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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to be pissed off at child's nursery?

109 replies

Ka2017 · 03/11/2017 03:49

I received my 2 and a half year olds report this week and was surprised by what I received.
I am very familiar with the EYFS working in a nursery within a school.
They have used 'emerging' 'developing' and 'secure' for each area. My son is very good physically and as expected got secure in the relevant age bands for the areas in physical development. However I was surprised to see that in all the other areas he is has been marked down as developing even in age bands as young as birth-11 months. He is in no way at this level, I am under no illusion that he is gifted and talented but he is where he should be for his age. When I questioned this with his key worker and then the manager I was told that unless they see children doing something 3 times they cannot mark them as secure in an area. They then said that my son is where he should be and they haven't got any concerns, they just haven't got the evidence.
AIBU to feel that more of an effort should be made (set up adult initiated activities) to gauge a proper understanding of his development?
AIBU to believe that this report is a bit half arsed and pointless?
It is a real injustice to my son and my argument is, how can I see areas he may be struggling in and see where I can support him if he is marked down as developing in birth- 11 months in all areas bar physical development (Where they have lots of evidence and observations).
To me if a child in my care was developing in these areas at an age band much lower, I would first make sure that I am enabling scenarios where I can see if they need extra support. I made the point that the report reflects a child that is SEN or one that refuses to join in with anything but they then talked about the evidence again and that they know he isn't at that level.
I am fully aware of time constraints and pressures in environments like this, particularly working in one, but I would never give someone such an unfair and inaccurate report. If eveidence was missing I would take time out to make sure i have it.
How can I and future key workers see where my son needs extra support?

He has been at the nursery 8 months doing 1 and a half days. Also the nursery is an outstanding setting.

OP posts:
Original poster
Ka2017 · 03/11/2017 08:36

I just don't feel that their 'word' that they have no concerns is good enough really considering the report I have just received. If he wasn't so happy there I would have taken him out in a heartbeat. I just wanted to see other people's opinions before I speak to the manager again.

OP posts:
BakedBeans47 · 03/11/2017 08:38

He’s 2. I know it’s easy to say now mine are well past that stage but I really wouldn’t worry about it x

Cosmic123 · 03/11/2017 08:43

With all due respect YABVU. Having worked in this type of setting you should realise that these tests have a large degree of subjectivity and are basically meaningless. My cousin didn't speak until he was five and obtained a first class degree from Oxford. You need to see it for what it is or you are going to have a very stressful time throughout the school years.

TabbyMumz · 03/11/2017 08:47

Goodness me...he's two and a half and the people writing this so called report are nursery workers, not teachers. Throw it in the bin. If you have no concerns, he doesn't need support!!! They have told you they need to see him to something three times a week and he's only there one day. I remember seeing little notes in my babies nursery book, like "X did this today"....it's just observations, like the observations you make at home. Plus, they all develop at different ages.

TabbyMumz · 03/11/2017 08:51

The difference is, you are a teacher and they are not. They are nursery workers, who spend the majority of their day changing nappies. I really think you are reading far too much into this. Put your teacher hat away and just remember, he's two and a half!!!!!!

museumum · 03/11/2017 08:56

This is ridiculous and pointless and possibly damaging.
The report should have “not observed” as an option rather than implying the child is at less than the expected level for a baby!!

Pengggwn · 03/11/2017 08:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Primaryteach87 · 03/11/2017 09:02

YANBU, when my child went 2 mornings a week they told me it took a bit longer to baselines and assessments but they were then accurate. It’s really not on for them to present you with a report that it incorrect just because they haven’t made enough effort! Ask them to re-do it.

Bumblesbees · 03/11/2017 09:03

Presumably you spend more time with him than them, so will be able to notice if he is struggling with something, especially since you work in the field, you’ll know what markers he should hit. I think you’re getting hung up on a piece of paper

WhatwouldAryado · 03/11/2017 09:03

It just demonstrates that Ofsted etc place no faith whatsoever in the opinion of practiontioners. They are scared to actually write down their own opinion. Yet swimming teacher's can apply so much more sense. My son has never been observed doing the laying flat being squished through the water as I stopped having to hold onto him before his swimming lessons started. Funnily enough he has made progress through the certificates anyway.

HeteronormativeHaybales · 03/11/2017 09:19

Report?
He's 2! Two!
For the sake of your future stress levels, you need to keep this in proportion. You know he's fine, nursery knows he's fine. Tbph, you would be better off being grateful for that than getting aerated over what a piece of paper says. It's a piece of paper. It doesn't define your ds.

Tbf, the fault is with the nursery/the system that thinks issuing 'reports' on 2yos is a good idea in the first place. A lovely positive learning and development record, and a quiet word if an area of development is giving cause for concern - fine, and good. A 'report' with 'marks'? Assessment culture gone mad.

BackBoiler · 03/11/2017 09:29

My daughter goes to pre-school nursery. She was marked up as being very good at physical development however this in my eyes is her weakest point as she walks and runs very much like a toddler - she is nearly 4.

Her speech and language is excellent, she gets sarcasm, has a brilliant sense of humour etc but because she wouldn't contribute vocally in group time, probably shyness, they had barely heard her speak.

insancerre · 03/11/2017 12:40

Tabbymumz
Nice to see you hold nursery workers in such high esteem

TabbyMumz · 03/11/2017 14:54

Insancere.....who changes their nappies then?..if it's not the nursery workers. They do a fantastic job caring for children, but they are not teachers and should not be writing reports. It's a nonsense. The child is two and a half for goodness sake.

OneMoreTune · 03/11/2017 15:01

As long as you know he’s hitting his milestones and you’re happy with his progress. It doesn’t really matter. Voice your annoyance at the system but at least he’s doing well and his nursery assessment will matter not a jot in reception and beyond.

Primaryteach87 · 03/11/2017 18:00

Two year old checks do get used by schools in some areas, so it’s not irrelevant and it would make me worry that they didn’t really know him if they couldn’t fill it out.

insancerre · 03/11/2017 19:35

Tabby
I actually am an early years teacher and I change nappies
I have a degree and a post grad qualification and I'm more than capable of writing reports
Don't assume that we work with children because we are thick and couldn't do anything else

Mumoftwoyoungkids · 03/11/2017 20:51

In schools the nursery teacher is a qualified teacher. (In fact the person who was ds’s nursery teacher last year - who managed to “get” him after 3 hours a week has just got a job as “Head of Early Years” at the Pre-Prep of one of the (apparently!) top private schools in the country. He was also pretty good at steering them to the loo super fast when they started doing the pre-school clutching!)

In the private nursery mine went to several of them had degrees or equivalent qualifications.

CrochetBelle · 03/11/2017 20:59

If you are a teacher, please be more careful and don't use the term that a child "is SEN". They may have SEN.

TabbyMumz · 03/11/2017 21:45

Insancere....the op's child is in nursery, not a school. The child is two and a half. Nursery workers are not normally teachers. You don't state where you work, but if you are an early years teacher, I suspect you work in a school, rather than a nursery. I was referring to nursery workers who are there to provide childcare! Not education. I don't doubt that some teachers in reception plus may have to change nappies. What I was referring to were nurseries, where you expect there to be babies and children perhaps up to school age. So generally pre school. If you have a degree and a postgraduate education, I very much doubt you will be in a nursery where they pay minimum wage.

TabbyMumz · 03/11/2017 21:51

Mumoftwoyoungkids...In our school the nursery (age 3-4) is run by higher level TA's, not teachers. But as the OP's child is two and a half, I suspect he is at a nursery prior to attending the nursery in the school. Unless things have changed significantly since my kids were in private nursery, not a lot of nursery's employ teachers. It would put the costs up significantly. I also can't see a lot of teachers wanting to work on a nursery, looking after babies and toddlers?

Lovegood91 · 03/11/2017 22:23

TabbyMumz I work in a preschool with children 2-4. I work with people of various qualifications including qualified teachers, early years degrees, early years professional status and degrees in other area. While we may not earn high wages we are all very passionate about our job. The expectations of those working in Early years is rising and many do have degrees (and write reports and change nappies :) )

Op you are not being unreasonable. While many may believe that these reports are unnecessary at this age we are expectated to do reports at 2 years to share with the health visitor at the 2 year check. It is not acceptable that they have not been observed some areas in their time in setting, it shouldn’t matter how few hours they do.

Stormzy · 03/11/2017 22:57

OP, do you have online access to observations? Only because, there's usually a space to include your own, with photos. This might be a place where they can assess your one (also a previous early years worker).

insancerre · 04/11/2017 07:15

Tabby
I work in a day nursery not a school and I also work with another early years teacher who is also more than capable of writing reports despite also being able to change nappies
A nursery worker does much more than just provide basic care
They write lots of reports as part of their job including those for social services or for referrals to speech or language or SEN support

HelloSquirrels · 04/11/2017 07:17

I dont knps whether your nursery is the same but at ours everything is child led so while they can set up an activity in order to observe your child - if they fancy doing something else the staff just go with it.

I wouldnt worry - you know hes fine. I take no notice at this age!