To think most women have had a miscarriage at some point?

[brasty]

I get the impression from talking to friends, that most women have had a miscarriage at some point, although most are very early on. Is my impression correct do you think?

[Tealdeal747]

2/5 pregnancies for me

The NHS/stats will only know about one of those.

Or maybe not the other either as I didn't have an op or anything,

[museumum]

It very much depends on how many women are trying to conceive how many times.
I’ve not had a mc but then I’ve only been off bc once for one pregnancy. If we’d tried for a second or third Child I would expect to experience mc along the way.

[PlayOnWurtz]

I've lost 5. Of the women around me 2 others have lost at least 1. When i was pregnant last time 3 others were, they've all kept their precious babies so we fit the 1:4 statistics well.

To the posters saying it's a heavy late period this is one of my bugbears and I lost my temper at my sister over this. Here are my experiences of early miscarriage (Sorry to others)

5 weeks - yes I agree
6 weeks - more than a heavy period and more painful
8 weeks - definitely not. The bleeding is too much and the miscarriage itself you cannot mistake for anything other than what it is, pregnancy tissue.

[tippz]

It's hard to know how many women have had them, but I bet it's a higher % than the 10% that the poster on page 1 suggested.

Just because someone has never mentioned ever having a miscarriage, that doesn't mean they have never had one. Some people just don't feel the need to tell everyone about it.

[Athome77]

I think often it’s not until you actually have a MC and talk about it that a lot of women come back to you and say “me too”.

I have had several miscarriages, my last one was 16 weeks and I was in a new job, I was really surprised at the number of women (and men who said about their wives) who said that they said they had a miscarriage.

[PlayOnWurtz]

Sorry that should be 8+

[Fanciedachange17]

I've had 2. One at 6 weeks and one at 7 weeks. I knew I was pregnant both times and took tests to confirm it. A little sadness each time but accepted it was natures way of something not being quite right. Went on to have 2 healthy babies although had hyperemesis gravidarum with both which is grim. So bad in fact that if someone had offered me a pill to stop it but which would have killed me I'd have taken it.

[spankhurst]

Very well put, Hetero.
I've had two for certain, and quite possibly more.
Its more common than 1 in 4 women in my experience/acquaintance.

[strawberrypenguin]

I think a lot of women sadly do. As far as I’m aware I never have though (although if not ttc I’m usually on hormonal birth control)

[HargenDarse]

I'm certain Ive not had any miscarriages. Sure my age has something to do with it though, mid 20's.

[MsJuniper]

I'm currently on my 8th pregnancy (14+5) and have 1 DS from my first pregnancy.

My mc have varied between 5-9 weeks and like other posters the two at 9 weeks were nothing like a heavy period. More like a version of labour with several hours of increasing contractions, transition and bearing down. I wish this was talked about more as it was so terrifying the first time.

The other mc weren't so physically difficult but emotionally they still took a toll. I completely agree with Lisa that I'd never compare my losses to a stillbirth but that doesn't mean my own grief is insignificant. I also agree that were it not for early testing, I wouldn't have received treatment from the recurrent miscarriage clinic and would not be in with a shout of having a successful pregnancy now.

I do know lots of other women who've had mc, plus one who had a stillbirth and one who had a tfmr. I can only think of one friend who has had several successful pregnancies with no complications whatsoever. I don't know whether those who had early mc saw a doctor at the time. I would assume the stats are from more than just reported mc though, but the number of mc unknown even to the woman has to be an estimate.

[ElizabethShaw]

I'm guessing a lot of women who have a one off miscarriage before about 8 weeks probably manage it at home without going to the doctor, so would they count in statistics? I can believe that only 1 in 10 women have miscarriages after 8 weeks, but most of the women I know had losses at 5-8 weeks.

[LisaSimpsonsbff]

You can see this if you look at any of the 'anyone else due in...?' threads on antenatal, by the way. You get a tonne of women joining just after a positive test, so mostly at four weeks (as most of those will have been actively trying). You see a sizeable percentage leave the thread saying they've started bleeding before six weeks. Another couple will have miscarriages between six and twelve weeks, and then a few will have MMC discovered at their twelve week scans. But most will have babies. I stupidly posted on one of those threads the first time I found out I was pregnant, and tortured myself by checking recently (due date would be soon) - thread is full of women who got their positives at the same early stage as me and are about to give birth. Of course it's common to lose early, but it's more common to not miscarry.

[LisaSimpsonsbff]

These figures (which someone posted upthread) are from a study in China where they got the women to give a urine sample every single day and used very sensitive lab tests (more sensitive than even the most sensitive commercially available tests) which is why they could tell if they 'miscarried' at three weeks two days. They're therefore surely very accurate, although I've looked at the study and the women were mostly in their 20s so they probably would have got higher rates if they'd included older women who, sadly, have higher miscarriage rates:
spacefem.com/pregnant/mc.php?m=08&d=10&y=12

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Three pregnancies that I know of, two went fine, one ended in miscarriage at about five weeks after my last period. If I hadn't been trying to conceive for so long, I'd have written that off as a bad period. They were very erratic and often painful and it was similar. This was in very early 90s. I tested at just over four weeks and again after the bleeding started and both times were positive. It was sad, but on the other hand:

1. We'd been ttc for nearly two years and this was the first time I'd had a positive result, so first indication that we were both fertile.
   
2. My view was that for something to go wrong so early it must have been non-viable in some way, so better to have that happen as early as possible.
   

I did report it to my doctor, so I suppose it might have ended up in NHS stats.

It's entirely possible I'd had a miscarriage in earlier years but as I wasn't ttc and didn't test except when my period was really, really late (not infrequent, given my cycle was so erratic), I wouldn't have known.

I was pregnant again two months later and the result is now 25.

[MsAwesomeDragon]

I think I've had 2 but can only be sure about one of them.

The first one was when we were trying for dd2, but I didn't test early because my periods are erratic at the best of times. I had a much heavier period than normal with pain that I don't normally get, and had had some pregnancy symptoms in the week before, but I can't be sure it wasn't just a random bad period combined with a bit of a virus.

The second one was much more traumatic and could in no way ever have been mistaken for a period. I was 13 weeks ish but was 2 days before my first scan apt. I had a pregnancy bump and everything (I seemed to show really, really early with that pregnancy). The pain was much much worse than just period pain, there were big clots, and a huge mess. It was massively, massively traumatic, and I couldn't even access the epu while it was happening because it was a bank holiday weekend and it was shut for 3 days. So by the time they opened again it was all over.

When people found out about mine, loads of women told me about theirs too. Tons of my friends and colleagues have had miscarriages but they are very rarely talked about.

[Brokenbiscuit]

Most of the women I know have experienced this. I had never realised how common it was until I experienced it myself and suddenly everyone started sharing their experiences. I was very open about mine, and I guess that's why so many people shared what had happened to them. However, I know other women who prefer not to discuss it, and I guess they will be less aware of how many people have experienced the same thing.

I do think lots of people probably miscarry without noticing it. I had one quite horrible miscarriage that happened when I already knew I was pregnant, and there was no mistaking what was happening, had to go to hospital etc. However, I strongly suspect that a couple of "very heavy periods" that I've had over the years may also have been earlier miscarriages that happened before I even knew I was pregnant - I'll never know.

[falange]

I don’t know anyone who has had one. Or knowingly had one.

[IshouldntcareaboutthisbutIdo]

Yes I think you are probably right and the figure is pretty high and I agree with comment hat early testing is not helpful. Surely if it is earlier on, and no medical intervention is required, then it is better not to know. People feel personal loss at different levels late miscarriages and stillbirth must be horrendous and entirely different from a loss at a few weeks. However, a lost child/hope at any stage is incredibly sad and people have a right to grieve.

[elliejjtiny]

I have 5 living dc, 2 missed miscarriages and at least one chemical pregnancy. I've had a few bad periods that I've sometimes wondered if they were early miscarriages. Then one confirmed early miscarriage at 4+1 which was like a very heavy period. I had a missed miscarriage at 12 weeks when the baby died at 6 weeks. That was really painful, with loads of massive clots. I was in hospital and I honestly thought I was dying at one point. I've had full term labours that have been less painful. I also had a missed miscarriage at 13 weeks when the baby died at 9 weeks. I had a d and c that time so it was physically less traumatic than my natural one. Afterwards my milk came in. There was a body that looked like a baby and the baby was buried with some other miscarried babies in a coffin the size of a shoebox in the baby garden of the crematorium. There is a big difference physically between early losses and later ones but grief is one of those things that can't be measured and we all feel differently.

[BitchQueen90]

I've never had a miscarriage. Only ever had one pregnancy and that was DS.

BUT, I have never spent any time actively trying to get pregnant, DS was a happy mistake (result of me having an upset stomach while on the pill). Apart from the 9 months I was pregnant I have been on some form of contraception ever since I was 17 years old.

I do know quite a few women who have had one, an acquaintance has had 3 over the past 5 years she has been trying for a baby. Very sad.

[MsJuniper]

Ishouldntcare have you also read the comments from those of us who are receiving appropriate treatment precisely because early testing has identified that we have issues remaining pregnant?

[TammySwansonTwo]

I took a test the day my period was missed and really wish I hadn't - it's very long time from 4 weeks to 12 weeks. When I got my first scan at 12 weeks I found out it was twins and I'm so glad I didn't know that earlier as I would have been so anxious. I'm sure I've had two miscarriages but this is the first time I've ever actually tried for a baby and the anxiety is hideous. I'm not sure knowing so early is a good thing, and when I was pg I spoke to lots of American women who'd already had a scan by 8 weeks routinely.

[bananafish81]

Most women I know have had at least one that I know of

I've had 2

My womb is now too damaged to sustain a pregnancy so those pregnancies (both IVF) are as pregnant as I'll ever get. The top miscarriage clinic in the UK confirmed what other Drs have said, that I cannot carry and surrogacy is the only way forward if we want to be parents.

Rainbow babies are a strong part of the miscarriage narrative, unfortunately not everyone gets their rainbow baby

[NannyRed]

I worked in a clinic which had a team of midwives (I am not a midwife). One of the midwifes told me "official statistics say 1 in 4 pregnancies end in miscarriage" the midwife went on to tell me she personally believed the numbers are much higher as some miscarriages take place a day or two either side of the periods due date and are deemed to be "just a weird period this month" and she said she believed up to 50% of pregnancies probably end in miscarriage and nobody even realises it has happened. It seems sad, but the human race still seems to be thriving so I guess nature has its ways.