Having the ‘sex talk’ with teens

[Bearwithverylittlebrain]

I’ve just made my DS (14) cringe with embarrassment by talking about keeping himself safe if he is intending to have sex with his girlfriend. For context, I am not in any way suggesting he is having sex but the massive love bite on his neck indicates that he and his girlfriend have passed the stage of just holding hands.

He went a delightful shade of pink when I said that it is his responsibility to use a condom to protect them both from unwanted pregnancy (and STD’s) even if she says she is on the pill. I even said that if he was too embarrassed to buy condoms, I will get them for him.

I also let him know that it is illegal for him to have sex as he is under age.

Despite his discomfort, he did say thank you, and then said he would rather talk to me than his dad “as that would be soooo cringy”.

My DP (not my DS’s dad) has said that I should not have offered to buy him condoms as I am then encouraging him to have sex.

So who is right, me or DP?

As for buying condoms, I always told my kids that if they are too immature to buy condoms themselves, that tells them they are too immature to have sex and deal with the possible consequences.

As pigs said. And luckily mine have been used to age appropriate chats, so not embarrassing at all. If you don't explain things, they will latch on to rumour and bollocks. We are able to discuss a myriad of topics without embarrassment purely by being open and honest. It creates trust IME

Holy lord. Teenagers don't have sex because you give them condoms. Such ridiculous simplistic thinking. I remember going to FPC after a year or so with my bf as I was scared I was pg (despite condoms and the pill) - my mum found out and assumed I'd gone there for condoms because I was about to start having sex. She had no idea - definitely don't want to be blindsided like that with my twins.