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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to ask why some men are totally pathetic pests?

42 replies

SilverySurfer · 08/10/2017 15:52

I'm in my 70s - disabled, home a lot and play an online game.

Was having a jokey conversation in guild chat and a player pm'd me and we had a private chat. He is 22 - we added each other to friend list and continued to have general conversation. Some time later, without warning he suddenly asks me some very personal questions which I answered truthfully. His response: 'OMG that is so hot, I may have to log off and wank'. I 'm speechless - he obviously doesn't care that I'm 50 years older than him as long as he can have a wank.

I was fishing - a player sidled up to me and uttered the immortal words ' wanna ERP?' (erotic role play). Forget hello my name is.... . I said I have some advice: before asking that you may want to talk to the person first. This was an alien concept so I explained that he would then discover, that the person may not be what he is looking for ie I am in my 70s or I could have been a bloke with a female character. I could feel the revulsion emanating from him as he ran faster than anyone I've seen in game.

Yesterday, met another player, he is 41 - general pleasant light hearted chat - perhaps, I thought because he is older. Then today he appears at my side while I am in the middle of the countryside and starts moving his character close up and pushing into mine. I take several steps back and he was shocked. Did I not want to get friendlier? No I didn't!

What the hell is going on? I thought my age would be a deterent. Have I just been really unlucky or are most of the male players arseholes desperate for a wank. Maybe they think I'm old enough to be desperate and wouldn't care if they used me as a wank sock. I'm not and I do! I was talking to a female player, she said she gets it too - she's in her 20s and is sick of it. I think my next character will be male.

And breathe.....

Any tips on how to repel these twats would be appreciated.

OP posts:

Original poster

SilverySurfer · 08/10/2017 17:04

No, it isn't a female only space - I have to seriously wonder if there are any left. The discussion came about because I was thinking of getting a male character but feel that it's just one more change women make to their lives to accommodate men and why the hell should I have to. Am I unrealistic to expect men to control themselves and have a bit of respect?

OP posts:

Original poster

SilverySurfer · 08/10/2017 17:05

If you think I am lying about the 22 year old, please feel free to leave the thread. I see no point in lying on a forum and I am not a troll, but thanks for your contribution.

OP posts:

DiegoMadonna · 08/10/2017 17:06

Who said you were lying? If you're talking to me, you obviously misunderstood my post.

Original poster

SilverySurfer · 08/10/2017 17:09

IvorHughJars How revolting. It seems to be a new phenomenon that boys/men think girls/women are fascinated by their genitals enough to want to receive photographs. Beyond hideous.

Next time you get one I would message 'Oh dear, how unfortunate, have you seen a doctor?' May shut them up

OP posts:

Original poster

SilverySurfer · 08/10/2017 17:11

No not you Diego - I was responding to whoever posted what you have highlighted at the top of your post. Your comment was spot on

OP posts:

WomblingThree · 08/10/2017 17:12

So why did you answer his “very personal questions” truthfully then? Why didn’t you just ignore him?

Iwanttobe8stoneagain · 08/10/2017 17:15

Not only has this world gone mad, it seems simulated worlds have lost the plot too! Never been into that sort of thing but is their anyway to chop their dicks off in that world. To the poster mentioning the peadophile is there anyway of reporting him so he's banned from the game?

Original poster

SilverySurfer · 08/10/2017 17:26

I think at the time I was so shocked the words just tumbled out. I won't be so forthcoming if there's a next time.

YouTheCat absolutely agree re I could have been 12 - how disgusting that would have been. I'm an old bird fortunately.

OP posts:

RebelRogue · 08/10/2017 17:49

If you don't want to change your avatar and I completely understand why you won't and that you shouldn't have to.. then the only way to get rid is to avoid chatting/leave it to a minimum.
Very few social norms apply in the virtual world. Some are so caught up in the virtual reality that who you are is irrelevant.. all it matters that you are female and so is your character. I've known men to still keep trying even after being told/shown that the person with a female character is actually a man. That did not deter them.

Original poster

SilverySurfer · 08/10/2017 18:31

Wow that is truly pathetic. It's a shame, though, don't you think ,t hat we can't pass a bit of time chatting to guildmates?

OP posts:

Creambun2 · 08/10/2017 18:36

why are you answering explicit questions? That is just encouraging someone who is probably looking for sex chat.

RebelRogue · 08/10/2017 18:52

@SilverySurfer if it makes you feel any better(it won't) i also have had experience of a woman on a parenting site preying on other vulnerable women for sex chat and shit like that. Ofc the MO was different ,lots of getting to know them first,sharing thoughts and dreams and shit. And then complete surprise when the women wanted more,felt hurt etc. She'd spin a story then blank them,call them stalkers,take the piss out of them , gang up with her cronies on them ans bully them etc.

Men are more prevalent in this ofc and their dick is often used as a weapon (unwanted dic pics) even online. The fantasy is all that matters, and a quick wank. Many of them barely see women as people,even less so when that woman is just an avatar/computer screen.

The web is dark and full of horrors indeed.

Original poster

SilverySurfer · 08/10/2017 19:40

That's terrible ReelRose what on earth was the woman thinking. You're quite right - to a certain extent this is why I don't do social media, facebook etc. People record every inch of their lives on it - it's scary to me because that info will be there forever. What price privacy? It can indeed be a dark place.

Creambun I was asked that earlier in the thread and I replied at 17:26:

'I think at the time I was so shocked the words just tumbled out. I won't be so forthcoming if there's a next time.'

OP posts:

RebelRogue · 08/10/2017 20:15

Talk only when you want to,about what you want to. You don't owe anyone an answer.
Also remember you are online,you don't have to reply to anything straight away.. you actually have the time and option to stop and think before replying/blocking. If you don't feel you can just go quiet throw a BRB or AFK. But remember you don't owe anyone an answer.

For random messagers,block,ignore,move on. Don't give them any headspace or any replies.
If it's someone you've talked a while and don't want to block straight away,ignore/BRB each and every time they push your boundaries. They'll get the hint or drop you anyways because you're not playing their game.

MumsOnCrack · 08/10/2017 20:27

Be a male character?

Original poster

SilverySurfer · 09/10/2017 00:30

Wise words Rebel.

I have considered a male character but to train it up to max level, not forgetting all the crafting and other skills and achievements which are at max levels, I just don't have the energy to be honest.

OP posts:

silverbell64 · 09/10/2017 00:38

Lots of things go on on line that wouldn't happen in real life. I personally would just block them op.

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