I always do online invitations, that way you can set it to do rsvp reminders automatically.

Teen times 😂

Pumpkinpie I totally agree!
It's so rude!
Although I do understand people are busy but the people who replied immediately are the ones who are single parents/possibly more busy than others.....

Having a similar issue myself- invites were given out before half term for a party next week, rsvp date for last Friday- need to pay for the party tomorrow
Had to re write 50% of the invites last week as they’d been lost, despite being given to parents in the first place and still haven’t heard from 3 of the 12 invited

Find it so so rude

I'm not that busy just disorganised. I put a invite on the side, it then gets a pile of stuff put on top of it and I find it after Christmas when I get a burst of energy!

I forgot my own birthday too!

Completely agree. Those who say they are busy, believe me everyone is busy. Just say yes or no. At least after reminders. Deep breath

Why wouldn’t you just ask them?

Argh, I used to hate people who don't RSVP, it is so so rude and when the venue needs numbers and you've no idea if some are coming or not,what are you supposed to do?!
Definitely ask in the playground when you see them. That's what I do.
It's worse when you've got a birthday in the middle of the summer holidays and you've no way of chasing them up - it was a guessing game half the time whether anyone would turn up or not!

No RSVP deadline given (is that a thing?)

You should always give a date, then when the date has passed you can chase. If you don’t give a date they might just think a text the day before is enough.

In 10 years of kids parties I've never had anyone who hasn't Rsvp

I organised a party for dd and I put Rsvp deadlines. I got 1 response but most people turned up. I was told its the norm now.

Lots of people told me they were too busy to reply and I couldn't get my head around that!

Just ask them iif you see them in the playground (even if you did give an RSVP date and it hasn't passed).

For what it's worth I've only had problems with RSVPs when I've had a big party (more than about 6 children). When it's been close personal friends, I've never had any trouble at all!