To feel that this is too much pressure on a 4YO

[Hangryhangryhrmm]

DS is 4 soon to be 5. He started Y1 this year. One of the younger ones in his class, some class members are as much as 10months older.

He loves school, happy and energentic child who is full of love and wonder about the world.

Homework every night which he is very good about - enthusiastic even, numeracy and literacy on track.

He finds sitting still for long periods hard, have been told by school he is inattentive and other criticisms. Got to the point where DS was getting v demoralised with the continual criticism.

School is aware that he is on a waiting list for grommets.

His inattentiveness (as they put it) is partly due to temprament, maturity but partly not hearing.

Have been called to meetings and feel they are trying to pin a behavioural label to DS.. feel the writing is on the wall from the buzzwords they keep throwing at me.

2 months in and this already?

AIBU to be fuming and upset!? Scared a poor report will affect DSs chances of getting into another school.

hangry we have a similar issue.

SEN (in my area) covers glue ear because the hearing fluctuates. We have a "care plan" from the Council & School to ensure that DS sits at the front & teachers are aware of his hearing problems (which can fluctuate throughout the day & be uncomfortable and even painful for him!).

Hopefully SENCO will help you and your DS too.

Good luck

Jelly, a good point. I’m have to think about that one and discuss with next school what they feel is best. Very glad your DD is doing well in the composite class :)

Peng- Fair comment. Friday evening at the end of a long week.. we’ve all been there.

In the real world I’m not negative towards the school. I am fully open and cooperative. Of course I want the best outcome for my DS.

The school has some great aspects too, which I see and feedback on. This is a post about a particular issue which has caused me stress. It is possible, for things to be mishandled sometimes. I’m not going into the minutiae.

Peng has said what I was trying to say.

As a teacher I have never come across a child who has behavioural issues, to the extent where parental involvement and meetings are advised, due to age. Age is not the reason nor is it a factor in many cases.

Yes I've noticed children who are ypunger based on maturity and the way they approach their learning, milestones achieved etc. however that has never been a cause for concern in the way the OPs son has been flagged up.

Schools do not go in to considerable depth with meetings, reviews and so on because of age related maturity.

In P1 children aren't expected to sit for a long period of time, even teaching P2 my children would have 5 minutes of sitting listening, max and then carousel activities to keep them entertained and focusing on on different tasks. That stops any attention issues. I know that in P1 they are still very much play based and activities dan be making letters with playdoh, colouring, gross motor skills and so on (especially this early). If your child is struggling with this, with paying attention for a few minutes at a time, listening and so on it may be worthwhile working with the school to assess any additional needs (which can be related to needing grommits) and putting appropriate help in place.

Screw the typos, bloody phone.

Not ok. Sounds pretty awful. I'd be looking for a new school. My ten year olds have 30 mins homework each week!

(I'm a teacher too).

I see what you mean Sailor. Thanks.

I haven’t had great detail to be honest, it’s been hard to get specifics.

With the hearing issues confirmed for a second time, perhaps their expectations may adjust which could help. :)

I did mention the hearing on his enrollment etc. He had another ENT appt this week, which confirms that it’s ongoing.

Wow, I'm a teacher and it more frequently am getting frustrated with school systems trying to get such young children to behave more maturely than they should be! He's only four, he shouldn't be sitting for long lengths of time or doing lots of homework! He could still be in nursery! Good that the school are addressing any genuine concerns re hearing etc, but my goodness, he's only little & probably just not ready for that formal style (& probably lots of other children aren't either)

Thanks for the support Bon. I really appreciate it.

I took my son to a Medical Herbalist to sort his glue ear out. It worked wonders. Teacher said he was a different child, and he had previously been being assessed for a behavioural diagnosis.
We took him of the list for grommets. He was so much happier and better behaved.
The herbalist gave him a tea of elderflower and yarrow, which we mixed with juice, and he took it happily. Of there are not herbalists where you are you could contact their professional body which I think from memory is Just called the Institute for Medical Herbalists, and you could do a Skype call with one of their practitioners?

It really changed my son for the better, he hatred being told of all the time, since then he has not been on trouble in 2 years, and is so much happier.

Ohyes, that’s very interesting. If you don’t mind me asking, how old was your son when rows at school started?
Glad it’s resolved, brilliant outcome for all involved esp your DS