How do you know the difference between a teen who is just being a teen and going through all the emotions and moods that are part of the “normal” process and when there is a real mental health problem? DD (13) is an only child, we’ve always been close. She has always been bright, kind, caring and a lovely, if a little dramatic, girl, she loved primary school and we have had no issues at all with her. She now hates school, hates her appearance, seems to hate me a lot of the time and seems miserable most of the time. She locks herself away in her room and always seems angry and unhappy. She does attend outside school activities which do seem to cheer her up and gets regular exercise which she says makes her feel better. She attends a very good state school but despises it. We have asked her if she wants to change schools , she doesn’t as she thinks it will be the same everywhere. At school she is polite, well behaved, works hard and the teachers love her but at home she is miserable a lot of the time and questions the point of everything at school. She tells me that it’s no wonder so many young people self harm or take their own lives. She thinks the education she is receiving is a waste of time. If I try to talk about it , to explain or rationalise she gets angry with me, saying I don’t understand. Is this normal? I am worrying about her so much and just don’t know what to do. What if I leave it and just think she’ll come round when the hormones settle and she doesn’t? How do I know for sure that she doesn’t need real help? Sorry this isn’t a real AIBU but I just hoped there would be more people around. Thank you in advance for any help or advice you can give.