To only take two months off work?

[mollifly]

I am currently 11 weeks pregnant and I am starting to think about maternity leave.

My maternity leave package is not great, 4 weeks full pay, 2 weeks half then down to statutory.

Depends on you and your baby. A friend went back after 8 weeks with her first and then a year with her second. She found going back after her second much much harder, as she had lost so much confidence.

there is a theory that the first few weeks/months are baby adjusting to outside world and they mostly sleep ( if your lucky) they just wake up at funy times, two months will go in a flash.

In the UK it's expected the mother takes a whole year off. In many other countries, much shorter mat leaves and/or shared leaves are common. Go back when you feel like it.

there is a theory that the first few weeks/months are baby adjusting to outside world and they mostly sleep

😂😂😂 My DD did not get that memo.

It looks as though they are offering you occupatonal maternity pay which is additional to statutory maternity pay. Although it's worth checking your maternity policy to clarify.

I'm taking a full year (I have savings) and couldn't imagine going back any sooner. 8 weeks is gone in the blink of an eye so you may regret it, but you may not, no one can say for sure. I would perhaps plan for a longer maternity leave and see how you feel after the birth. If after the birth you would like to return sooner you should just be able to give notice to your work when you'd like to return. My work require 8 weeks notice to return before my maternity ends, so you'd need to check what notice you have to give.

I think it depends on your work, and also childcare arrangements.
If you work fairly short hours with a short and easy commute; if you basically enjoy the job and don't find it too stressful; if there is a bit of flexibility in your hours; if you have convenient childcare and partner who does his fair share then it will be fine. Long hours in a stressful job with little support will not be fine.

I started a new job as a university lecturer when my daughter was 2.5 months old. I got no maternity pay as I was a student before but that wasn't really the issue, it was more that I didn't have much choice about when the job started. I did warn them that I wouldn't really be working full hours for the first month. Nurseries don't take babies until 3-4 months old. I worked mornings in the department and afternoons/evenings at home. My partner did the opposite. Then from 4.5 months my daughter was in nursery half days and my partner and I shared the afternoons. We did a lot of catching up work in the evenings. It was pretty tough but at the time seemed like the right balance for us between keeping work going and time spent with our daughter. Sometimes I think I would have liked to have had a little more time at home (and I did with my second as a got 6 months maternity leave) but to be honest I'm not really a baby person and enjoyed being someone other than I mother. The brilliant thing about it was that from the start my DH was an equal parent and remains that way.

If my DH had been working long inflexible hours then it wouldn't have worked for us and I wouldn't have done it.

2 months is very short for a first baby. I took 3 months with my first, luckily, as I was very ill with infections till about 8 weeks. Then 6 weeks with my second and 4 weeks with my 3rd. I'll take 4 weeks with my 4th due next year. But I work from home with a full time nanny so I can still see the kids and baby when needed and I will continue to feed the baby for s few more weeks before switching to combination. I'd say you need 3 months if you go out to work but it is doable.

If you take maternity leave two weeks from due and baby is late (they often are) then the first 3 weeks of your months will be without baby even making an appearance.

My DD was 7 weeks before she slept 5 hours at night and I didn't stop bleeding until nearly eight weeks.

I had 11months, my sister six months, I wouldn't consider less than six.

Oh and I had a c-section and had to stay in hospital for a week due to complications.

Contrary to what other posters have said, it is very difficult for a childminder to look after a baby younger than 6 months old
I have never ever come across a CM who wouldn't be delighted to take on a tiny baby under 6 months.

Pokemon I think your post is wonderfully supportive and reassuring to the OP, whatever she decides to do. You are absolutely right that with the right childcare in place, op's baby can flourish. Women worry so much that they're damaging their child in some way by going back to work - whether it's after 8 weeks or 8 months. It can and does work and many don't have a choice.

But I don't think mn is 'against' short maternity leave per se, rather that the majority of those who have been on mat leave are speaking about their own experience. And generally their own experience is that a longer maternity leave is preferential to a short one. There is no blame or guilting mothers who want to/ have to have a short maternity leave, just sharing experiences and trying to prepare the op for the emotional and practical aspects. Despite taking 9 months for my first I had completely underestimated the emotional impact of returning to work. I am more prepared this time with the benefit of having already done it once.

Lol, why can't a childminder manage! Little tiny babies are easier than anything usually.

It depends how you feel when the baby's here but you can't predict that.

I had an awful labour, an EMCS, and a baby who didn't sleep for more than an hour for 7 months!

I couldn't have gone back to work before 6 months.

Echo others who suggest childcare for such a young baby will be tricky to find. At least it would be in my area.

2 months is very short. Blink, and you baby will be at high school.

You (plural) are still likely to be up several times in the night at 2 months, however the baby is fed.

After my second child, I couldn't even stand up straight for 9 weeks!

Also, my DC's nursery did not take babies younger than 3 months.

Having says all that, I was well supported through my pregnancies by my employer. I took 12 months ml both times - a combination of enhanced mat pay, statutory and annual leave.

Many senior people in my industry take the minimum which is 12 weeks. But they tend to have access to great childcare options. If you need to return to work then do it - being a stahm is only an option when you can afford it.

2 mths is nothing. You will want the most you can as far as possible. Look at your outgoings and cut them right down now.

Only buy the min necessary for baby (honestly you will be given loads and if you send the message you are happy with second hand pram/cot/etc then you will also be inundated) All they need to start with is babygros a cardi or two and nappies. I would also get some muslin cloths as well. Try hard to breastfeed rather than formula (remember its free).

Also remember when you go back you will have care costs which for a tiny baby will be higher. So Your costs go down - no work coffees and sandwiches, no travel no clothes etc you will be suprised. So if you can manage 6 mths it will be cheaper on childcare bills long run.

@scottishdiem patronising & rude . OP is typing a quick response, most likely on a phone ... Not a letter to the Queen. You can't judge her work performance from that.

Oh and annual leave work out if you can add some of that at the end - remember you still earn it when you are off as well. I used mine to basically go back prt time even after 11 mths

I wonder if you are underestimating how long it can take to recover. I had waterbirths each time however 8 weeks after I was still sore and bleeding, my milk was still really leaking and boobs were massively swollen. I was also an emotional wreck about the birth, the first few weeks baby slept but around 5 weeks the waking through the night started and by all accounts I've been lucky with how mine sleep compared to others. We are at 9 months (I'm not going back to work) but I'd say I'm in enough of a routine that I could easily and would have been able to for the last couple of months. However yes I would have massively regretted it, to give you an idea at 8 months baby is just starting to say a few words, standing independently and nearly taking a few steps, she's starting to respond to games like peek-a-bo etc. Lots of my friends aren't baby people as wouldn't of minded missing the baby period so it really depends on you however don't underestimate your own healing time and flood of hormones that really screw you. Also where we live under 1s are more expensive for nursery care than over so check out nursery costs. Also check if you are allowed to change your mind, with my work you can give a preliminary date and then change the return date when you've had baby.

You definitely need to go back to your HR department and ask what the hell they're on about (more politely). What you're saying they pay is less than the government-mandated minimum. That can't be right. Ask how it fits in with SMP.

Different for me as I’m self employed but I started doing some work at home at 3mo when ds was with his dad (weekends and evenings). Then I did 3 short (6hr) days a week from 6mo.
I wouldn’t have liked to work any sooner than the 12 weeks but I’m also glad I didn’t take a whole year totally off, I found the balance of working about half time better for us all (I felt enthusiastic about work after days with ds and really enthusiastic about days with ds after days away from him).

I was overseas where the maternity leave is paid by your employer and is limited to six weeks, generally from the day you give birth (small island so never far from the hospital). If you don't stay for a year after you return, you have to pay the six weeks back on a pro rata basis.

Ex H left while I was pregnant so I absolutely had to get back to work. I tacked two weeks of holiday onto the six weeks - and it was fine, partly because everyone else did the same and I'd have been regarded as a precious expat if I'd taken longer. I worked the year then left and took some time out before starting my next job.

DD is nearly 20 and we have a lovely relationship. As my grandmother used to say, needs must when the devil drives.

I went back after 5 weeks my daughter is now 9 weeks old. We're not in a position for me to be a sahm again so I went back. Fortunately we can work around each other so my two kids are either with me or my OH their dad. I work 4 days a week and those days are early shifts and my kids sleep in till about 10 so I only miss about 3/4 hours with them. If I'm honest I enjoy it I don't feel like I miss out on too much and they are with there dad so he gets to watch them grow up too also I get to have a break which works wonders for my mental health. My daughter's a normal baby sleepless nights colic etc. But I manage great but saying all this if she was my first there's no way I would have managed (had 2.5 years with first) it was a huge shock to the system the lifestyle change but this time round I'm way more prepared/used to it. I had a straight forward birth and felt fine to go back but I would advise saying for complications. It would be a nightmare having to go back if you wasn't ready best of luck x

Another one here who took 3 months... this was the norm 20 or so years ago and of my friends who had their babies around the same time, those who went back to work all returned when their baby was about 3 months.

This may sound odd but in some ways it was easier- no separation anxiety, no feeling of being out of the loop with work. It felt more like having an extended holiday, whereas I think if I'd had a whole year I'd have felt as though I'd started a completely different life and the transition back into work would have been harder. Also, I've seen a number of friends having babies recently who've children have taken quite a while to settle in childcare because they start being left at around 10/11 months when anxiety peaks.

On the downside, only having a few months is physically tougher. Your baby is unlikely to be sleeping through and it takes serious commitment and pumping to keep bf going.

Imo the key thing is that very short ML isn't the norm now. When it was, it was just what we all did- it was basically either that, or relinquish your work life. When it's what your friends are all doing it feels much easier. You may find it very hard to be leaving a 2 month old when it's no longer the norm.

Could you compromise and take, say 6 months? I did that with my subsequent babies as legislation had extended paid leave to 6 months by then. In my mind that was the ideal- long enough but not too long to feel completely out of the loop, and no problems settling the babies in childcare

It's not so long since maternity leave was 18 weeks, and yes it is perfectly possible to back to work after a couple of months.

But you need to plan and allow for contingencies.

The main one being getting your childcare sorted out as early as you can (probably before the baby is born). Also look at how much it costs, because your total family income on stat mat pay might be higher than residual family income on pay after additional expenses. In which case going back at and end of stat pay makes more sense.

The other contingency is in case of medical need, in either you or the baby. But you don't have to set your return date with your employer until after the birth, even if you have discussed it in principle beforehand.