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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Completely confused.

38 replies

Vsantanaxx · 18/10/2017 19:42

I woke up this morning and said good morning to my partner like i do everyday and got a grunt in response.. he isnt a morning person so i just let it go over my head.. we didn't talk for the rest of the morning until he said bye when he went to work, 5 mins later i went into the fridge and noticed he had left the lunch i made him the night before so i called him to tell him and he said im not taking that shit... i said alright bye and he hung up .. that pissed me off but i let it slide after that he has ignored me for literally the whole day and not said a word to me and he usually calls me on his lunch for a chat so i messaged him and said you clearly have a problem but dont want to communicate it, you can eat the lunch i made you for dinner cause your wasting food then left it at that, he has been home for 2 hours and has not spoken a word to me .. im so so confused cause usually if he has a problem he is quick to tell me but everytime i ask he just says nothing it wrong ... i really am using every bit of will power i have not to lose it with him but i feel like if i do it will give him what he wants. shall i just carry on with life as normal (continue to cook etc) and wait for him to speak to me or ignore him aswell (stop cooking for him and no cleaning) or lay into him and tell him to get a grip.

OP posts:
Madbum · 18/10/2017 21:03

Let him sulk, he’s attention seeking so don’t reward his sulking by pandering to him.
He’ll need to be a grown up and tell you what the issue is, just carry on as normal yourself and don’t let him see that he’s getting to you, sounds like that’s what he wants.
In fact he sounds like a lot of hard work just bin the silly fucker off.

Doramaybe · 18/10/2017 21:05

First off I'd let him get his own lunch together. I wouldn't mind doing a pack up for anyone as long as they were happy with it. If not, do it yourself my friend. I am not your slave, cook, cleaner, whore whatever. Bye bye now.

OverlyYappy · 18/10/2017 21:07

Men are hard work well relationships are. I hope he sleeps it off

iklboo · 18/10/2017 21:09

This is going to sound really weird but I was once off with DH all day because he’d been utterly horrible to me in a dream. I just couldn’t shake how he’d made me feel in it. Thankfully gave myself a swift kick up the arse and apologised for being so bloody stupid before we went to bed.

iamyourequal · 18/10/2017 21:11

OP. is this a significant date for him (not necessarily you too) that you have have overlooked/failed to acknowledge?
I feel for you. My (otherwise great) DH does the cold shoulder treatment occasionally and I can't bear it either, especially when I would never do it myself. Good luck with it..

SparklyMagpie · 18/10/2017 21:18

Fuck that! Acting like a child.

He can do his own cooking and washing etc.

You enjoy your TV OP

applesareredandgreen · 18/10/2017 21:19

My DH acts like this sometimes- but he’s just a moody so-and-so. I just ignore him, then eventually he’ll apologise and say he’s having a bad time At work/argument with his dad etc

Trailedanderror · 18/10/2017 21:26

OverlyYappy
Good relationships are not hard work.

C0untDucku1a · 18/10/2017 21:34

men are hard work

Hmm the poor men. Cant help being twats.

InsomniacAnonymous · 18/10/2017 22:23

Good point iamyourequal. It's not his birthday is it, OP?

justilou1 · 18/10/2017 22:49

FFS - Just tell him that your crystal ball is broken, and that if he has a problem you expect him to discuss it like an adult. You have no desire to play these stupid, manipulative mind games.

OverlyYappy · 18/10/2017 22:58

Sorry I should have said then men I’ve had relationships with are hard work

Trailedanderror · 18/10/2017 23:00

Overly Flowers
I hope you've found happiness now. Have you done the Freedom programme? It's often recommended here for women waking up to abusive relationships, but is relevant imo for every woman.

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