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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Aibu to send cleaning lady an angry email?

49 replies

irp1978 · 26/09/2017 09:40

Had a new cleaner come over yesterday for 2 hours (apparently). I went out when she arrived with my 2 small children, one of which likes to throw tantrum every now and again. I was really looking forward to coming home to a nice clean house, i had visions of opening the front door to wafts of polish, bleach and zoflora! But the reality was i opened the door to....nothing. Nothing had really changed. The floor hadn't been mopped, the bathroom looked pretty much the same, i could feel crumbs underfoot etc, etc..

So obviously i won't be using her again. But the problem i have is i feel robbed. I left money out for 2 hours work, she may have done 40 mins max. She abused my trust and good nature. Normally i would just leave it, but i feel pretty upset that someone came into my home who i trusted to do a job for me and paid well just f*ed off as soon as i left! When i first met her i said i was finding things hard with 2 small children and needed help!

So I'm now debating wether to send her an angry email and basically tell her she's committed theft! I'm not a confrontational person so am finding this a bit hard..😬

OP posts:

titchy · 26/09/2017 10:27

To be honest you shoudl have stayed in to supervise, the first time at least.

1DAD2KIDS · 26/09/2017 10:29

Don't waste your energy on it, you have enough on with two small kids. I say either do nothing or start proceedings though small claims (if you think you could prove the cleaner fell below what was contracted).

Was the cleaner from a trusted/verified source?

SandyDenny · 26/09/2017 10:29

Email and ask if evetything was Ok and ask her how she found it, what was she able to get done, general questions and then decide what to do based on her answers (if you get any)

guilty100 · 26/09/2017 10:29

I take it back, your expectations sound really reasonable. If your sole expectations were that she'd hoover downstairs, clean the kitchen floor, and clean a couple of bathrooms, and none of that had been done, then it's time to try another cleaner!

AudacityJones · 26/09/2017 10:31

Yeah I take back my post too, your expectations sound reasonable. Do try another cleaner preferably with word of mouth reco? And definitely stay to supervise! Sorry, I can imagine how frustrating it is.

Original poster

irp1978 · 26/09/2017 10:40

Thanks, I'm now starting to realise that i should have stayed and monitored first visit. When i first met her she went on about her experience etc so i thought wow, you are my answer! Also with 2 small children one of which gets quite excited with visitors i didn't want to get in her way, i felt if i wasn't there She would do it properly and not feel rushed. Maybe i need to grow a bigger pair and be a bit more demanding perhaps. Oh well, something that was supposed to make my life easier has failed miserably 😭😀

OP posts:

FizzyGreenWater · 26/09/2017 10:58

Ask her to come again. Go out... and then come back ten minutes later. Or better still, hide round the corner and watch to see just how quickly she tries to leave!

AhNowTed · 26/09/2017 10:59

Ah there's piss takers everywhere.

My former ironing lady (do it myself now) was looking for a cleaning job so I put her in touch with a good friend.

She actually had the gall to say to me how she did the minimum and sprayed a bit of polish around

RidingWindhorses · 26/09/2017 11:00

You just need to find a better cleaner. There many people out there looking for cleaning work.

Original poster

irp1978 · 26/09/2017 11:04

Fizzy - i might just try that 😂

Oh hello have you forgotten something? Then why are you leaving after 10 minutes😀

OP posts:

Original poster

irp1978 · 26/09/2017 11:11

Ah now, that's really taking the piss!

There are good cleaners out there but they're hard to find and normally fully booked.

It's just so bloody time consuming looking for one and then having to monitor their work! Maybe I'm too trusting but i like to give people the benefit of the doubt before i start breathing down their necks saying 'you missed a bit' that's not my style.

OP posts:

FizzyGreenWater · 26/09/2017 11:11

Oh yes. You pop out from behind the hedge.

'Oh! Right, the state of my house last time now makes sense!'

You slide quickly into the passenger seat. 'I'll take this envelope back then, shall I? And perhaps you have last week's still in your purse, if you'd like to return that too? Or shall I accompany you home to get it?'

(you wouldn't actually do that of course but )

Coconutspongexo · 26/09/2017 11:12

You don't half feel sorry for yourself OP

'Back to me doing it all' lots of people do all their own cleaning

Original poster

irp1978 · 26/09/2017 11:18

Fizzy- ha ha, i would but i bet this weeks wages are loooong gone!

Dipping-yes i am feeling sorry for myself, i hope to shrug it off soon and get back to normal asap, now where's that bog brush...

OP posts:

hannah1992 · 26/09/2017 11:22

Cleaning in my house for two hours (large 3 bedroom) none stop I could make beds, quick clean of bathroom, wash pots, quick clean of kitchen (wipe surfaces cupboard doors wash up out away), hoover upstairs and down and mop floors. So just a basic clean. That is providing that everything is tidy so no toys to have to pick up and out away no paperwork etc out on the sides. Depends how big the house is and what you expected her to do.

Viviennemary · 26/09/2017 11:22

I see that you did give her a detailed list and she ignored it. This isn't good. But two hours once a week isn't very long at all. Once a fortnight for four hours would probably be better.

Bitsandbobsalot · 26/09/2017 11:25

I'm a cleaner ( and a very good one at that 😜)
Yanbu.
First time cleans are about establishing what needs doing and impressing the client.
Sometimes it can take a couple of sessions to get on top of things but your home doesn't sound huge and if it's not dirty then you should of being able to tell the cleaner had been especially in two hours.
For me mopping,hoovering polishing and cleaning bathrooms and kitchens are basics so that most definitely should of been done imo.
If I have time after those things to fill the time and so the client gets the most out of there money I move on to skirting, cookers,fridges, windows. Insides of bins or cupboards or doing the ironing. I've even shampooed carpets and washed net blinds.

The way I like to do it is I offer a first clean that would include all extras might take two hours might take eight. Then a hourly rate after to do the basics with extra jobs added in.
I also wouldn't be put off if you and your children were home. I have a communication book that if the client isn't home and they want something particular doing or they weren't happy about something they can communicate it to me in there so I can fix it asap and sign it off. So maybe if you don't want to be home while a cleaner is in you could do that.

I wouldn't bother with this cleaner again as she obviously isn't up to your standards but please don't let it put you off as there are lots of good and hard working cleaners out there.

guilty100 · 26/09/2017 11:29

I think, OP, that as with anything in life it's sadly not as simple as just ringing someone up, booking them and - tada- problem solved. Maybe it should be, but in these cases there's always monitoring, admin, and things to handle. Don't let it get you down, though - a bit of work now to find a really good cleaner will eventually give you that help in the future.

Hekabe · 26/09/2017 11:29

Bitandbobs can you come to my house please? You sound amazing.

Original poster

irp1978 · 26/09/2017 11:36

Bits and bobs - you sound amazing. Thanks for your advice 😀

OP posts:

bianglala · 26/09/2017 11:42

Since she is not trustworthy are you sure nothing is missing?

Original poster

irp1978 · 26/09/2017 11:53

Biangala - i did wonder that, haven't noticed anything as yet...

OP posts:

blackteasplease · 26/09/2017 12:39

I need alot from my cleaner as work full time (plus some) as does stbxh. We have two kids 3 and 8.

We need to pay properly for the cleaning we require - a reputable cleaning company that has their workers as employees (i.e. Not an agency masquerading as a company). Two cleaners come for 3 hours every 2 weeks. It is pricey but it's what we need - it would unrealistic to try live in the house we do, both work ft and have two kids without this.

If someone is off sick or busy or whatever they send someone else.

It took years to convince stbxh of this but sadly we didnt get to it in time to save our relationship.

A solo cleaner with her own kids and a busy life was not the person we needed.

Mittens1969 · 26/09/2017 12:55

I have a cleaner, she does a great job; I hired her through Care.com. She does 3 hours every 2 weeks at £12 an hour. It's not enough time for her to do everything but she doesn't need to do every room on each visit.

I'm sorry you had such a bad experience. Don't let it put you off, but you would be better off staying around the first time they're in your house.

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