Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this is weird

35 replies

Shellsshhh · 27/09/2017 23:07

Senior guy in law firm I work at... He's young and absolutely insanely attractive. Way out of my league, to the point where I don't even consider him a prospect (he's not).

Caught up with him and someone else today, introduced to him for first time. Expressed an interest in getting involved in case they are working on and he suggested catching up - when I asked when would be good, he said either that evening or the next afternoon... Weird?! I said afternoon was ideal and booked time in. Am probably overthinking this as there is definitely a long hours culture but just seemed odd.

How should I have approached it?!

OP posts:
Original poster
Shellsshhh · 27/09/2017 23:08

Only mentioned the looks to underline he is not interested in me in that way.

OP posts:
BlondeB83 · 27/09/2017 23:12

Sounds normal to me.

ZaphodBeeblerox · 27/09/2017 23:16

If your company culture typically involves working till 10-11pm (like many law firms seem to) then perhaps he just meant we can walk down and pick up dinner together and catch up etc? My DP often catches up towards the end of day with both male and female members of the team on things they don't get a chance to talk about during the hectic work day.

Original poster
Shellsshhh · 27/09/2017 23:16

Ok! Just the evening thing? Is that not weird. Most people leave by 6ish. Evenings generally only reserved for urgent work not casual catch-ups.

OP posts:
Original poster
Shellsshhh · 27/09/2017 23:17

Yep do understand that. We are not a team together though so would be one on one initial meeting. Don't know, just made me a bit wary

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 27/09/2017 23:19

Wary of what?

PollyFlint · 27/09/2017 23:19

By 'evening' did he not just mean towards the end of the working day, like 5ish just before you go home? That doesn't sound weird at all to me.

Wondermoomin · 27/09/2017 23:23

No it doesn't sound weird, and it sounds like you're reading too much into it.

ZaphodBeeblerox · 27/09/2017 23:41

Yeah still doesn't sound v weird to me. Depends on workload but end of day is often a good time to do things like get someone up to speed; also he may be thinking he's doing you a favour getting you on board this deal and that it might take a bit of explaining etc.

Even in my very 9 - 4.55 job I'd often want to catch up on longer term projects or things post the peak work hours. And if neither party has kids no one minded staying till 5.30-6 for example to do that.

Original poster
Shellsshhh · 27/09/2017 23:43

Ah bugger. I just felt like something wasn't right! So breezily said ok to afternoon instead, and sent him an invite. Btw i scrub up pretty well and am early 20s, have read back and realise I'm making myself sound pretty hideous. Shouldn't have made such a big thing about his godliness Smile

OP posts:
Original poster
Shellsshhh · 27/09/2017 23:44

Do I look not v keen now?

OP posts:
Ttbb · 27/09/2017 23:51

That's not weird. If he is young and a partner he must have a good work ethic, that is to say he works 24/7 and doesn't have a life, possibly assumes the same of everyone else. Don't flatter yourself, most men are clever enough but to shit where they eat.

WorraLiberty · 27/09/2017 23:56

He gave you a choice and you selected one.

How can that make you look not very keen to get involved in the case? Confused

It doesn't matter how well you scrub up or what either of you look like for that matter.

This is work, not a nightclub.

Wondermoomin · 27/09/2017 23:57

Again, you're overanalysing - and sounding a little unprofessional tbh.

Original poster
Shellsshhh · 27/09/2017 23:57

Don't flatter myself?! Hmm

OP posts:
furlinedsheepskinjacket · 28/09/2017 00:05

is this about work or whether he fancies you?

Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar · 28/09/2017 00:07

What exactly do you think you turned down when you rejected the evening slot in favour of afternoon?

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 28/09/2017 00:12

Was there anything in the way he asked which made you think he was asking you on a date? Is he flirty? Are you both single?

PS ignore the ‘don’t flatter yourself’ type posts, your mistake was not thinking you’re hideous. This doesn’t always go down well for some reason. if you posted saying you have scales all over your body and boils on your face people would be falling over themselves to reassure you of your beauty!

Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar · 28/09/2017 00:16

Op's beauty is only relevant if she assumes he had other plans, rather than updating her on the case she asked to be involved in.
Do I not look very keen now?? Are you actually interested in his work or were you angling for a date?

LonginesPrime · 28/09/2017 00:17

He needs help with his workload and you offered. The sooner he can brief you, the sooner he can stop drowning in work and get back on an even keel. You are going to get beasted. Enjoy!

WorraLiberty · 28/09/2017 00:17

One person told the OP not to flatter herself, which to be fair I think was a bit harsh.

However, the OP is coming across as quite unprofessional, possibly reading something into absolutely nothing and to be frank, if a colleague of mine was talking this way about me, I would feel a little creeped out.

Of course there may be a chance he fancies her, but so far nothing the OP has said has indicated this.

RedBullBlood · 28/09/2017 00:20

Hey, this is MN where posters regularly meet someone 'out of their league' but by page 5 (and after a couple of minor misunderstandings) the op is happily ensconced in Lovegod's mansion and pregnant with triplets.
Crack on, op!

SnipSnipMrBurgess · 28/09/2017 00:45

I don't understand. Are you keen or wary?

Wary of what?

NameChangeFamousFolk · 28/09/2017 01:18

God, a mild crush makes work interesting sometimes. Just be professional and discreet about it.

No OP, I don't think it sounded anything other than just making an arrangement for a case conference or whatever.

He might fancy you, he might not. Crack on with the case and do an excellent job.

oldlaundbooth · 28/09/2017 01:22

So what are you wearing tomorrow OP? GrinðŸ‘