To think my boss is taking the piss?

[poodlesquish]

Boss has announced that she expects me to dial into a conference call whilst I'm on annual leave next week.

Apparently this is because 'she won't have time to become well versed in the matter' despite the fact that she's been involved in all discussions on the matter so far and the call is next Friday- over a week away.

I will be 5 hours away visiting my mum who is recovering from major surgery, but 'it's only an hour in the morning'. It won't be though, I'll have to have a pre-call with internal colleagues before we join the call with external people, and then will probably have to send follow-up emails.

I wasn't even invited to the bloody call, she was, she's just decided she can't be arsed and so is fobbing it off on me.

Ffs. I can't really refuse, but AIBU that I shouldn't be expected to do this?

My BIL was flown home to Italy for a meeting in the middle of his fortnight in Tenerife. He suggested a video conference call but it wasn't good enough, his company insisted he was at the meeting in person. He's now much happier in a new job.

Ffs. I can't really refuse, but AIBU that I shouldn't be expected to do this?

You can refuse - she isn't holding a gun to your head - but you do need to stand up for yourself.

I would definitely put it in writing that you are going to be away on Annual Leave and won't be available for the call. If you want to throw in an excuse you could use the PPs suggestion of not guaranteeing to be in an area where you can get a stable signal for the call (My parents live in the middle of a town but half of their house is a mobile signal blackzone - you have to sit in the corner of the front room to get anything - and their internet speed is shockingly slow) or just tell her that you're going to care for your mum after major surgery and so won't be able to manage the call.

Dear

Further to our discussion earlier/the other day, I would like to confirm that I will not be available to participate in the conference call at 10am on Friday October 5th regarding .

I will be on annual leave from until in order to care for a family member following major surgery and therefore would not want to commit to this conference call when I cannot guarantee that I will have availability or ability to participate fully due to not being in the office.

Thanks,

PoodleSquish

It's your AL, you are not unreasonable to decline.

But, for me, it's swings and roundabouts.

My boss gives me more than is probably reasonable in terms of time off for the childrens' events, work from home in holidays etc, I basically pick and choose my start and finish times...so, if I was on AL and he asked me to dial in, I'd do it.

Obviously if I was abroad I wouldn't/couldn't but the majority of the time I am in the UK looking after the kids during the holidays so would agree to dial in.

Do you have any time off for similar things OP?

I'm a manager and Head of Department, supervising a team of highly qualified and experienced legal professionals. In most other businesses we would probably be expected to do things like this whilst on annual leave. Thankfully, our present employer in the industry we work in would not expect this of us. As a manager, I would never dream of asking anyone in my team to attend a call if they were on leave. Either I would do it or we would do it or re-schedule the call. There are very few matters in life which are so time- or person- critical that they can't be re-arranged.

I offered to attend a conference call for a previous employer (similar ethos) when I was on annual leave (it was actually the day before our wedding, in a foreign country). I did the call because I chose to. People were appreciative, but it was not expected of me. i took the time back at a later date.

In short, your boss is an asshole and YWNBU to tell her no. However, as others have said it does depend to a large extent on the working culture and expectations in your company/ industry.

just tell her that you're going to care for your mum after major surgery and so won't be able to manage the call.

Not her business and no need at all to tell her this. It makes no difference if the OP is using her leave to care for her mum or to sit in PJs and watch Netflix.

It really depends on the job. And as PP said, how the company otherwise treats you. I would call in, if it was something I have been dealing with anyway, and it's an important matter that can't be postponed - I'm paid handsomely to do that, and I have a lot of flexibility otherwise, so it's swings and roundabouts.

Not her business and no need at all to tell her this. It makes no difference if the OP is using her leave to care for her mum or to sit in PJs and watch Netflix.

No she doesn't have to, but if the OP normally has a good relationship with her boss then why not impart the reason so that it is made clear that it is a "can't not won't" situation and therefore there is no room for negotiation.

I have a good relationship with my supervisors and managers so if I was to tell them that I was caring for family they would do everything in their power to make things easier for me. I am coming at the situation from the perspective of someone who would rather be honest with my boss and give them minimal "personal" information (AL will be used to care for a relative recovering from major surgery) in order to get the maximum benefit (not being expected to work during AL) rather than sticking rigidly to the idea that because I am not contractually obliged to share the information, I won't, when that means there is more chance of the boss pushing their luck and trying to get the OP to do the conference call anyway.

Employee gives an inch, employer takes a yard and next time expects a mile. That would be my fear in such a situation. Important to establish boundaries from the outset in order to avoid becoming the gaffer's patsy.

My OH has done this from time to time, usually because it's some sort of life and death issue (life and death to the IT world anyway) and because he was available.
However, his employer is really flexible and he works from home. They don't mind that he takes DD's to school in the morning and he gets to attend school plays an dentists appointments etc etc in work time. So he feels it's fair if it's something important and he also says that sometimes it's just better to do it and not have to clear up a mess because you weren't involved in the meeting.
However his work would never insist and when someone rang him when we were on our last holiday (halfway up a mountain) they were very apologetic.
It's wrong of your boss to insist, she is being cheeky asking but then you could say yes or no. I would just say it's not possible as you will be at the hospital with your mother recovering from major surgery and there's no way you can do that in the hospital.

Ask her whether she you will be paid for the call plus the prep,