To wonder why she's thinking of home schooling?

[SharkiraSharkira]

I am not wishing to sound judgemental or critical because I think that for some children/parents home schooling can be very beneficial!

I'm just trying to get some perspective from others who have more experience with it. Reason being is that dss' mum has recently asked dp about home schooling dss. He doesn't really know much about it either way but from what I do know I would think dss is better off in school for the following reasons:

He is a very sociable child with lots of friends at school. If he was at home he would have very limited opportunities to interact with his peers

He is doing well academically, and has no trouble with bullies or anything similar

Dss' mum works part time but has multiple health issues and somewhat limited mobility.

It seems to be that there would be no real benefit to taking him out of school and that she might struggle to keep him stimulated and challenged given her health issues and it might be too much for her to manage. I mean that kindly.

But I'll be honest and say I don't have any experience of it. Aibu to think it's a bad idea?

Both parents don't have to agree to deregister a child, it would be bad though if one deregistered and the other parent with PR registered them again.
They only needed one signature when we decided to H.ed

The school system doesn't encourage critical thinking IMHO.
Targets seem the be all and end all. Restrictive subject matter. The questioning of said matter isn't encouraged. So much time at school is wasted with all the messing about.
My son is grown up now so that ship has sailed, not that I'd have been in the position anyway. But I think home schooling is a better option.

Home Ed can be done very well, however if a parent has health issues then I'd wonder about how successful it would be. Your DP needs to be discussing that carefully.

Your partner needs to work out if it's about dss or the mum. Does a he want to home school for his needs or her own.

It could be selfish reasons - because she wants to give up work/not pay for childcare. Perhaps finds getting up difficult for schools runs. Dies she struggle to get to the school.

Or it could be she wants different style of education for dss.

If I was your dp, I would want a very solid plan on what's she teaching/how she's teaching. How will she meet his needs once reaches secondary etc

Is it possible DSS's mum finds transporting her DC to school difficult and wishes it wasn't a daily chore? However, most HEd children need regular trips to places such as museums, libraries etc and activities local HE parents organise for the children. Providing educational materials would be more expensive, also.

My worry would be about how she will managed to HE with health issues.
As well as the financial side of things.
Would the younger child be HE too?

I've seen his school reports so I know the rest doesn't apply to him either. He is doing very well and is happy

Hahahahahaha How many school reports have you seen that say e.g. This pupil is ostracised in the playground and in class by his peers for much of the school day. He is called names, made to be a scapegoat and is frequently taunted and bullied. Despite this and although his academic results are within normal limits they could be much better if educated somewhere else.

You have no clue what's going on at his school just by reading a report. A school report like the one you've read can very easily pertain to the same child as the one I wrote.

To home-ed or not is a decision for his parents. By all means do research unbiased information for his father to look at - although his father ought to be doing that himself, but apart from that you need to be neutral. His father needs to have probably several discussions with his mother to find out why she believes home ed is a bettter option than conventional schooling.

Whatever you do please don't mention it to the child, nor try and ask the child for his opinion about his current school.

I pulled DD out of school but the reason is obvious to everyone who knows us. She was being horrendously bullied, even by adults lying in wait down the road from school, with their bullying children.

I had not believed I could do it well. I felt forced into it by the situation and school not even doing the simple thing of making the main bully go out of another gate (that would not impact on her journey home, but would add a considerable distance to DDs already long walk home).

DDs reading age was tested at school in June and found to be her exact age. I tested it at home last week, after a few weeks of HE and it is now 4 months over her actual age.

Today she has done her maths, English Language, read a synopsis of Macbeth, done a quiz on it, got 10/10. Put the crimes of Macbeth in order of heinousness.

I actually see now that pulling her out is best for her academically too. I CAN do this.

Maybe your StepS DM realises this already and is doing it to improve his education.

My worry would be about how she will managed to HE with health issues.

I am disabled, so much so that I got PIP first time of applying. I have a blue badge, cannot walk very far at all. What exactly do you think I will struggle to teach my DD, Trafalgarxxx?

exams are expensive, actually, cheaper than uniform, rcat.

We live very rural and one of my friends nearby home educated her two children. It worked out fine when the children were young, they were happy but as the boy got older he wanted to go to school as he wanted to meet boys his age and do 'boy' stuff rather than doing the same activities as his little sister. They were in a local HE group but as we are rural, local was still 20 miles away. The family also travelled quite some distance in car doing educational activities outside their home ie museums etc. It worked for them when the children were small but both children are now in secondary schools and happy.

Point 2. Homeschooled children on average achieve much better grades then state school educated kids.

I genuinely never knew that

If you’re wondering, then ask her. If she wouldn’t discuss it with you, that should give you a message as to how much of your business you think it is. Talk to his father about it and if he is fine with it, then butt out.

What is she like? Is she intelligent/well educated? Is it possible that she thinks that the school isn't pushing her DS hard enough? Is she a bit snobbish? Might she be co concerned about her son picking up bad habits from his classmates? You mentioned health issues-how does she get him to school? Is it possible that she is just really struggling to get him there and back? What is she like generally as a parent? Does she always put his interests first or is she more prone to putting herself before her children?

Tiny proportion of the school-age population, getting one to one tuition. Includes a lot of middle class lentil-weavers who will put effort into their education - same dcs would probably do well at school too.

I find it odd at year 5 if there are no issues.

I do wonder if it is something to do with mum struggling to get DSS to school ( guessing no idea what her health issues are)

Your DP needs to speak to mum and find out her reasons why?
How he would be taught?
The financial aspects.
How will DSS be cared for while she is working? or does she expect DP to fund that?

There are many reasons people opt to home ed.
Your partner needs to sit and speak with his ex and find out more, he also needs to research into home ed, join a couple of Facebook groups and learn a bit more about home ed.

Maybe she's worried about the pressure piling up in year 6? That was one of the reasons I took my son out, I knew that he wouldn't cope with a year of only practice SATs and then the actual thing.

I'd also been asking for help for him for years but they hadn't bothered - and I knew they'd panic when he wasn't up to scratch and try and get him into before and after school clubs to get him up to standard.

Yet strangely all his school reports said he was doing fine.

I recently joined our local home ed group because our DD is due to start school in Sept but is possibly going to need some extra help so maybe part time school would help at first.

There is almost nothing going on regularly locally - one group a month for teens and tweens, and a once a week daytime swimming session. Everything else is in a weekend/evening slot (which is not much use for us due to existing activities/age/tiredness). And mainly half an hour away.

It sounds really lonely TBH. I was expecting a rich world of primary age arts/science specialists/forest school etc. DD is summer born and small and would probably happily carry on going to preschool things for the moment.

Atm I'm not sure if she, her dp or her mum takes him to school but I don't think she does the school run every day as her health fluctuates and on a bad day she can't get out of bed.

Her mum looks after dss/other child and she has lots of friends who provide childcare so she can work so this isn't an issue. She works very part time so I think would continue to do this.

They do struggle for money despite dp paying more than he 'needs to' in maintainance. They have kind of a 'champagne taste/lemonade budget' situation.

Ttbb, not to be unkind but no, not especially, NVQ level education (not childcare/education related). She isn't a bad mother or anything at all, just makes some decisions that I don't personally agree with but that is just my feelings.

Could she be hoping he can help around the home a bit if she is struggling? I would be worried that he might be slipping into a carer role.

I have a work colleague who constantly threatens her children with homeschooling. Thankfully she has a low attention span and starts harping on about something else very quickly.

I can't think of anyone less suited to home education. It's triggered in part by difficulties getting the children into school on time and her non-compliance with school rules.

I think it's important to have the right reasons for home schooling.

There’s a wide range of HE.

Everything from accelerated learning, following curriculm, tailored SEN to un-schooling and shades in between.

I’d always ask, what’s the motivation for HE and how can you deliver what your child needs?

Perhaps your DH should look into what HE could be and have the conversation with his ex.

I agree paranoid. I have nothing against HE at all but I think it needs to be right for all parties involved to be a success.

I don't think that is the case here but I am willing to be reeducated. Ultimately it isn't my decision either way though. I don't think dp is keen, he doesn't think dss will benefit from it.