Sorry it's a long one!
Quick backdrop..Had one daughter with ExH, amicable split when she was 2 and have always been on good terms. Has always been close to my family, and we continued to live close to each other, in our own respective homes. He was very much the doting Dad to DD, and she loved spending time with him. I met DH2 many years ago, and he has been very supportive of my daughter, and I have never asked ExH for anything financially. We had a clean break and simply split our home 50/50, even though it was my original equity, and I made no other financial claim with regards to pension etc. Money was never something I wanted to be an issue, and things were very harmonious for years, until his GF came on the scene 4 years ago. He had bought a nice house from the proceeds of our split, with a beautiful bedroom he had decorated specially for DD, and she loved staying with her Daddy as and when she pleased. His GF has 2 kids, and an ExH of which relations are extremely hostile. They did not own a property together, and she was living in a rented flat when they met. She works on a low wage, whereas ExH is a big earner, and within 6 months, he announced to DD that he had sold his house, and they were moving further away to live with his GF and her kids. 3 bedroom house, one each for her kids, and none for DD. Her kids have huge dysfunctional emotional issues, and one is a self harmer, which completely freaked my daughter out, as whenever DD would go to see her Dad, they insisted she sleep with her in her bed. To try and 'bond' with her. Unfortunately the girl is very messed up, and needed more than a teenage ear! His GF is not very family orientated, the kids spend most of their time in their Dads flat. They never spend Xmas together, never holiday together..it is always them as a couple. They have been on many exotic holidays, but never take the kids.
Needless to say, this has affected DDs relationship with her Dad, to the point she simply didn't want to go and see her Dad. Her kids have bedrooms even though they barely stay there, yet DD was expected to sleep in the girl's bed, or on the couch. And they always arrange for her kids to be there, the same night DD goes to stay. She can't stand them, the boy is arrogant and rude, the girl is reclusive and simply doesn't speak. On the rare occasions DD has tried to spend time with her Dad alone, his GF has insisted that she and her kids come too. It has driven her to despair. DH is forever buying this lady expensive gifts and holidays, yet DD is now a teenager, and can see what is going on. On a recent shopping outing, DD was admiring a coat that cost 50pds, and her Dad scoffed that she had better get herself a weekend job. Then bought GF a leather coat for 400pds!!
The latest in this sad saga, is that ExH came into a large sum of money a few months ago, and has now announced to DD, in front of GF, that they are getting married in 2 weeks time. GFs idea of course, and they'll be honeymooning for 6 weeks. Alone of course. When DD expressed surprise at the luxury of their upcoming trip, he laughed, and said..if you're worrying about your inheritance, then don't. If there's any left, GF will split it between the three of you. They are not inviting any of his family to the wedding, as GF doesn't like them, which also saddens DD, as she used to love visiting them, and misses how things used to be. She came home and cried, and has declared her relationship with her Dad all but over. So how do I broach this, without over stepping the mark? I know it is not my business, but I'm just so sad for my daughter. What would anyone else here do?