Does anyone have a good excuse to avoid slobbery kissing relatives?

[dinomum13]

I know I am being unreasonable but I really, REALLY REALLY hate it when certain relatives insist on kissing me on the cheek. I know I should just put up with it, but it really makes me feel ill - to the point that I avoid seeing certain people who are particularly slobbery. I do realise the problem is with me (to be honest I think I have a sensory processing issue as I have very heightened sense of touch,smell etc). I've been racking my brains for a good - permanent excuse I can use to avoid the whole kiss thing (aside from telling them I find their slobber revolting) Any ideas?

As they lunge in for the slobber firmly tell them you have a skin complaint which might be contagious. As sort of rashy virusy thing, a bit like cold sores.

Doesn't matter if they can't see it, they won't (hopefully) want to take the risk. Tell them the outward signs come and go. Be vague about it all.

say no. Anybody who doesn't respect that isn't really worth bothering with tbh.

God I hate this. The only people i don’t mind kissing me are my ds and my dh. Everyone else makes me feel ill.
Tell them you have a cold or a coldsore coming and just lean backwards away from them.

Tell them you've been poorly lately and don't want them to get it

Tell them you have herpes.

''Bye now, lovely to see you, won't kiss you i've got a cold sore coming ... Bye now, i'll see you next x y z''

Don't want your makeup messed up?

I don’t understand this. Why should you put up with being touched when you don’t want to?

Just say don’t kiss me I don’t like it.

I hate hate hate this assumption that it’s rude not to have your body touched because you don’t want to. I don’t even hug my kids when they tell me they don’t want a hug.

Tell relatively don’t kiss me.

Belch loudly as they approach you. That'll learn them!

Could you just say: "no thanks I'm allergic to slobber."

"Oh, don't, I've got H pylori" - that should confuse them long enough to get away

I have an uncle who does this - he’s very bad at picking up on social cues so I doubt he’ll ever change, but I just angle myself so I can give him a quick hug and then pull away before he lunges in.

Totally get where you’re coming from OP.

I like the herpes excuse but how long could you pull it off?

Yuk, I can't stand this. I've just stopped doing it and I've been a little blunt about it. Polite but blunt.

I've also made it clear to friends.

I'd also rather not shake people's hands. I don't understand why it's such a thing.

I would either shout 'NO! I'm getting a cold sore!' Or completely freak out and shout 'No!' - I would hate this op I wouldn't be able to put up with this.

We don't kiss, or hug, in my family, apart from dgs4 who has just learnt to kiss an spends ages kissing people ( mum, dad and me). The thought of anyone else kissing me makes me shudder. Just say no

Thanks everyone - I'm so glad its not just me then!
I love the coldsore excuse and I'm feeling a bit more courageous now to tell certain people to back off from the slobbering!