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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to wonder what my DH game is?

3 replies

McBounty · 27/10/2017 20:05

It's taken some right balls to come and post in here.

DH and I are late 20's with one 9 year old DS. We was a military family for 8 years and moved around a lot and DH was away a lot too.

Since he left in Feb and we moved back to our home town with friends and family, our marriage has suffered.

Recently, we have argued a lot and I've really felt like our marriage should come to an end. He has become incredibly controlling. Since I came home, I became a Christian, I have a new group of friends who I see a few times a week and I enjoy my life generally. In army life, I was incredibly lonely. I had no friends and I simply lived for DH and our DS.

He doesn't like this, he thinks I should still be at home all the time. He won't admit it, but his actions speak volumes.

My main point for finally bringing me here is, I have recently come off my antidepressants which has made me snappier. I recognised it and have started to take them again. He thinks I'm a bitch from hell.

There's little things that have been making me lose my cool though and I'm just not sure whether I am BU. Perhaps I am. If I am, I will take full responsibility.

So a few days ago, DH said that I needed to lose weight ASAP because it's just not attractive. This goes without saying I suppose? I don't know.
I am classed as obese and do weigh a fair bit. I have tried so many diets and just can't lose the weight. I've remained the same weight for years. I am however going to see a doctor to see if they can help, and I have started SW (again).

He also did something earlier today that really frustrated me. You know those bloody sugar pens you can get? He walked over and asked me to put my finger on the end. I said no because I didn't know what it was, he then laughed and showed me what it was. I realised he was going to test it on me "as a joke" apparently. I said no, he shouldn't just do that without me giving him permission, he called me a a bitch and that I needed to "chill" out.
I am sorry, is that okay?

These things seem to be happening a lot recently. I don't even know what to do or think at the moment, but I keep feeling this burden that I want out or this marriage. WDYT?

AIBU?

OP posts:
McBounty · 27/10/2017 20:05

I did submit paragraphs, but my phone didn't agree apparently.

OP posts:
saoirse31 · 27/10/2017 20:16

He sounds v annoying , no he's no right to be trying to test u without u knowing, that's totally unacceptable.

If there's a bright side, maybe he's v v unsettled without army. Has he a job? Not excusing his behaviour but maybe its temporary ...

Maybe he finds religion hard to deal with?

But basically you need to talk to each other which u don't seem to be doing...

MayFayner · 27/10/2017 20:21

I can see your paragraphs.

You got together very young, maybe the relationship has run its course.

If you don't love him and you're not happy, leave. You don't need this shit.

The comments about your weight and whatever he did with the pen are not ok.

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