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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think this daycare is a bit of a shambles.

17 replies

Elcybeecee · 03/10/2017 21:01

Had my first settling in sessions at my son's daycare today. I've never had any dealing with any daycare before this being my first dc, so not sure if this is the usual experience, especially since they have only opened very recently, but was quite shocked. Firstly went in and they had no idea I was coming that day despite having booked weeks ago, which I thought was understandable, but then the manager brought me through to the baby room without even asking my name. Any other daycare I've looked around I've had to show photo ID to even get in the door, but there was a lot of people arriving at once so let it pass. Then into the baby room, again, any other place I've been to they asked me to take off shoes as babies are all crawling age or under, but again not here.

What shocked me the most though was that the two members of staff in the baby room really didn't look like they were coping well. I was there for an hour and a half in total, with one of the babies inconsolably crying the whole time I was there, only as I was leaving did one of the woman mention that the mother of said baby wasn't back at work yet and should they maybe call her. I felt so sorry for him, they kept putting him down on the floor where he was screaming away, and then kept commenting how he was tired and hadn't slept since 6am that day (I left at 11.30am and he was still crying and awake). I felt like saying do you want me to give you a hand at one point. It then transpired that none of the babies had been napping yet that morning, and I wasn't surprised. The room was bright, they didn't have blankets put on them and there was only a waist high partition between the baby room and the toddler room which was unsurprisingly very noisy. The one baby who wasn't crying that much was just left in the cot for about an hour with one of the two women going over every now and again to turn the mobile on.

AIBU to be thinking again about using this daycare, I'm back to work in a couple of weeks and really don't have many options now, but even in the half hour I left my son down with one of the woman they weren't able to console him. I brought up the fact that they seemed to be understaffed to the manager and her only comment was that they weren't even at maximum capacity babywise. To top it off the front door had been left propped open when I was leaving, so anyone could have walked in!!

Just to add we didn't get to see the daycare before it opened as it was literally being built from scratch but talked to one of the other managers who seemed lovely and really reassured us, so maybe I'm just being naive about how much attention each child is going to get, any other experiences of this kind of thing would be greatly appreciated.

OP posts:

MrsHathaway · 03/10/2017 21:03

Is this in the UK? Ofsted may need a tipoff! Staff ratios are very closely regulated and safety procedures must be watertight.

Autumnleaves7 · 03/10/2017 21:06

Doesn't sound right to me - I've had 2 dc in nurseries for the last 7 years and I've never seen a door propped open, or not been expected when I've done a visit. In fact the one dc2 is at, they do send extra staff into the baby room if a baby is having a particularly bad day - usually mgmt as the others are in their assigned rooms.

Can you start your baby there and whilst searching for an alternative? I know back to work dates and emergency childcare aren't easy to find.

Toomuchocolate · 03/10/2017 21:07

How many babies were there to staff? The only thing I can suggest that's in their favour is that as it's new, all the children are settling in and will be more clingy and unsettled than usual which would be more demanding on the staff. Maybe I'm a few weeks it'll be better .

whyismykid · 03/10/2017 21:09

Follow your instincts - I pulled my son out of a nursery after 4 settling in sessions because he wasn't settling at all and the staff were disinterested and shouty, I managed to find somewhere else by changing working days and my experience at the new nursery was totally different. My son was two and a half at this stage and could communicate with me about what happens at nursery - I'd be very reluctant to leave a baby in the environment you describe - especially as you would think staff would be on their best behaviour when parents are there!

They are new though, so call the nice manager and tell her what you saw, her reaction may help you decide what to do.

Autumnleaves7 · 03/10/2017 21:10

I can't think I've ever seen a baby and toddler room only separated by a partition either. I agree it could be settling in troubles or it could be a team that don't know what they're about - I can't think the mgrs of the nurseries mine have been at would've made these basic security and sleep/noise control mistakes

TeachesOfPeaches · 03/10/2017 21:28

Is this Busy Bees nursery in Charlton? I visited there today and there were boxes everywhere as it only opened last week. The door wasn't working properly either.

Ttbb · 03/10/2017 21:39

That sound horrific. Don't leave your baby in a place like that.

Original poster

Elcybeecee · 03/10/2017 21:49

Only four babies in the room and two women looking after them plus my son so the ratio was fine as they can go up to one staff member to three babies, which was a little worrying considering they aren't even at full capacity. I was prepared to cut them some slack as this place is new so literally every child is settling in but it just seemed like there was a fundamental lack of control of the situation. I've also never ever seen the door to a daycare or creche left open so this really shocked me as I was leaving. I tried emailing the manager but she isn't there this week. I did get a reply with an apology and reassurance that I would be introduced to ds keyworker next session from another member of staff though.

OP posts:

ElizabethShaw · 03/10/2017 21:53

Do you have other options? Have you looked at childminders too?

MrsZippyLake · 03/10/2017 22:03

The nursery sounds terrible; over my dead body would I want to leave my baby/toddler there. It makes me appreciate how well organised and capable the staff at my DD’s nursery were/are. DD recently left to start school and we both cried we were so sad she was leaving. It sounds like you’d be crying for other reasons...

thepatchworkcat · 03/10/2017 22:06

It sounds awful and unsafe if people can just wander in and out. I wouldn't send my child there based on what you've said. Trust your instincts on this one I think.

MammaTJ · 03/10/2017 22:13

I am not a fussy parent, having been 'worn in' by step daughter, then three DC of my own, but I would not be leaving a baby in this environment.

You need to look for other options.

Primaryteach87 · 03/10/2017 22:25

I think the level of care and understanding they are showing of attachment and infant psychology is so horrendous that it couldn't possibly be teething problems. Door issues could be solved but very poor staff is not fixable. Find new childcare.

Brittbugs80 · 03/10/2017 22:35

I've never encountered this in 20 years of working in Nurseries, specifically with under two's.

I'd be on the phone to Ofsted. If Ofsted had shown up that day, they would get an instant fail for the door being propped open.

Why are you still happy for your child to go there? These are mistakes that a nursery shouldn't be making.

Sunshineface123 · 03/10/2017 22:36

Sounds awful, I looked at a few nurseries before finding one which I felt was right for my baby. Funnily enough it was the only one which had a shoes off policy for the baby room. Feel really sad for that poor thing that kept crying. Can you look for a child minder?

Original poster

Elcybeecee · 03/10/2017 23:08

Feel a lot more justified in my concerns reading responses. Dh isn't keen on child minder so only two options are dm has him five days a week instead of two, which is a massive ask and something I'd be really reluctant to do or another daycare. The two I looked at that I really liked have waiting list until at least January so might have to do something temporarily in the meantime. It's so annoying as I thought I had all this sorted and was ready to go back to work but I would hate to go back thinking my child might be crying for hours and not getting settled. He is already hard to get down for naps and super cranky if he doesnt get one, there's no way he could sleep in such a bright/noisy environment. The place was purpose built so I don't know how they made such a massive design flaw.

OP posts:

Autumnleaves7 · 04/10/2017 01:38

January isn't that far for a good nursery - I'd try and cobble something together meanwhile m. You'll never get any work done if you're always wondering if they propped the door open, if ds is crying and being ignored, being good and being ignored etc.

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