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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Is breastfeeding “weird”

114 replies

Sunnyx · 24/10/2017 19:42

I totally don’t think it is and I ebf my 5 month old but apparently only 1% of women breastfeed by 6 months.

I guess I just worry what people think too much. Apart from breastfeeding groups, I kind of feel like the odd one one and a bit awkward when breastfeeding around other bottle feeding mums.

I never really know what to do...when I’m in the company of my family/extended family I feel awkward feeding in their presence but then I think why should I go to another room. I worry that people think it’s ‘odd’ to breastfeed as it feels quite rare to find other mums who do.

What are people’s opinions?

OP posts:

taybert · 24/10/2017 20:41

No weirder than growing another human inside you.

MamaOfTwos · 24/10/2017 20:43

I whacked a boob out everywhere and anywhere with DD1, she's only just self weaned at 13 months due to my being pregnant. Never had anything more than tuts and headshakes from old dears, nothing from bottle feeders. Fly that boobie flag!

AssassinatedBeauty · 24/10/2017 20:44

ebf - exclusively breastfeeding

JonSnowsWife · 24/10/2017 20:45

No.

Misspilly88 · 24/10/2017 20:51

Of course it's not weird! It's the biological norm for our species :) though, I know how you feel as where I live...theres a LOT of babies and the vast majority of the mums breastfeed so I felt self conscious bottle feeding at groups etc. You carry on feeding your baby whichever way works for you!

troodiedoo · 24/10/2017 21:06

I've never had any comments about feeding in public apart from dm

nutbrownhare15 · 24/10/2017 21:08

AuldHeathen ebf is exclusive breast feeding (i.e. breastmilk is the only source of nutrition, so no formula or food. )

OhOurBilly · 24/10/2017 21:10

I think it's awesome. Still feeding my 11 month old. I'll feed him till he's not interested anymore. I had a really difficult time early on with an undiagnosed tongue tie (not diagnosed/divided till 19 weeks) and being brushed off by health professionals who were unhelpful when I was desperately asking for help.

I'd set a goal of 12 months and I'm really proud I've nearly achieved it. To me, it's the most natural thing in the world. I've never had any negativity, a few people seem a bit astonished when they ask but more in a "but he has teeth/wow/that's determination" kind of way.

AuldHeathen · 24/10/2017 21:16

Oh thank you. I’ve only ever seen it on MN ( my own marathon bf career was over before l came on MN) and l thought there couldn’t be that many mothers expressing milk!! Exclusive makes much more sense.

Engorged · 24/10/2017 21:17

Many of my friends have almost exclusively breastfed but because they've given one bottle they don't count in any statistics about breastfeeding. A lot of the women around here mix feed including myself.

I don't think bf is weird but my baby is almost 1 and I'm still doing it. I do find people are often asking when I'll stop now and making comments about it.

Catwithglasses · 24/10/2017 21:17

Of course it's not weird, it's just less common. Being the minority in anything can make you doubt yourself.

Whilst I never had any doubt choosing to bf and was quite aware I was perfectly 'normal' to do so and within my rights anywhere, I did find attending a bf cafe helped with confidence and to normalise the feeding of older babies (and I still bf 2 yr old at bedtime).

EasterRobin · 24/10/2017 21:19

The 1% ebf figure is so low because the classification is unrealistically strict.

In my mind I was ebf-ing, but I wasn't counted as such. When asked (I actually am one of the people used in these statistics) I wasn't included in the 1% because DD drank a mouthful of formula about once a week to tide her over when I was asleep and too tired to feed her. Any tiny consumption of food/drink other than breastmilk means the mother is not ebf-ing her baby.

I would love to see a figure on what % of women are still mostly bf-ing at 6 months. I'm sure it would be far higher.

Neolara · 24/10/2017 21:21

I bf my 3 dcs for over 4 years. Pretty much everyone I knew bf their dcs. It was the most normal and natural thing in the world. However, now my dcs are older and I don't know anyone with tiny babies any more, if I'm honest, the whole concept of bf does seem a little bit weird. And that in itself is decidedly odd..

StepAwayFromGoogle · 24/10/2017 21:22

Of course it's not weird! In fact, I think people are MUCH more judgemental of bottle feeding. I don't understand it. Breast fed babies are fed. Bottle fed babies are fed. The important thing is that they are fed. Why on earth would anyone think they are 'better' than another mum because of how they are feeding? And when they choose to wean or introduce formula? It's bonkers. Each mum does what's right for them and their baby. End of. Absolutely nobody else's business.

AssassinatedBeauty · 24/10/2017 21:23

@Engorged that's not the case. If a baby had some formula at birth, but at 6 months is having only breastfeeds then they would count as exclusively breastfeeding at 6 months. It's what you're doing at the time of the survey, not what's happened before. At least, that's my understanding.

midnightmisssuki · 24/10/2017 21:23

no don't worry about it (coming from me - a complete worrier!) BF is probably the one thing i didn't worry about - i bf my daughter till she was 2-ish then fell pregnant with my son, had HG so my poor daughter was forced to stop. I hope to feed my son till he wants to stop (obviously he has normal food too now as he is 1) but i wouldn't say bf is weird. Quite normal really.

SuzukiLi · 24/10/2017 21:26

I hated it but I don't think it's weird!

MagicFajita · 24/10/2017 21:28

Not weird in the slightest!

I've always bottle fed but never once thought anything of seeing a baby having a feed directly from their mum's body. It's natural.

Please stop caring about what others may be thinking op.

Engorged · 24/10/2017 21:28

AssassinatedBeauty no the survey is nothing but breastmilk for the whole six months from what I see which is why it's such a low figure. Soneone up thread took part.

My health visitor classified the friends as exclusively breastfeeding when talking bur had to write 'mix feeding' in the red book.

chewiecat · 24/10/2017 21:42

I EBF my DS until 6 months then introduced solids
He's 8 months now and still a booby monster
It was really hard at the beginning but I love the bond we have now.

I don't feed in public anymore but that's because my DS is too busy exploring everything during the day to want a feed. It's impossible to feed him in public, he's got much better things to do!

so I really enjoy the quiet time we have when I feed him in the evening. It's so nice to reconnect and have some peace and quiet

AssassinatedBeauty · 24/10/2017 21:46

At my 6 month and 9/12 month checks "exclusively breastfeeding" was written in my red books even though both of mine had some formula in the first month due to medical issues at birth.

AnyFarrahFowler · 24/10/2017 21:50

It never crossed my mind to try and hide the fact that I was breastfeeding, in public or with family. I was feeding my baby, just like someone using a bottle was. I find it genuinely baffling when people have an issue with it, I can’t wrap my head around it at all, and it makes me wonder what has happened to make them draw the conclusion that it is “wrong” or should be “covered up” somehow.

Then I dont give it a second thought

Pinkvoid · 24/10/2017 22:18

My DM finds it weird. She never even tried to BF my brother or I, she said the whole concept felt odd to her. Even when I had my DC and was breastfeeding she’d comment on how I was a glorified dairy cow . Some people sexualise breasts too much I think, to an extent they forget the purpose of breasts.

It’s not weird at all, it’s completely natural.

Viserion · 24/10/2017 22:19

Assassinated I took part in both 2005 and 2010 surveys.

Your HV definition of EBF is not the same as the survey, which specifically asked if your baby had ever received formula milk at various different ages. And also whether they had received solids, what age you had started at etc. I think there were 4 forms to fill over about a year on each occasion.

Your HV definition looks to be that the only milk your baby was receiving at each health check was BM not formula. Just a different definition/interpretation.

mistymumma · 24/10/2017 22:23

It is the most natural thing in the world. I am still breastfeeding and my daughter is a year old. Will stop when she wants to

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