Sneering on Mumsnet - why so much?

[CaddiesCamping]

Its not funny or clever and just comes across as nasty and ignorant. But there is alot of it on MN (especially AIBU), often with a deeply self-satisfied and self-congratulatory tone! You don't find it on other forums, not even the Daily Mail (so despised by MN, ironically, or is that just sneering again!).

Is it a very British thing I wonder? Or just dull, goady people in general?

This obviously does not apply to the amusing, droll, arch, self-deprecating, wry or witty humour that does occasionally find its way on to MN. Though should add I don't visit AIBU much these days as the good stuff is rare and you have to plough through so much junk.

The advertising sweater ban was FAKE NEWS!

And "pouring vitriol" and "goady" they all tend to mean "you disagree with me and I don't like being disagreed with

No, it means that the person makes attacks on the person, rather than saying they disagree with what they say.

You know like with kids you're meant to criticise bad behaviour rather than the child?

But some MNers take delight in actually attacking people personally and it's not necessary.

As for telling people to go to another forum, do people like the nastiness that can arise on this one? Does it give them an outlet from their home life, or bullying boss or whatever?

Most people on here are women. It just shows how rubbish the perception is that women are the caring, sharing sex. Not a bit of it.

It's not the real world though is it? To quote the New Yorker cartoon - 'on the internet, nobody knows you're a dog' (cartoon of a dog using a computer).

No, it means that the person makes attacks on the person, rather than saying they disagree with what they say.

Not usually- actual personal attacks get removed fairly quickly.

Most of what is described as bigoted, trolling etc is just people having a different opinion.

I have seen sneering on here. It was going on yesterday.

Usually happens if a poster would like some consideration for the fact that having children is not easy.

Ta for the update Stella, I didn't see the thread. Brands are withdrawing from digiital marketing more widely, so maybe MN is taking its share of a wider hit, maybe not. I just thought it funny that this is the reputation MN is gathering. Based on what I share with them, my family certainly think it's a gathering of filthy-mouthed women ('sinking ball deep' into someone being a favourite. The poster bewailing the boyfriend with the unmanageably large penis being another.)

There's a bit of sneering on a thread this morning favour someone who had bit too much wine at a works drinks and is feeling a bit delicate this morning!

There is sneering. But there are dickheads everywhere.

I think there seems to be an issue with it, but in the absence of facial expressions and tone its hard to know. I'm assuming some people think they are being witty but it comes over wrong.

As for telling people to go to another forum, do people like the nastiness that can arise on this one?

I said to go to another forum if you don't like it. I don't like the nastiness no, but I'm aware that moaning about it on the forum is not going to change anything. I mean, what is the actual point of this thread? Nothing's going to change is it? It just gets a bit boring to see these threads all the time.

And yes, I should never have clicked on the thread title

@coconuttella

Please can you explain this acronym?

FOTTFSOFTFO

I try not to sneer. I noticed the "I'm sitting here crying, thanks for making me feel a shit mum, you are such nasty bullies" posters are more common now.

I always think either the internet is not for you or this is an attempt to swing the thread to favour an unreasonable OP. But I try to say perhaps you're not ready to share this on a web forum yet.

Well that was a bit of a hit and run, wasn't it?

ohThisBLoodyCOmputer

Fuck Off To The Far Side Of Fuck Then Fuck Off

normally ending with Some More

OP gone off to find something else to be PO about?

Ooh lovely, have I found the Friday drunk thread?

You're all a load of twats!

Nomen est omen, Bitchfromhell?

I've been a lurker on here for years. Only recently made a couple of posts. Each time I posted I felt like I'd been taken down a peg or two.
Why can't people be more civil on here? I feel like I'm not part of the clique. Dunno whether to bother posting again or just fuck em and ignore.

Sorry I'm late, I was practising sneering and flaring my nostrils, a la Kenneth Williams, in the mirror.

It's a very mn thing. I think the site has two distinct camps - youngish mums who are genuinely posting for support and the old guard whose dcs are now mainly grown, and who've spent the best part of two decades perfecting their 'withering put-downs'. And then of course there are trolls and journalists and randoms...

I never see any sneering. I just see posts complaining about it

^ this

There is sneering. Not sure we can do a lot about it...

Sneering is totally different from being goady though, surely? Sneering is looking down on someone and criticising them just for being who they are/doing what they do.

Being goady, as I understand it, is a more general term to do with deliberately provoking someone.

I don't like either. But then, I am busy cultivating my reputation as 'the thread police'.