To not answer the phone (working from home)

[LittleLionMansMummy]

To be clear, I mean not answer the phone to family members - I always answer it to colleagues!

I work from home 4 days a week (on leave today!) Despite repeatedly asking family to limit their calls when I'm working to lunchtime, or to text and I'll call back when free, they (notably my dad) repeatedly call me mid morning, mid afternoon etc. They seem to think that 'working from home' means I can be contacted at any time, just for a chat. Additionally I'm just back from maternity leave and am trying very hard to prove myself to colleagues that despite having two dc I am capable of doing my work well. I'm so annoyed by it.

Recently I was on a conference call. Luckily I had my work phone muted as there were 20 participants on the call. My dad called the house phone. He then called my personal mobile (he's very persistent too). I've begun cancelling calls during work hours. It's never anything urgent and it's not like I haven't explained to him a thousand times!

I don't think IABU am I? I expect he'll complain that I've started ignoring his calls.

I never answer the phone when working....it has an 'off' switch and I switch it off. I have 2 mobiles and they're both switched off. The landline I use for work has a muted ring; if I'm at my desk I only pick it up if the one work-related number is showing on the caller ID, otherwise I leave it. If I'm elsewhere - making a cuppa for instance - I don't hear the phone obviously. Anything urgent and they'll leave a message....otherwise it's clearly only to chat.

I can't understand why people don't switch phones off more often or why everyone feels they can't ignore a call. In the car for instance....why have the phone on? In the supermarket....why do you need to chat in the food aisle, can't it wait? Why is everyone checking their e-mails the minute they get into the street, can't it wait 5 minutes until you're at home/in the office or whatever?

This is one of my major rants....the blind slavery to a phone. Leave it. I actually train clients to contact me by e-mail rather than by phone - I view phones for emergencies only, or else cosy chats with my family in the evening when we/they aren't working. If someone leaves me a non-urgent phone message I always answer by e-mail; after a while they learn....they get a quicker response by e-mail and so that's how they tend to make ocntact. Hardly anyone rings me up these days.... Result!

WorldWide I have two dc and work ft so when they're at the cm and school I need to be contactable.

It's horrible when people won't resepect your boundaries. I had someone come to the door and ask if I would answer a survey. I said "no, I'm working" (computer visible from front door) and she just said, oh but it won't take long. I just repeated, "no, I'm working" and closed the door

I work from home too. I get very few calls on my land line, my mum sometimes calls me but will always ask if I am busy.

I have more trouble with cold callers at the door.

I can't understand why people don't switch phones off more often or why everyone feels they can't ignore a call. In the car for instance....why have the phone on? In the supermarket....why do you need to chat in the food aisle, can't it wait? Why is everyone checking their e-mails the minute they get into the street, can't it wait 5 minutes until you're at home/in the office or whatever

I agree. But I said this once to someone and she said she was so busy she had to take calls wherever she was. I'm not so sure.

I used to get this from my mum when I was in the office. If I didn’t answer my mobile she’d ring the office. It was never anything urgent.

What really used to irritate me is that when she worked full time and me and my brother were teenagers were were not allowed to call her at work under any circumstances. It’s like she’s forgotten what it’s like to work now that she’s retired.

We are no contact now which has solved the problem of her ringing me for no reason.

Busy with personal life that is, not work, though she was probably busy with work too.

Definitely switch providers OR just get a really cheap contract with a better network with a DIFFERENT NUMBER and give that to the school.

This will then be the school contact number which is always on.

Then turn off landline and silence mobile for work times.

Then do this too. If your dad calls in work hours, don't return the call. Train him that if he does this, he gets the metaphorical tap on the nose. Seems that part of him likes the thought that he can intrude, picturing you scurrying to return the call the moment you can. Not nasty, but yes, manipulative, and feeding a small need he has to be important, to still come before your grown-up life which doesn't include him. So DON'T do the scurry. Let him know that all this does is irritate, and push you away.

'No I didn't have time to call back Dad and to be honest I really wasn't in the mood to have a nice chat once I saw that yet again you'd rung and rung and tried to dsisturb my work. It feels like you don't listen at all. I'd rather save a chat for when that hasn't just happened AGAIN to be honest.'

etc.

I can't understand why people don't switch phones off more often or why everyone feels they can't ignore a call. In the car for instance....why have the phone on? In the supermarket....why do you need to chat in the food aisle, can't it wait? Why is everyone checking their e-mails the minute they get into the street, can't it wait 5 minutes until you're at home/in the office or whatever

I also didn't mention that I work in public sector IT, so being contactable is pretty important as there are a lot of genuine emergencies. It's also thanks to IT that I can work flexibly and remotely, hence being able to maintain both a career and children! So while I understand the sentiment and it would be great to go off grid sometimes, you'll not hear me complain too much about technology!

I'm with you on the joys of tech @LittleLionMansMummy

I'm often checking my emails e.g. in the street or a café as I've scheduled my work to enable me to meet friends for coffee during a normal working day. But I still need to check in every fifteen-thirty mins 'just in case'.

I work from home quite regularly. I have work and personal mobiles and a land line. Landline is turned down and goes straight to voicemail, mobiles are on silent /vibrate but visible on my desk.
Work people use work mobile, most non work people don't have this number.
I answer personal mobile based on number recognition, most work people don't have this number.

I don't understand why anyone feel they must answer a ringing phone (or the doorbell for that matter). My phone is always on, but I only answer when I feel like it.

let's face it, if I am in the loo, giving a bath to my baby, in my office, in my car I will not take the call anyway, so people are free to leave a message. If they don't, that means they had nothing important to say.

For URGENT matters, my friends and family would always text first anyway. People are more likely to glance at the text and see it's urgent (even if phone is on silent at school, in hospital, at work etc..) than missing out because they waiting an hour or so to check their voice mail.

I think there might be a cheap way to get a "work" landline number that you only give to selected people, then you can ignore calls to other phones during working hours.

If you sign up with a VOIP provider (I use Sipgate) and install a VOIP app (I use Zoiper) on your mobile, the "landline" number the VOIP provider allocates to you will ring on your mobile.

This is free for incoming calls. If you choose to use that phone for outgoing calls, you pay similar call charges to using a physical landline. (Probably cheaper than BT, but I haven't really looked. I only use my VOIP account for incoming calls, I've actually got rid of my landline altogether and migrated my old number to Sipgate. I have fibre to the premises for broadband, so don't need a copper line account for that.)

"If you choose to use that phone for outgoing calls" = "If you choose to use the VOIP app on your mobile for outgoing calls"