AIBU to hate name shortening.

[starzig]

Probably just me. I see posts of people saying for example 'I am naming my daughter Abigail to be called Abi'. Why not name her Abi then. So common place that people think they have the right to shorten my name too.

I think the basic rule is that you call people what they want you to call them. If that's their full name, that's what you call them.

But when you name a child, you are naming a person. In the end that person will get to decide what they want to be called. By giving them a name which can be shortened, you are giving them options to choose from. I'd much rather do that than pick one of the shortened forms for them, so that they don't have the choice for themselves later on.

My name is pretty and old fashioned and long. I use one shortened form but when people use the other shortened form I think it sounds affectionate and that they must like me. I don't take offence.

My name really can't be shortened for writing down purposes but it does of course get shortened by friends and family. It doesn't bother me now but I hated it as a child.

My husband is Christopher nn Chris (not RL but similar length with a "proper" shortening) and my granny insisted on calling him by the full version until we told her in jest "His name is actually Christian". She'd never actually seen or heard anyone use a name other than Chris so was mortified and convinced she'd been calling him the wrong name for years in a bid to be "proper" x

I'm in the opposite position. I named my daughter a beautiful name because it was my beloved Grandma's, but I really liked the shortened more common version, so that is what we call her.

unfortunately because it's more common and there are a couple of girls with the same name in the class, the school call her the long name, despite me filling in the 'known as' forms.

I can understand why, but it's annoyed me a bit (not a lot, because, you know, first world problems).

Surely you ask someone how they like to be addressed and then call them that, regardless of your own personal preferences or convenience?

Don't ever come to 'Straya mate

I thought Strayans lengthened names.

Dean-o
Shane-o
John-o
Jack-o

;)

Exactly what Bridge said. You’re giving them options.

YANBU. But people tend to do this because they want a cutesie version of a name, especially for girls. My problem is that people actually spell my name differently, such as adding a dash to it because it's 2 words. Or they reverse the name, Mary Anne becomes Ann Marie, that sort of thing. Maddening.

I always use my full name and no-one has ever shortened it. Luckily because DH has the masculine version which he always shortened. If I had shortened mine we'd have the same name

The only shortening I despise is
Spag bol for spaghetti bolognaise

I'm a teacher. When I first meet a new class I always ask them to let me know if their preferred name is different from their name on the register. Virtually all of them want to be Tom, Abi, Katie etc rather than their full name.
Teenagers, especially boys, seem to shorten each others' names anyway regardless of whether it is a name that shortens nicely. So Karen becomes Kaz etc. Might as well give them a name that has a pleasant shortened version in the first place!

That’s the problem though @Lovestonap, so many people think it’s up to them what name you should be called.

Even on this thread, someone is saying someone wanting their full name is “stuffy”. Nope, I just want to be called by my actual name, not the one you think is appropriate.

I disagree OP, as PP have said, it's useful to have a fuller, more formal name. Many children have nicknames which are perfectly fine but maybe won't be appropriate when they become an adult. So then they can choose. Flexibility is never a bad thing is it.

Don't have an issue with natural shortenings (Abi and Abigal being an example I see no problem with)

What I don't like is "we're calling baby Abigail but she'll be known as Matilda" I mean what the fuck is that all about? Pick one name, don't be greedy.

Ive got a single syllable name (as my mum also hated shortened names) so some see it's ok to stick a y on the end. No, no it's isn't.

I agree Crunchymum - only ever seen it on here, and think each time.
I like having my 'full' name for formal occasions and my shortened name for my 'mates' to use.
We made sure when deciding upon names for our dc that we liked - or at least didn't mind - the likely shortened versions. Interestingly, none of them tend to be called the shortenings that I presumed would be the 'natural' ones.

Crunchy I'm with you. All the we'll call her Mathilda nn Tilly. You may nn her Tilly, but other people will settle on a nn you can't control which is the point of nicknames.

Awwlookatmybabyspider At least use the correct name

Spaghetti bolognese

Both of my son's names can be shortened, and both of them are called the shortened form. The one exception is DS2 telling me that he doesn't like me calling him by the short version. He really can't explain why, but somehow he feels my using the long version is a private 'I love you' to him.

The only perquisite I had for names for both boys was that they couldn't be shortened to a 'y' version.

I have a name that can't be shortened. It's also a very, very popular name for my age group and I am generally one of a few in every social group. I HATE it.

Both of my children therefore have long names which they can shorten to suit themselves and which have a number of optons. DS has been the short version since he was a few weeks old and prefers this to his long name. DD uses only her long name.

YANBU to want people to ask before they shorten you name but YABU to hate that others do it.

I like having a full names. It is way to informal to sign an official document or business letter as Pete or similar.

Personally, I'd rather stick with Ms ... in professional situations but I think I'm fighting an uphill battle with that nowadays so I'll settle for the full version of my first name.

Having said that, it is unreasonable to expect friends and family to call you anything longer than one syllable and I've never understood people who get uptight about it. Why does it matter if a friend calls you Abi instead of Abigale? Get a life.

I don't like the whole "to be called" thing. It exceeds a parents authority. Parents get to decide what goes on the birth certificate and what they call the child. Other people are free to call the child by the full name, a shortened version of their choice or something else. Its a bit like people who invent their own nicknames. You don't do that. You introduce the child with the proper name and let the rest happen naturally.

To me nicknames are something generated (often unconsciously) by close family for a child.
I have a long formal name and was given a nickname as a child that was nothing like my proper name. That was how nicknames were generated - usually because of a certain incident/behaviour/favourite song.
It was not a case of naming a child say - Elizabeth nickname Lizzie - that Elizabeth could have a nickname Huggy because of her impulsive hugging of all and sundry when young. She would never be known outside the family as 'Huggy' but by her proper name.
But old gimmer here so I am obviously out of date about the meaning of a nickname

I'm the opposite - I don't particularly like Sam, Abi, etc as full names.

I have a longer name and I go by the shortened version pretty much all the time, but I like having the full version for more formal occasions.

I hate it too. Absolutely pointless

I love having a name that is shortened. My close friends and family call me the familiar, shortened version and everyone else calls me the longer version. When I go for an interview, or promote my business I like having a professional, formal name and I like that it is separate from my personal life. I like that when someone calls my name in the street, I know if they are a friend or acquantance before I even turn around.
A colleague recently discovered my ‘shortened’ name after searching for me on Facebook. He started calling me by the shorter version in work and it felt oddly too familiar, so i asked him to use my full name. I just explained that it was a name for family to use.