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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To hate some of the terms that mums use on social media...

114 replies

HashtagTired · 11/10/2017 06:59

I’m probably setting myself up for a fall here, but it really irritates me when people use terms like ‘mummy milk’ or ‘boobie milk’ or ‘yummy mummy’s’ or ‘mummy friends’ or ‘mummy ....[enter word]’

Just say it for what it is!
I see it less on MN but it’s all over FB and I find it just so irritating.
Is it just me? Aibu?!?

OP posts:
Flomper · 12/10/2017 07:33

Full time mummy as a job role on facebook profiles. Makes me heave.

SheStoopsToConquer · 12/10/2017 07:41

Ugh YANBU OP. A former colleague hashtags every single Instagram post about her child with #mylittlepetal #themummydiaries. And if her kid was in the stroller when the photo was taken its #bugaboo or #uppababy. Vomit!

QueenOfTheAndals · 12/10/2017 07:43

If you think "mummy milk" is bad, I once heard a grown woman refer to it as "boobie juice". And that was to other adults, not children!

SamanthaBrique · 12/10/2017 07:45

Full time mummy as a job role on facebook profiles.

Or worse is when they add the their children's names to it, i.e. "full-time mummy to Chardinnay, Caiden, Bille-Maiie and Jonny-Blu" etc!

windowSong · 12/10/2017 07:55

“Mumsnet”

CaoNiMartacus · 12/10/2017 08:00

"Mumma"

(Unless you are a mediaeval troubadour mime artist, that is.)

Anatidae · 12/10/2017 08:06

I have referred to it as maternal mogadon. And chateuneuf du Pap.

Not in public, obviously.

Hmmmmmmmmmm10 · 12/10/2017 08:32

Yes, hate that too. In my opinion feeding is feeding, call it that whether bottle or breast, purées or ‘baby led’. I hate the term baby led weaning because the baby has not gone to cupboards and chosen the food and heaven forbid the baby does not follow recipes in cookbooks. It’s essentially finger foods / eating with own hands.

QueenOfTheAndals · 12/10/2017 08:54

'chateuneuf du Pap' must be the most middle-class euphemism for breastfeeding that I've ever come across!!

Motoko · 12/10/2017 09:58

I remember the first time I heard the term 'baby-led weaning' and asked what it was. When they told me, I said, "Well, that's just weaning." but they insisted it was different to how we used to wean babies. Hmm

Anatidae · 12/10/2017 10:07

the most middle class euphemism

You got the pun though, right? Grin

I would never say that in public ;) I bfd ds and my stance on feeding babies is ‘do whatever is best for you and your baby, breast, bottle or a mix of the two.’

I’m always Hmm at the absolute dogmatic ‘rightness’ people have on social media. Their way is the right way! Always!

I fed ds and just got on with it - apparently me giving him a combo of mashed up stuff and finger food was Not The Pure BLW Way and got criticised
I got criticised for bfing until 18m (disgusting apparently)
I got criticised for stopping bf at 18m (I’ve damaged him and should let him feed until whenever despite my hair falling out and my joints being fucked.)
I got criticised for weaning at 16 weeks (despite it being medically recommended because he would t take formula and he was losing weight hand over fist.)
I got criticised for not using a sling
I got criticised for letting him look at the telly for ten minutes while I cooked
I got criticised for feeding him any sugar AT ALL
And on and on and on....

It’s exhausting. Ds is a well loved, healthy, happy, secure, active kid. I’m happy with my parenting choices and BLW can go fucking do one.

Fruitcorner123 · 12/10/2017 10:13

Calling children 'sexy'. Or a 'little flirt'. who does this!?

Goldfishshoals · 12/10/2017 10:40

they insisted it was different to how we used to wean babies.

Its definitely different to how my mother weaned babies. Every time she sees my child eating she asks why I'm not blending that up, or 'have you even got a blender?!?'.

Anatidae · 12/10/2017 10:54

I don’t think I weaned my kid any different to how I was weaned. Started dipping a finger into stuff for a taste, a very brief stage of mooshed up fruits/ porridge just to get used to it, then on to what we were eating, mashed up a bit with a fork if it needed it.

I don’t get the hatred for mashed up stuff - most primates, many mammals chew food for infants. Many societies do too. I think the dogged insistence of ONLY WHOLE MASSIVE BITS OF STUFF AND NO MASH EVER! is a bit odd - just feed them what they can deal with and make it less or more lumpy as needed. The idea is to get them to enjoy and explore food surely? Do that any way that fits

Laura2018 · 12/10/2017 11:03

'Full time mummy' or 'full time mummy and proud' makes me despair for the female sex! Do we not have anything else intersting about us than having children. I also despair at woman who can only have a conversation if it involves their children. Yawn

rubybleu · 12/10/2017 12:04

Bum change rather than nappy/diaper change or just change. FFS, your child does not have an interchangeable bottom.

Camomila · 12/10/2017 12:22

I don’t like ‘bum change’ either, it’s the nappy getting changed - the baby has still got the same bum.

Bit of a odd one but ...teaching children to say ‘ta’ when the adults around them say thank you. I don’t mind ‘ta’ if the adults say it too.

Mum boss - what does it even mean??

Acadia · 12/10/2017 12:29

I was baffled at baby groups that all people wanted to talk about were the babies. I thought it was a cliché, but no, there they were, wanging on about poo textures and frozen baby food blocks and discharge and whether or not little Tybalt had composed his first symphony yet. I was quite surprised to find all the stereotypes and rumours were true.

I stopped going to groups and had no intention of making 'mummy friends'. I took up adult hobbies and made random adult friends instead. And I don't talk about my kids. Why on earth would they want to know?

I think not using the twee phrases meant I'd have never fitted in anyway.

Sometimes I like to say "Housewife", when I was a SAHM, if there was a particularly snooty tone from the enquirer, because I liked it when their faces dropped and contorted in horror.

It's this whole, I dunno, this idea that 'motherhood' is some sort of transformative experience that is so terribly unique that everyone must be enlightened about it - 'the mummy diaries'? Yuk! - as if it's not something just about everyone's experienced either by having kids or being a child themselves and seeing their own mother Do Mothering. Big whippity do. There's a reason fathers - on the whole - don't form Dad Groups, go out with Dad Buds, Daddy blogs are less popular and the ones most likely to hashtag about what a great father they are do it to distract from the fact they see their kid 3 times a year, and they don't go on and on and on about nappies and milk and baby stuff. It is interesting to you but not others. It is not a good topic for bonding with other adults. It is not LITERALLY everything that you are.

It's creepy. I find it kind of sad. Like, is there anything else about you other than 'mother' you want to share with the world?

Swannykazoo · 12/10/2017 12:39

Thank fuck someone else understands that "bums" do not get changed - its the sodding stinky NAPPY you fools

pp2017 · 12/10/2017 12:47

I don’t get the hatred for mashed up stuff - most primates, many mammals chew food for infants. Many societies do too. I think the dogged insistence of ONLY WHOLE MASSIVE BITS OF STUFF AND NO MASH EVER! is a bit odd - just feed them what they can deal with and make it less or more lumpy as needed. The idea is to get them to enjoy and explore food surely? Do that any way that fits

I’m with @Anatidae - if I had my time again I would absolutely NOT purée and mash everything - as a first time mum I thought this was what had to do but only ended with a child who absolutely cannot stand the texture of anything “lumpy” and actually bowks to the point of making himself sick if he gets even the tiniest lump in his food 😳

I wish I’d just let him smush stuff up in his hands and eat how he pleased......

AutumnalLeaves38 · 12/10/2017 12:54

"Booby picky bits"

Only a matter of time...

Anatidae · 12/10/2017 13:03

We have a policy of zero stress about food in our house. If he eats it, he eats it. If he doesn’t, he doesn’t. We just feed him what we have, concentrate on giving him stuff we know he will have mostly and offer new stuff often, encourage him to try it and no stress whatever if he won’t, or doesn’t like it.

Motoko · 12/10/2017 15:24

I think 'ta' is ok if the child is still learning to talk, as it's a lot easier for a child to say 'ta' than 'thank you'.

As my children got older and able to pronounce words properly, then we graduated to 'thank you'.

fivefour3twoone · 12/10/2017 15:52

One of my current love to hates is someone describing themselves and attempting to fling their services as a "social influencer" - is this really a thing now?!

fivefour3twoone · 12/10/2017 15:52

Flog not fling!

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