Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be really disappointed with this?

37 replies

Fannylodger · 26/09/2017 15:15

Hi,
A friend who's recently started out in carpentry (qualified/1yrs experience) offered to make me a piece of furniture.
He initially quoted me $300 but in the end materials alone have run to $820 I still haven't paid him for his time, either but he's left this amount up to me to decide. I don't know what to do over that.
Initially the quote all in was $300 but then after buying the first lot of materials he needed more and I said buy what you need and I'll cover it he did so sent me receipts and invoice which I paid this was another $100 I thought well mistakes happen and then it happened several more times and I didn't feel I could say no, the work was taking a while (should've been a fortnight max and it's only just been completed after 3 months) and to be honest I saw no point in souring our friendship, wasting the initial outlay and leaving him with an unfinished piece of furniture. So I've persevered.
The thing is though, is that the work isn't really up to scratch.
Part of it is attached incorrectly(which to his credit is the only part he's said he'll put right) , some of it is different colours and patchy where it's been varnished badly or hasn't had enough layers. Structurally it's amazing and strong but honestly, it looks like shit. But he's raving about it like it's an amazing piece of work and honestly in the past I have done better work (basic, but didn't look shit) and I'm in no way experienced or qualified - and have difficulties with some flatpack furniture.
Given the amount I've spent on it I really don't think it's worth it to be honest Sad especially as I'll now be expected to fork out for his time.
For reference a non mates rates piece made of the same materials including the fee for their time would likely run to about $1000. Up to 2.5 for a very experienced person.

I'll give him something because he did work on it however shit but I'm not sure how much to give and what to do now.
I could've bought something from a store for under half the price and been happy with it, or gone to Bunnings myself and got the things required and made it myself for less. It would've been weaker structurally (it's well made in that regard I'll give him that) but looked better for less. There's been a lot of waste. For example bits that aren't seen (the inside) are varnished very thoroughly but parts of it on display are patchy and he's gone through a lot of expensive varnish... I'm also not sure that all of the materials I bought were actually used on this piece, but I'm not sure I have much of a way to prove that.

Aibu to be really disappointed?
I'm terrible at confrontation so will probably end up saying nothing, giving him a few hundred, chucking it out and going to IKEA instead.

OP posts:
Original poster
Fannylodger · 26/09/2017 15:16

Goodness me that was long...

OP posts:
ButDoYouAvocado · 26/09/2017 15:18

Lets see it then :-)

Redglitter · 26/09/2017 15:19

I'd have to say something, for both your sakes. For one thing why should you pay for something that's poorly made? If he wasn't a friend I bet you'd have no qualms. He needs to know his work is poor. His next paying customer won't be shy in telling him I bet.

You need to tell him you're not happy and why

Original poster
Fannylodger · 26/09/2017 15:20

Nice try avocado Wink
I'm trying not to out myself. I won't then post a photo of it. Grin

OP posts:
Original poster
Fannylodger · 26/09/2017 15:21

Red glitter
Im terrible at confrontation/being blunt... any idea how to go about that? Text/call/pop over? Wait until he comes to sort out the incorrectly attached part?

OP posts:
Redglitter · 26/09/2017 15:23

Assuming from your use of $ you're in the US do you really think it's likely you'll be outed by posting a photo on a predominantly UK site?? Have that many people seen this disaster that you'll be recognised?

Original poster
Fannylodger · 26/09/2017 15:23

I'd rather not risk it, to be honest.
Because I'm a wimp.
I'm not in the US though (but you're right, no longer in UK).

OP posts:
fuzzywuzzy · 26/09/2017 15:24

I'd tell him it's not what you wanted. And tell him to keep it and sell it on.... I would not be giving him loads of money for something I'd be throwing out.

Redglitter · 26/09/2017 15:24

I'd call him and say I needed to speak to him about the unit there's a few things you're not happy with and have him come over. It doesn't have to be confrontational Smile

You're really doing him a favour in the long term by telling him

Original poster
Fannylodger · 26/09/2017 15:25

I've already got it, now. It's in my garage (not using it, but it was brought over this week.)
I don't think anyone would buy this for a half decent price to be honest, but I guess it wouldn't be my problem then... good idea.

OP posts:
blahdyblahblah · 26/09/2017 15:29

What you've put is outing enough without a picture.

Therefore, picture please. Grin

ChicRock · 26/09/2017 15:30

I would message him...

"hey friend, I've just added up what I've paid you so far for xxx(the item) and I've realised it has totalled £820. As you initially quoted £300 I'm now massively over budget and I can't pay you any more money for your time. So I'll totally understand if you'd rather now reimburse me the £820 for materials and collect the item to sell it on".

Fantasticmissfoxy · 26/09/2017 15:32

Oh gosh that's an awkward one - sounds like the item is well below scratch though, as suggested above I'd have him over and point out the bits you're not happy with

Fantasticmissfoxy · 26/09/2017 15:32

Chicrock's response is perfect

Original poster
Fannylodger · 26/09/2017 15:33

its not already outing enough, I'm not posting a photo, sorry.

I'm a chicken shit, so text may be the way to go to be honest. I did try to say something in person when he brought it around but mostly bottled it.

OP posts:
Mummyoflittledragon · 26/09/2017 15:33

How much would the materials have cost had he not made mistakes?

How much do you value this friendship?

Original poster
Fannylodger · 26/09/2017 15:37

About $300, providing no mess ups and materials used appropriately (and not wasted as per example in OP) but that is at retail prices as I don't have access to discounted trade goods. I understand something may have run over and that in itself (the under quoting) isn't really an issue it's the extent I was under quoted and the fact it looks shit. I value the friendship a lot

OP posts:
Cavender · 26/09/2017 15:39

Oh dear, that’s both awkward and disappointing. He’s going to want to use you as a reference too isn’t he.

I don’t know what to suggest, I guess you’ll feel obligated to pay him something but resentful as it’s good money after bad. Sad

By the way Redglitter I’m posting from the USA, there are loads of MNers in America, Australia and all round the world. Being in a different country is no guarantee that you won’t out yourself.

Redglitter · 26/09/2017 15:41

Yes I know there are posters worldwide but as I said it's predominantly a UK site Smile

ChicRock · 26/09/2017 15:43

Hmmm I'm not sure he values the friendship as much as you do.

Can you imagine quoting a friend £300 for something, fleecing them for an additional £520, and then still expecting more money for your time?

Mummyoflittledragon · 26/09/2017 15:44

The thing is, you gave them permission to continue buying materials. Ideally they would have paid for their mistakes, but they didn't and that was by agreement. I'd probably wince, swallow a lot and pay the bill if the friendship means a lot and take it as a lesson learnt. The other alternative is to say. "Friend, what you've made is not as I expected, I can see errors and don't want to pay the full amount." However, I think the friendship will suffer.

Bottom line, what would you rather be healthier, your bank balance or your friendship?

MoiraRosesMeltdown · 26/09/2017 15:52

You are considering your friend's feelings in a way that yous haven't been. Have they apologised for the extra costs, delays and the look of the final piece?

user1492958275 · 26/09/2017 15:55

Are you sure he's not had you on a bit?

To go 3x over budget, 3x over estimated build time AND still not have a perfect piece is just ridiculous.

I'm thinking you may value your friendship with him, more than he does with you.

I think you've been conned! Don't give him any more money.

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 26/09/2017 16:16

I know where you are, and I can guess what he's built (although I could well be wrong), but I won't say.

However, I wouldn't dump the whole thing, that would be a fearsome waste of what you've already spent.
Make him come and make good the bit that's not attached correctly and then pay him whatever you think will maintain your friendship without causing you massive resentment.

Do you think that you can fix the varnish issues yourself? If so, save yourself the pain of getting him to do it - first ask him if there is any varnish leftover for "touch up" work (since you've paid for it, you have a right to get it off him, I think!) and then see if you can make it look better.

I'm sorry you've had this experience - it's not always a good idea to put work a friend's way, unless you're certain they're up to the job! We had bathroom floor tiles put in by the husband of a friend of MIL's, who was just starting out - instead of sloping towards the drain in the middle of the floor, like they're supposed to, they all slope to the outside wall of the house - not much use, really!! Never again.

KurriKurri · 26/09/2017 16:26

Is anyone else picturing Joey's 'Entertainment Unit' from Friends ? Grin