To know how much it costs to raise children?

[smileygrapefruit]

I've googled and seen the statistic is something like £230000 per kid up to age 21. AIBU to think it can be done much, much cheaper than this? At present we only need to use a childminder 10 hours a week as DH and I work opposite times, different days off iyswim, so I appreciate that makes a big difference . We have been given lots of toys/clothes and anything we need to buy I get second hand or in the sales. For birthday/Xmas presents I shop around and keep the budget low (although I appreciate this will increase as children age). I shop in Aldi and asda managing to keep the weekly shop under £80p/w inc nappies etc. Basically the kids really don't cost much at all... yet! We are not rich at all but at the moment living this way we have enough left over to have days/meals out every now and then without worrying. I'd really like to know how much it really costs once they start school, assuming I continue all the above?

YABU The biggest cost of kids is loss of earnings and earning potential! You can't mitigate against that by buying a second hand pram and using hand me downs!

Childcare.
Bills.
Bigger house.
Cars.
Food. More food.
Clothes for a teenager
Driving lessons for a 17 year old.
School trips
Music lessons
Dance lessons
Sports lessons
Pocket money
Holidays
School uniform
Swimming lessons

It depends a lot on loss of earnings such as going PT and what you intend buying your dc. As much as some are happy with homespun I am one of six dc so we really didn't have very much at all.

DS goes to the gym, plays football, eats loads and likes IT equipment, none of its cheap. He is about to build himself a decent PC, at least £1000.

Your lack of holidays abroad is a good example, DS had visited seven different countries and a couple of them a few times by the time he was eight. He sees it as something we just do. As much as it isn't a requirement it's nice obviously.

When these figures have been posted over the years, I have always taken comfort from the fact that dh and I have never earned enough to keep our two alive at those rates, so it clearly has to be possible to do it on less.

Yes, teenagers eat a lot, but they don't need childcare so that's one big expense gone.

Clothes can be handed down for older children and it is perfectly possible to make older children understand that they have to get cheap clothes from Asda or Primark. If the money isn't there, it isn't there. By the time they get to 16, you can always tell them that they have to earn any extras by getting a job: if they won't or can't, then Asda trackies it is.

Not all children go on to university and many of the ones who do cover part of the costs themselves through working at weekends and in the holidays.

Whether you need a bigger car will depend on circumstances: if you live in a town or somewhere with public transport you may not need one at all. We didn't have a car until ours were at junior school and even now it's only available at weekends as I don't drive and dh works a long way off. Dc have grown up knowing that their activities have to be chosen according to what is accessible and ds in particular just walks everywhere.

Yes, they eat more as teenagers, but at the same time dh and I are moving into middle age and eat less. Swings and roundabouts.

I think that you can raise a child quite cheaply if you want to, and also, paradoxically, if you are quite rich.

Reusable nappies, holidays at friends' houses, hand-me-down clothes and toys, parents who have flexible working lives, enough money to buy a large house which is a good investment (not an expense because the money will be recouped), enough savings to pay upfront for good quality and bulk (cheaper in the long term).

Lost earnings

Childcare

Clothes cost hardly anything when they're little and you get lots of gifts, but as they get older, it gets a lot more expensive!

Shoes!!

Food isn't too bad until they get older. My ds is 9 and eats huge amounts! I noticed a massive increase in my food bills, especially in the school holidays.

School trips especially residential ones.

Days out at a theme park won't leave you much change from £200 for a family of four.

A trip to soft play here costs me £25

Cinema for four of us plus snacks is £40-50.

Birthdays and Christmas.

Honestly, it costs a fortune.

All of the senior women at my work either don't have kids, or got promoted BEFORE they had their children. There are some very experienced women there who have zero shot at promotion because they have flexible working contracts, which still cover full time hours!

That alone costs them THOUSANDS a year for a couple of decades which is why I PMSL when posters bleat on about cloth nappies and modest holidays!

Peanut I went all over the world as a child: Thailand, India, Cape Verde to name a few and I can genuinely say I have just as fond memories of our holidays to Scotland; Cornwall and the lake district. Don't get me wrong, we will definitely have some holidays abroad but maybe not every year and we just haven't seen the point yet (eldest has just turned 4).

My 2 teen DS cost a bloody fortune! pocket money, clubs (£100 a month each), plus clothing and shoes ( now adult mens), plus food ( 2 x very hungry adult men), holiday clubs, transport to school, laptops, phone bills, holidays ( now need more than 1 room). School trips/ exchanges cost £1000 each last year alone! Reckon they easily cost me £1000 a month.

formerbabe yes, I can envisage the massive increase in days out etc. And clothes. But I also agree with pp who said they don't have to have expensive stuff. I've never been in to fashion and labels so fingers crossed my DC won't be but if they are then they will be bought as Xmas or birthday presents. I don't spend silly money on designer clothes for myself so won't be for them.

Tinsel I get what you are saying and I suppose that is a huge factor for lots of people but I'm fortunate enough to have established myself a business in which I am earning double what I was in my previous full time job doing between 25-30 hours, I could increase my hours and earnings easily if I wanted to and that's the plan once all kids at school.

TinselTwins, not every woman had the chance of promotion into well-paid jobs: in a sense, you only lose what you would have had a chance of having without children. MN has a very mixed demographic with very mixed earning potential. I was (for various reasons) earning very little before dc were born, so it's hardly bleating to point out that my losses were correspondingly small. Or do you think everybody is bleating who has a different life from you?

I have raised two kids. I never earnt more than £28000.00 a year and mostly less. It must be possible. They had most things they wanted and everything they needed. Holidays were self catering in uk and clothes Primark mainly but of course its cheaper than that. I believe that cost includes education?. Kids are cheap when they are babies a bit more expensive as teenagers but really not that expensive

Cory on these threads people DO "bleat" about how to save on things that are not what the main costs of kids consists of, whatever your budget range! Cloth nappies give you a small saving for a small amount of time and don't make a dent in the real costs of having kids.

it's all tips on how to save on luxuries and extras and it gets yawnsome as it doesn't get to the crux of the matter. The essentials expenses and loses.

Ok tinsel, that's kind of exactly what I'm wanting to know. How much do the essentials cost? The whole earning potential argument isn't relevant to me.

Hhm. Even before food and clothes etc...i work part time. That's 16k a year less. Plus childcare for 2 children 3 days a week is 11k a year. So that's 27k worse off a year before buying them a single nappy.

Don't forget that a good part of the money it costs is borne by the state, too.

It's not all a direct cost against the parents.

Food costs us a fortune. We're a family of four but it out groceries aren't 2 x our grocery budget from when we were just a couple/family of two, it's closer to tripple. Utilities are up, when we moved for work we couldn't initially rent a cheap studio etc.

Shelley I think the articles I was reading were about how much it cost the parents. Although I suppose some of that is through benefits? I only get child benefit.

We moved from a 1-bed flat to a 2-bed. It cost about £100k and that’s spread over the same amount of time it’ll take to raise the kids.

Unless you use private schools and private heakthcare etc, you don't only get CB

Not helpful but I find it's best to not think about it! It can bring you out in a rash! My db hasn't got kids yet so we're still benefiting from a very generous uncle who worships dc and very generous dgp that don't have their resources split! Kids are v lucky! Dreading that gravy train ending! (Obviously v lighthearted)!

I've never been in to fashion and labels so fingers crossed my DC won't be but if they are then they will be bought as Xmas or birthday presents. I don't spend silly money on designer clothes for myself so won't be for them.

Ditto, but ime it's not about designer clothes. For example, they trip up in the playground and get holes in the knees of their tights/school trousers. You buy them a pair of shoes but they drag their feet against the pavement and the sole comes loose. There's a dressing up day at school so you buy a couple of bits online for it. They lose their hats, scarfs, gloves etc. These things really add up!

Tinsel you seem intent on having an argument. The thread, and articles I am referring to, are about how much children cost to the parents!

Hand me downs are great for newborns, but older children wear clothes out so they don't get lawbreaking so much. Our biggest clothing costs are shoes (school shoes, sport shoes, wellies , summer shoes), hobby kit (brownies etc), and uniform (there's not as much good quality logo ed kit for sale second hand as M N would have you believe, plus most of it like blouses and socks need to be new.

For teens I get them to manage their own "fashion" clothes buying, its the essentials that cost more though.

I've never been in to fashion and labels so fingers crossed my DC won't be but if they are then they will be bought as Xmas or birthday presents. I don't spend silly money on designer clothes for myself so won't be for them.

I don't really buy myself much ever but I can't understand this attitude personally. I know I'll get flamed and I know it's not alway financially viable but I would always want to give my children whatever I could. It might be silly to grown ups but not to the kids with the 'wrong' trainers in the school yard.