To Think This Was A Fuss About Nothing

[zukiecat]

This was from a casual acquaintance, he had an issue with a Tesco staff member, he had purchased a few items and went to the self service till which of course said “Unexpected Item In The Bagging Area”

The assistant came over and asked “Would you like some help mate”

Friend got really angry and said “I’m not your mate, don’t call me that, have some respect”

Assistant then said “Sorry, was only being friendly, meant no offence”

Friend then went to Customer Service and reported this poor chap. I work in my local shop and I’m pretty sure that nothing will happen to this poor assistant, and my friend will forever be known as “That customer who is so up himself” Or worse!

I don’t think the assistant did anything wrong, calling anyone “mate” up here (NE Scotland) is a pretty standard way of greeting anyone, “Pal or Dear” if you’re female

Would anyone really be offended by this, to the point of reporting them?

My local Sainsbury’s, I stood at the self service till for ten minutes looking around for someone then the lady at the till says “can I help you” you say there’s a problem then she replies “you’ll just have to wait, other customers need serving first” then after 5 minutes (or Chen she sees fit) the bell is rung, only after you have waited.
They need to transfer him over here! We’ll have him!

"I saw a customer having a go at a shop-worker for reminding the customer they'd left their wallet on the conveyor belt once."

How bizarre! I can't fathom the thinking behind that at all.

I would have bristled a little to be called mate or duck or pet or anything like that.
But I wouldn't have said anything about it.

I loathe being called "mate" by someone I don't know.

I cringe & bear it though.

Pal, dear- even worse!

Why can't people just ask if you need help?

He needs to never ever move to Derbyshire or he'd probably implode at everyone calling him "duck"

I was thinking the same thing.

[fellow Derbyshire person]

What I love about 'duck' is that it doesn't discriminate: young, old, male, female or anything else, can all be called it – by anyone young, old, male, female or anything else.

But sorry to derail, OP, and no, YANBU. Your acquaintance overreacted.

There's a guy who comes into the shop I work in who brings his just about walking toddler. And let's her just wander around while he shops. We have had managers go up to him to tell him to look after his child but they just get a mouthful of abuse. Some people are just cunts.

Wow, he'd hate living up here- the customer service assistants in Asda and Tesco call me 'flower' or 'pet', I wouldn't dream of reporting them for it!

Suggest your friend grows a thicker skin and doesn't take causal niceties from strangers so seriously.

Your friend is a dick. I'd let him know he is, too.

Thankyou everyone

General consensus seems to be that friend was and is an idiot

I don’t have to see him very often, I’ve half a mind to go back to Tesco to see if that chap is there, engineer a situation, then go and tell Customer Services how lovely and helpful he was!

Shop workers are trapped, really.

They are pretty much forced to be polite, at cost of their jobs; they're face to face with customers, with no place to hide. They're sitting targets for people who are angry and just want to release all that anger and frustration at someone.

I have some pretty bleak theories about this.

In short, be nice to shop-workers: they tend to deserve it.

Do it @zukiecat !

I think I will MrsTerry

I feel so sorry for him!

my df hats it but wouldnt complain

your friend wouldnt like it here its mate and darlin all day-doesnt bother me

Unless your friend is Prince Philip, he is an obnoxious snob!

I've noticed that when men come into my normally female staffed workplace and see a rare male staff then 'mate' gets employed a lot by both of them! Its quite funny to watch really.
'Can I help you mate?' 'Yeah, just this mate, thanks mate, see ya mate'

The staff member sounds lovely and friendly and the complainee will get a name for himself as a twatwaffle.

I notice that my parents do a tiny eye roll if they referred to as 'guys', as in 'can I get you guys anything to drink?' but they would never say anything, let alone complain about it.

I don't like being addressed as Mate (or Love) either. But your friend overreacted going to customer services. A wince or sigh is enough.

Hang on, I WORK in a supermarket, and the customers call me love, dear, sweetheart, hun on a regular basis...

Who do I complain to?

twatwaffle

In the shop where I work it’s all “Mate, Darling, Sweetheart, Lass”

But it’s a very local store so everyone knows everyone and nobody gets offended

Your friend was very unreasonable. Shop floor staff in supermarkets are not highly paid but they do have to take a lot of flack from arseholes customers.

A friend of my DD works in one of our local Tesco stores. A customer once asked to borrow a jumper because the refrigerated and frozen food aisles were cold. The person was not best pleased to learn that Tesco do not have a policy of loaning out jumpers or jackets for use in store and commented "suppose I'll have to bring my own next time then" before flouncing off.

Some people are just entitled and rude. I think treat people as you would wish to be treated. I know too that if I have forgotten to bring my own cardigan or jumper to wear in store then it is my own stupid fault and nobody else's.

I didn't like being called darling and sweetheart by the woman young enough to be my daughter this morning. Felt affected. I wouldn't report for it though.

Australians use the term 'mate' regularly and it's used as a way of telling people you want them to feel comfortable around you.

I also think you're friend over reacted. In hospitality myself and having been in retail the 'sitting duck' comment is right on the money. Some people seem to actually want bad customer service at times so they can vent their frustration and demonstrate their power by having a go at someone and then complaining to 'have something done'. I personally hate being called love, but in my job it happens a lot but if I were to ask not to be called that it'd be seen as rude and unreasonable because the person was just being nice. I wouldn't ask not to be called it though, because I'm not a twat, I recognise it for what it is - a form of address to someone you don't know but need to have contact with and be polite to if you're lucky

your friend. Not you're

Miaow, I absolutely ADORE being called 'duck', it's the only endearment I like from strangers and I go up to see my Derbyshire clients as often as I can.

I don't understand though why the assistant couldn't have just said, "Can I help you?" without attaching anything else to the sentence. Your friend was indeed a knobhead though OP, not for complaining to the assistant but definitely for going to customer services about it.