Another birthday party one!!

[Flatstanley69]

You may all recall the party fiasco I had with my child’s party last year where another child sent her invites out two days after mine for the same time and date as ours. She didn’t invite my child (although we had invited hers).
I changed my party time and day and all was well (besides the parent turning up at our party (pay per child) with two siblings in tow.
This year invites have gone out asking for parents to drop children and return to collect after the party (another pay per child venue). I sent a reminder to all parents regarding the party asking for children to be collected after. I did say that if parents would like to stay there is a small charge for this as the venue is not just child orientated.

Same parent has messaged today to ask how many adults to children there will be (4 to 15 children) and they are not happy about leaving their child nor are they happy about having to pay to stay with their child.
Should I be offering to pay for parents to stay?
Thanks in advance.

Any response from her?

It’s sorted with this lady but I’ve had a response from another parent to say her and her husband and teenage sibling will be coming to the party 😳
Now I’m happy to pay for an adult to accompany the party invitees but not the whole family.
Any well worded responses?
Thanks in advance.

lurking - why not just drop off your older child?
Having younger siblings at a party changes the dynamic completely. Foisting your younger child to a birthday party they haven't been invited to isn't on.

I think the parent is being unreasonable..your ratios are absolutely fine for a 7 year old. I'm a rainbow leaders and our ratios for 5-7 year olds on trips are 1:5.

How much is the extra charge per adult/teenage sibling?

It was £2.50 at the farm DD had her party at this year (6th) and we just paid it. Not that many extra parents stayed anyway TBH so it really wasn’t worth creating bad feeling about.

If it’s a larger amount, it’s a bigger problem.

Yes it’s a similar amount and I’m quite happy to pay for an adult per invitee but I won’t be paying for extra siblings or family days out.

My older child is 6. Was 5 when I turned down the last party. Parents still stay at this age in this area. We like to get to know each other and our kids are still quite young. I am dropping him off this time - that was the offer the parent made.

I would probably reply something like. "That's great that you want to make a day if it. You can just pay on the day by if you want to guarantee space for you all you might want to ring up and pay over the phone for your other children and husband as it gets busy"?

Tbh I wouldn’t leave my child with anyone at any time without some sort of family supervision but I would be more then happy to pay as I know I am being difficult. If she don’t want to pay she can just not bring her child

So to give you an example, a year or so ago my son was invited to a bowling party. I said no because I couldn't see what I would do with my younger child. Then recently someone else invited him to a bowling party and I responded with a question around what I could do with the youngest to make it feasible.

Surely you would just pay for a couple of games at a lane nearby and have a game with your younger child, whilst older child is at the party? Why do parents try and make their childcare issues someone elses problem?

I don't know. I wasn't doing that.

No you should not be paying for parents to stay
That woman is ridiculous - do not change your plans to accommodate her

So I think it really depends on how much it is costing, and how far the venue is from home?
If they are able to get home and back and spend a little bit of time at home then it's ok to not pay.

However if the party last 1.5 hours and it's half hour drive and I think you would be unreasonable not to pay.

I'm thinking my ds having a trampolining party, any staying adults would have to pay £2 to watch. I think as it's quite far from home i would pay the cost of them staying

I would probably ask you what the supervision was etc and then maybe say, I will be staying but will organise this myself.
I do think it's unusual that parents can't stay and watch their child without paying but that's down to the venue. 7 isn't very old to be left alone although I know on here it's deemed unusual.
You explained everything on the invite so if the parent is not happy they should just decline.