To not understand why kids in our area keep moving schools?

[hilbobaggins]

I live in London. There are a LOT of schools in our area, as you’d expect for such a populated area. DS is in Year 1.

I’ve now lost track of the number of kids who’ve moved to other schools, have joined from other schools, or are on waiting lists to go elsewhere. It’s like a constant merry-go-round. 2 more kids from his class have just gone to the local “outstanding” school, and this evening I bumped into a parent from his old nursery who’s just moved his kid from the local terribly-good Catholic school to the local terribly-good C of E. I can’t help wondering what all these parents are looking for from a school, and if they’ll ever find it? DS is my one and only, so this is the first exposure to this system and I’m just surprised at the dissatisfaction so many people seem to have. My last contact with school was when my cousins went 20 odd years ago and I don’t remember this level of “are they or aren’t they in the right school” obsession. I may be misremembering but it seemed back then you just went to the nearest school and stayed there.

Something about all this movement also makes me feel a bit insecure -like maybe I’m missing something. I think our school seems ok - a bit disorganised at times, but teachers seem nice, DS is reasonably happy, has made friends and is making what seems to be decent progress. They are relaxed about homework, which I quite like. Communication isn’t the best, but the teachers have been happy to speak with me when I’ve had questions. My one small gripe is that the curriculum with its endless phonics, writing and maths seems rather boring for this age group but my understanding was that this is more to do with national curriculum than local schools.

There is also a fair bit of grizzling at the school gates about lack of communication, the fact that the teachers didn’t introduce themselves at the beginning of term, the fact that they “don’t really seem to care”. I have a different impression, but are my standards just too low - or are theirs too high - or is this typical of local areas where there’s lots of choice?

I get it actually.
I moved one of mine in secondary. She wasn't happy, had no friends. Moved her to a girls school - she had a ball. She made lots of friends and speaks about that part of her education as the best.
I moved another of mine pre school. She just didn't want to go. There was nothing wrong with the pre school, in fact a friend of mine did a swap to that pre school. But my child was happy in the new setting and looked forward to going.

@kingscotestaff at the parent saying you had two terms to work your magic.

IME there are parents who think there is always something better elsewhere. Rather than looking at themselves & what they can do they blame the system.

I have seen it where I live (west kent) & it happens in Brownies/Scouts/Football teams as well as school!

Trust your instincts ‘happiness is an inside job’. X

Ah yes, it's like revolving doors. I see it most frequently at the end of Y3. We are in a grammar district and parents a targettingvthat goal from that point. They'll typically go to a school that "gives lots of homework" because that's a barometer of 11+ success

So on the rare occasion there is an issue I would go in and speak to the teacher to resolve it together. Many people just go for the jugular with writing shitty letters.
Yes. This.
People who go for demanding meetings and shittt letters become talk of yhr staff room.

It goes hand in hand with the idea that any issue is the school's issue so if a child doesn't do as well it must be a mistake because thr child is a genius. If a child gets into trouble it must be a mistake because their child doesn't misbehave. If they get nowhere with confrontation then thry decide the school must be useless so they'll find another school... and then thr process repeats. Perpetual movers are usually never happy.

I know plenty of dc who've moved school. Here it's rarely about one school being 'better' than another.

Examples I can think of include dc being badly bullied & being so miserable that even if school do intervene a fresh start can help them back on track, dc who have got in with a bad crowd or got used to being the class clown (more a secondary thing) and again a new start where they don't have a 'label' can help them if they want to move on from this, dc who desperately want to take a particular GCSE that their school doesn't offer (dd's bf moved so she could take computing), dc who just don't 'gel' with their year group (very small primaries near here - one friend's dc ended up with only 2 other boys in his year who were cousins and inseperable). Basically a million reasons, and I'd say 9 x out of 10 the dc go on to be much happier in their new school, probably because they go in with a positive attitude and expectations that it will make their life better.

Live in south London (hence the user name) and I am amazed how much of this goes on. Not just at our school but all schools. It seems a bit ridiculous- a local free school has opened up and loads of children have been moved. Our school is pretty good really and communication is better than most. I can't imagine what it must feel like to move your child and then have same issues somewhere else. Part of me wants to say, if you’re unhappy why don’t you get involved, join the PSA, speak up and help make the school better?

Also agree with the above a hundred times over

I moved my child, we couldn't have done anything more positive for them if we tried.

Nothing to do with not getting what we wanted, the school they were at wasn't very good, we gave it a few years and had open dialogue with them but we were outright lied to and fobbed off.

With hindsight maybe we should have been pushier with getting them to deal with problems such as bullying and lack of progress, however judging by how little the school cared when we raised issues appropriately, we wouldn't have got anywhere anyway and would have ended up moving.

The school my child is at now is brilliant, the teachers are interested and engage the kids celebrating their strengths and working effectively on their weaknesses. The difference both in my child's learning and most importantly how happy they are is incredible.

It's not the done thing to say on here but the truth is not all schools are lead well and not all teachers are good at their jobs, same as in any industry. If you end up with a rubbish head and a few duff teachers the end result is unhappy kids failing to reach their potential. People don't have to put up with what they see as a substandard education for their child and if there is a better opportunity for them why wouldn't they move them?

Children that move a lot could do so for a multitude of reasons, home problems, learning difficulties with better provisions at another school, trying to get all the kids in one place, a space opening up at their first choice school, some kids are bullied badly in more than one school and moving can be preferable to trying to stop it depending on the perpetrators. There are loads of reasons before you get to pushy parents who just want their own way.

Sadik
We aren't talking about people who for an actual reason move once.

It's the culture of school hopping as some kind of daft social marker that you care about education. It's the 1-2 years in one school, then move, then move again when you decide which secondary you want and then expecting a school to do in a year what a child would have had in 7 years had they just had a little stability and consistency instead of people moving their child because 'thry brought home a pink reading book 3 weeks running and everyone knows my child is Plato'.

I moved 2 of mine because the primary school had gone completely downhill and we were very unhappy with every aspect of the school from the education to the lack of dealing with bullying. Best thing we did

However, the secondary eldest is at seems to have next to no movement, they had their first new joiner ever this term in year 10 so I guess a truly good school does hold on to their students for the most part.

I went to a new school every year in primary ( dad moving for work). It upset me so much I’m still having issues now. As a result I won’t move my children from the school they’re in, luckily it’s a good school. Don’t these parents realise how unsettling going to a new school is? I have a neighbour who changes her children’s school every year, supposedly being bullied when in actual it’s the dc that are causing the trouble. They can reel off the names of schools that have bullies ( not realising that this happens in every school) and they’re not learning resilience or proper social skills.
I fail to see how these children benefit from these moves.

London is probably more exaggerated as there will be a lot of people who didn't get their first or second choice for reception and then stayed on the waiting list for their preferred place

Yes, the school that DC went to was always a fall back option locally. So, as soon as places become available at the more fashionably sought after local schools, children will be moved.

Quite a lot of local children dip out of the state sector at the age of seven too (which always creates places to be filled by those on waiting lists).

In my DC's experience of their primary school classes, there was a 'core group' of about 15 (out of 30) pupils who remained the same throughout, but with many additional pupils' comings and goings over the years (some only staying for a matter of a term or two).

I am a parent who has moved DC from schools.
The drive to move was because the school(s), whilst on the face of it was/were ok, was letting down my DC and not addressing any of the issues we had (eg, dd not talking at all, ds being bullied, ds1 and 2 having undiagnosed SN and being completely unsupported).
I know several parents who have made similar moves for the same reasons, I don't know one person who has moved for stupid reasons, but from others' perspectives we moved for silly reasons because they couldn't understand the strain the family was under due to the lack of support.
I reckon there are many moves due to unmet needs, but you really do need to be in that situation to have any understanding of it.

I'm with you OP. Though my experience is a little different. Rural area in the north. About five or six primary schools in the area all rated good or outstanding. None are over subscribed (I know, very lucky but it goes downhill at secondary). DS is in the one that is 5 minutes walk from my house. I didn't even look round any of the others. He's happy enough.

Some issues with communication yes, but otherwise fine. If there was a major issue I'd consider moving him but otherwise I don't see the point. Lots of parents in the area seem to see things differently though and it seems to come in waves. One year it was a trend for one school, the next there was a trend for another. They're all really similar!

In our experience some children will do at one school and bad at another.
We moved ours the 5 minute, 2 mile school run turned in to a 22 mile round trip but it was well worth it as they got a much better education not only academically but socially.
If you are not happy you must express any concerns and you may not like the answers, the school we moved the children to was a breath of fresh air. Not all schools suit all children as like adults they are all different, Daughter would have done ok but Son would have done badly but as we moved them they did very well It was luck we spotted all the issues and found a solution, Inlaws Son came out with a very poor education as he stayed.
So I am all for moving as its such an important time of their lives.

We left London before the dc were School age, and I’ve noticed that friends who still live there fret an awful lot about whether their dc are at the right school, and tie themselves in knots about whether they should move them. It’s never for obviously no-brainer reasons like they are being bullied, always just some kind of nebulous fear that another School might be better. Some of them were employing tutors for five year olds!

We are in a rural area where kids generally go to the primary in the village they live in, unless it is full in which case they might get bumped to the next village. But even when this happens, they tend to stick. There is barely any movement except for the occasional house move or the odd one transferring to private.

Maybe it’s a ‘too much choice’ thing, I don’t know.

There are lots of reasons to move, and you can't always assume you know what they are.
There has been a fair bit of movement at ds school, ranging from people who were on the waiting list for the Catholic school, to people who had 2 kids in different schools and had been waiting for a place to come up do they could have them all in the same school, to bullying.
Maybe London is different, but I haven't known anyone move a child arbitrarily.
To be honest OP I would be really nonplussed if teachers didn't introduce themselves to parents at the start of the year, and if communication was poor. I am pretty low key and don't expect loads of contact with the teacher, but most good primary teachers I have come accross have made an effort to be open and welcoming.
Ds primary had such a strong sense of community and shared enterprise, while not having a perfect Ofstead.
So keep an open mind and make sure you are genuinely happy with the school.

Sometimes it depends on the organisation at school.
My DD moved into secondary from many miles away so she didn't have any friends. Far from helping the school used vertical tutoring (no girls of her year in the class) and sat children boy girl in every class. She just didn't make friends. Of course the school said it didn't happen to others but they tend to remain in their primary friendship groups. Moving to another school was fabulous for her.

It's quite static at my DC's primary. The schools in our local area are very good and oversubscribed, people tend to stick there once they've got their children in. My eldest left the primary a couple of years ago for high school and out of a class of 30, 27 of them were the original pupils. 2 left to relocate and 1 had autism and was moved out of mainstream.

I am noticing that from when my eldest started in primary education to now, the expectations have risen. Maybe people are more entitled or maybe they just won't put up and shut up like in the past. It's hard to tell but there's a definite change in attitudes.

Have seen it a lot around these parts (London) but only at primary level. Parents don't always get schools they wanted, plus there is a very high turnover of staff at some schools as teachers move out of London due to the cost of living. The schools can be patchy but equally the parents can be demanding.
It is even worse in the private sector where there is this perceived pyramid to climb - Highgate (say) at the top and everyone shifting around to try to reach the dizzy heights.

All madness of course.