To demand to know where he spent the night last night?

[OhForFrigSake]

As far as I'm aware we hadn't fallen out, we were cuddling up watching TV. I made him his tea as usual.

Then we decided he wanted to go out at around 9.30. Unusual but not unheard of. Then there was absolutely no sign of him. I was worrying all night with all sorts going through my mind. I could barely sleep, turning all the events of the evening over in my mind and wondering if I'd done something that would make him go out and stay out all night. He's never done that before :-(

This morning at 8am he strolls in without a care in the world, jumps on my knee and starts purring like nothing happened!

AIBU to wonder where the hell he's been all night?

Ha! Ours even answered to another name . In fact he soon ONLY answered to the other name.

I’m ashamed to admit I ended up sharing him.....

Men are all the same. GPS tracker. That's what you need. I'm sorry to say but it sounds suspiciously like the old story. Be warned if it is and you start calling the OCW names you will get flamed.

Best start getting your DiaR (you know, the words that you must not say on MN for fear of ---

I have 4 gorgeous moggies! I confess I always worry if they don’t show up in the morning for their breakfast! I really do understand.

But wow, you had me going, I was also all set to say LTB until I twigged lol.

Mine used to run off to cat lady who fed him ham and treated him like a god.. we moved house he hasn’t forgiven us

See, with the jumping on your knee as if nothing was amiss, I would say he was gaslighting you.... does he catch mice do any household chores at all? Is he bringing anything to your life to make up for all this heartache? What do you currently get out of this relationship?

User, he is quite obviously a god. This is where you went wrong.

Ours buggered off out last night

She did come in cold and wet though (and immediately jumped on my bed)

What do I get out of this relationship?

Filthy bedding, scratches on my nose when she isn’t getting enough fuss, dead mice in the house, not dead mice in the house....

Wouldn’t have it any other way. Stockholm syndrome probably.

He’s lost respect for you. I bet it’s not the first time and you know what, he’ll do it again.

Wise up... he’s treated like a god at home. Not a single decision is made without running it by the cat.. he acts like I wrong him when I have to go to work during the night. He sits on the stairs and waits for me like I am a naughty teenager coming home drunk

Reminds me of this...

LTB.

OP I don't want to upset you but it sounds like you might have to put up with this kind of behaviour again if you want to keep him in your life. You don't own him, you are his personal servant

MrsTP that has got to be the internet quote of the day.

Is he secretive with his phone?

Whatever happens OP, do not give him an ultimatum. Do not throw hysterical scenes in the street. Don’t text him. Don’t question his whereabouts. It will be his excuse to come and go as he pleases. He has to want to be a “one family” guy.