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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Have you ever done a DIY mini op on yourself?

125 replies

yesichangedforthis · 26/10/2017 21:01

If you go to the GP and request they do something and they say ''that comes under cosmetic and you will have to pay'' and you can't afford it, and it's giving you grief, would you
Take Matters Into Your Own Hands?

Okay
So I have a lipoma/cyst/fatty lump on my thigh that is really starting to annoy me. It's been there years so I know it's nothing sinister.
But, it's as annoying as hell.
I've been to the doc and they say it can't be removed on the NHS because it's classed as a cosmetic procedure, and will cost me XXX amount to remove it.
I can't afford it.
So I say, ''I thought you would say that, so I have a back up plan.

I'm going to sterilize the area, sterilize a needle and basically stick a pin in it to drain it.
His reply was ''That won't work, because it will only come back''

My argument is, Yes, it will eventually come back. Ideally the whole thing needs to be excised. Ideally.
However, it will more than likely take quite a while for it ''to come back'' which means I will have X amount of months (maybe even years) before it gets so big again.
So it's in my interests to go ahead, right?
I don't want to go for the rest of my life with a great big blimming lump on my leg.
What to do? If you're poor and can't afford something that's causing you distress?

OP posts:
SchadenfreudePersonified · 26/10/2017 21:38

I would totally do it. And video it.

And post it online - pay per view (there are people who love this stuff)

AngeloMysterioso · 26/10/2017 21:38

Say it’s causing you pain. That’s what I had to do to get rid of two enormous cysts on my scalp.

SilverSpot · 26/10/2017 21:44

I would get a sterile medical scalpe (not a needle, too small) and cut a small line in to see if it is liquid or if it is fatty and solid.

If you really can't afford to get it 'done' I might have a go at home even if it is a fatty solid lump, if you have any nurse friends who can suture you up? Apply topical OTC anesthetic, slice, squeeze out the fatty lump, stitch up.

The worst thing that happens is you fuck it up and have to go to minor injuries to be dealt with properly!

SilverSpot · 26/10/2017 21:45

Whatever you do, film it.

Original poster
yesichangedforthis · 26/10/2017 21:46

I'm taking the advice of the surgeon.
I think it might be a fatty lump rather than a cyst, in which case,
I could do more harm by sticking needles in it Shock
I think I needed somebody to say don't be so bloody stupid! You need to go back to the GP.

Sorry sporners, you won't be getting anything out of me

OP posts:
allegretto · 26/10/2017 21:47

I'm tempted to remove a skintag after reading about it on here...

FenceSitter01 · 26/10/2017 21:47

How much to get it done privately?

A lot of nurses moonlight as Botox appliers! If you can find a willing qualified nurse, she might do it for you for a nominal fee.

MrsPestilence · 26/10/2017 21:47

Don't be too scared, the chance of it being anything really nasty is very tiny.
However, they are unsightly and uncomfortable. You want it removed, that seems quite a reasonable thing.
Clinical Commissioning Groups (CCGs) have an obsession that these things are just cosmetic. Bastards, they would want one removed if it got big enough to be a problem.
To get the cash okayed (that is what it boils down to) you need to present with a growing lump, that needs to be scanned (this will eventually help the surgeon). You need to be in discomfort, at risk on infection (because it rubs on clothes) and mentally distressed. You will probably still have to put in an appeal.
Good luck (I can remember researching local anaesthetics when they refused me the third time).

RefuseTheLies · 26/10/2017 21:48

I had a large lipoma removed on the NHS a few years ago. The local anaesthetic didn't take properly and I could feel them chopping away trying to get the lump out. I'd not fancy trying a diy job.

MrsPestilence · 26/10/2017 21:49

And keep saying on your groin, not your thigh (much more of a trigger word).

Original poster
yesichangedforthis · 26/10/2017 21:49

MrsP
That's food for thought.
It has started to rub on clothes, it's right at pant elastic level.
It has started to grow bigger, so possibly they will scan it?
It is causing me mental distress. I've caught people looking at it.

So, yes, I might have more of a case this time.

OP posts:
PoppyPopcorn · 26/10/2017 21:51

I took my own stitches out after having a cyst removed from my scalp. Wouldn't recommend it though.

BoreOfWhabylon · 26/10/2017 21:51

Nurse friends at risk of losing their registration if stupid enough to do that SilverSpot

Seriously, OP, I'm a dedicated sporner but DIY is not the way to go. You've had good advice from elpinguino, who is a surgeon.

hiyasminitsme · 26/10/2017 21:52

If it's a lipoma it won't drain. If it's significantly growing then it needs investigating.

Original poster
yesichangedforthis · 26/10/2017 21:53

I'm going to phone up tomorrow and try and get an appointment.
I will keep you all posted as to who I get on.
I get the feeling a lot of people have this problem, so it might be of some interest to let you know how I get on?

OP posts:
HeadlessHorsemad · 26/10/2017 21:56

OP did you get my PM?

Original poster
yesichangedforthis · 26/10/2017 22:00

Yes, Headless,
I've replied.
Thank you x

OP posts:
cannaethink · 26/10/2017 22:04

My ex had a lump on his neck which I seem to remember felt hard. A spot appeared on it one day so we started squeezing, pus came out for aaages! It halved in size. Excellent entertainment!
I've removed my own skin tag by cutting it off with a razor. And chopped off a corn on my toe too. I'm all for small diy operations!

Sashkin · 26/10/2017 22:13

Oh dear god, thigh crease level is exactly where your femoral artery and vein run. FFS do not go jabbing around there with a fucking darning needle!

Sashkin · 26/10/2017 22:13

Or any kind of needle!

Slimthistime · 26/10/2017 22:13

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO

Go back to the GP, show them this thread, I think they'll be horrified enough to get this done.

Musereader · 26/10/2017 22:16

I had one on the side of my neck, it appeared about 5 years ago.

Just before christmas 3 years ago it got infected and swollen and really hurt, dr gave me antibiotics and it went down but was still there. About 6 months later it did the same but not so bad - so i went back and told dr i wasnt concerned with my looks as i had lived with it for a year prior, but i wanted it gone as it had caused lots of pain twice already. Got a referral to a general surgical unit in a private hospital (after being rejected by a dermatologist, who said there was nothing they could do) who phoned on a monday and said they may be able to fit me in that friday so they will call back if they can, didnt get a call though, but i got a letter on thursday night saying go on Friday 9am - which was the next day. Scared my manager by calling in sick saying i had emergency surgery that day, spent half a day waiting in a hospital room, finally got into the surgery, around 1pm, had local anesthetic - surgeon took about 5 minutes to dig it out and says “oh yes thats a textbook cyst no need to send for tests”. Got out of hospital about 3pm.

Tl;dr NHS paid for me to have a cyst out in a private hospital.

So, if dr believes that it will cause you pain and distress and not just because of cosmetic reasons they could refer you

MrsPestilence · 26/10/2017 22:19

Lipoma in the groin region are GA jobs. Choose to go for hospital and not the local GP small op stuff. You have important pipes under there.

Original poster
yesichangedforthis · 26/10/2017 22:23

Sashkin, I'm not going to go jabbing around now.
This thread has been a wake up call.
Frightening really. I had the needle ready. Shock

OP posts:
SD1978 · 26/10/2017 22:25

That’s not going to work if it’s a lipoma- it’s a fatty lump, not a fluid filled one- I recently had several removed from my rib cage, and had to be done under a GA- also
Looks like I’ve been stabbed several times because of it! They can be quite deep, and take effort to remove. It will need a local, a scalpel, and potentially internal and external stitches. I’d ask him to refer you, even if it’s a low priority referral- it’s up to the surgeon to say yes or no, and in my case, they said yes because it’s a quick and easy op which they use to fill theatre in between bigger cases. Can you go to see someone privately, and get an idea of cost for private removal?