I'll try not to drip feed. Have an older child who was young when I got with ex'p. Older child's father is nc through his own choice. Was with exp for roughly 5 years. He lived with us. Turns out he was a bully. He was violent and worst of all mentally abusive and extremely manipulative. But also not very clever of that makes sense. I believe he has some serious anger issues, and is still very child like in his arguments and way of thinking, you can not reason with him. It's almost like he is too stupid to understand reason.
Anyway, he was not nice to my older child, verbally. Eventually I left him when I was pregnant, there was a lot of police involvement.
We have not been together for years, but he is still utterly obsessed with me and what I do.
He lets our child down all the time and will say the most inappropriate things in front of him if he's angry. If he's annoyed with me he will not turn up for contact. I worry about the effect he is going to have on our child long term, emotionally. I feel it's already taking its toll.
He has never had him overnight, he doesn't have a proper home so the most he ever sees him is for a few hours in the day and it's never regular.l, just as and when.
Would it be better to go no contact? My son loves his dad but I honestly worry about him being emotionally scarred and manipulated by him.
Sorry for long post.