To think my DMum and DDad should make more effort

[believebelievebelieve]

We live about 25 minutes from them but I can't remember the last time they popped over to see us or the dc (age 10 and 13). It is always expected that I take the dc over to visit them and if we've not been for a while I get comments/atmosphere from my DMum that I should make more effort. They are both fit, have a car each and have a great social life (which I am pleased about). I don't expect them to be round all the time but sometimes feel sad that the dc are getting older and they are missing out on them growing up. The other day I was a poorly and my mum commented that it was a shame they weren't a bit nearer. Thinking about it after 25 mins is hardly a long way. I don't want a confrontation with them but wondered if this is normal and AIBU?

a lot of parents are like this, for me when I visit, its going back to the house I grew up in so I just behave as I did before I moved out, whereas parents visiting their childrens house, maybe they cant relax the same?

My ILs never ever call and say oh we'd like to pop round today. They always wait for an invitation or email something like "haven't seen you in a while would you like to come for dinner next Sunday."

I have never found that to be a problem. In fact, it is one of the things that makes me like them.

Isn't everyone taught that it is rude to invite yourself to someone else's house?

I'd only expect it if someone was travelling and happened to be passing and messaged to see if we'd be around if they popped in.