To not allow my dc to choose how to decorate their room?

[rosybell]

DH think IABU to not want our ds to choose his own room decor. DS is 6 and obsessed with Star Wars/villains etc and wants to paint his room red and black. I have tried compromising with him- e.g. 2 red walls and 2 grey. He won't consider this. Have also agreed to get him a big Star Wars canvas etc.

I had brought a lovely pale nautical blue to paint it and was going to put a cool world map mural up as well as his Star Wars poster.

He is adamant he wants it red and black. He won't really compromise or consider other options.

The room is dated and needs redecorating and Dh thinks we need to let him choose as it's his space, which I kind of understand I guess. But I also think we are Paying for it and doing all the work? Not sure if iabu?

Thanks all you have helped give me perspective! He loves Darth Maul hence the red and black theme. Also thank you to who mentioned the photo wall website, great ideas on there.

If you've asked him what he wants, it's pretty mean not to then let him have something at least close to that. At six, I'm not sure I would have asked, tbh. Or at least given only two or three options he could pick from.

I get that kids should have some say, but I won't be letting my dc have their room painted black for any reason. I'll paper it, let them look through colour schemes we can compromise on, but black? Nope.

I had a red room once. My god that was so difficult to cover. It was like a blood red and took about 4coats of white to get it back to looking decent again.

Why did you ask him what he wanted if you had already bought the paint?

Where you expecting a six year old to ask for tasteful neutrals with an educational theme?

You say that you "will be paying for it" and that he "isn't open to negotiations" - you seem to think you should get final say. And since you feel like that, your choices are:

1. Let him choose
2. Tell him he will have what he's given, and you didn't mean it when you asked his opinion.

But trying to get him to pretend that he wants what you want is a bit unfair, really.

I'd let him have it his way, but involve him in achieving it e.g. painting the skirting boards, masking the red areas etc. Also let him know it won't get painted again for at least 3 years, so he needs to be sure he wants it that way. He will love you for ever, if you do this.

I wish my mum had let me have the colors I wanted at ANY age.

I wouldn't be painting a room black and red. Yes, I would let him have his Star Wars theme, but I would do it by accessorising a neutral base colour. Buy Star Wars curtains, bed spreads, lamps, rugs etc.

Consider using red and black wall sized material and pinning it as wall coverings

I wouldnt because its a pain in the backside if you want to sell the house! Plus he might easily get bored! When mine we little, we ended up with a subtle colour on the wall - very pale blue (DS1) very pale yellow (DS2) and very pale pink (DD) then they jazzed it up with posters and bedding of whatever they were 'into' at the time. Much easier than changing the paint every time they change their 'favourite thing ever'

A good base coat and it’s easy to cover don’t worry. It’s really not a big deal.

I love this one, and it’s an awful lot easier to change when it needs redoing than black walls www.homewallmurals.co.uk/star-wars-the-force-awakens-paper-wallpaper-5313-p.asp

My Mum and Dad let me (and my brother) decorate our rooms how we wanted, within reason, which was cost related. However, they made it clear that it was our choice and that meant we had to live with the consequences, which was, we might hate it, but it would have to stay like that for a while (a few years). I had dark purple on the ceiling and two walls, with lilac on the other. It did make for a dark bedroom, but it also made it very much 'my' space, which I did appreciate, even at 9. I think encouraging children to make their room more imaginative and a space which reflects their interests is a wonderful to do.

I totally agree with letting him have what he wants except: red is a very unrelaxing colour to have in a bedroom and I speak as one who knows.

Had F & B Eating Room Red in our dining room, looked nice for a couple of years and then got fed up with it. Used Crown Basecoat over it and then re-painted with Dulux Egyptian Cotton. Basecoat is fabulous.

I would do one wall red (where his headboard would be, maybe) or maybe one wall of a black/red stripes. and the rest dark grey. He will get tired of looking at black and red. Just paint whatever you feel will work best and he can decorate the rest

Why bother asking him if you wanted to go with the blue?

B&q do a Star Wars wallpaper. Comice book style and not to badly priced.

When my sister moved out of our shared bedroom, and I grew out of the Beatrix Potter decor, I got to 'choose' my redecoration.

Now I did like the muted shade of blue, but I didn't exactly get a ton of choice about the decoration really. I envied the tacky delights all my friend's bedrooms were.

I do think compromise is necessary, because red and black is a very harsh colour scheme, to have in the house and to get rid of. Chances are, if you do one wall red (with a massive Darth Maul sticker), two walls grey, and one white, all with big posters/themed decor, he'll go nuts for it anyway.

Here you go, get him to pick four one for each wall. It will be so much easier to take the paper of when he's fed up with them, or put any plain paper up that you can paint red and black then strip the paper of.

www.photowall.co.uk/search?q=star+wars&g=photo-wallpaper

Get theeself on Pinterest! They have lovely TASTEFUL ideas for decorating with a starwars theme. It can be done!

Really don't see the issue, he's the one whose room it is so why not let him choose?

I remember being about 10 and very upset when DF told me that I would be getting what I'm given in regards to my room decoration. Let him choose, you'll be the best mum ever and in any case it's him that has to live with it.

I've always let mine decide. We have had some random colours over the years, including red, black and other dark colours. They aren't a pain to paint over. A coat of white and then your usual two coats of colour. Even coloured skirting only takes two coats of white gloss.

With the darker rooms, we accessorised with brighter colours. Sometimes this just involved painting existing furniture or shifting around some accessories from other rooms.

I would probably try and find a Star Wars wallpaper and do one or two walls in it plus the red he wants. I wouldn't be painting walls black though.

Actually, I've just read thecatsthecats post and I'd do what they suggest.

Pinterest is a great idea, sit down with him and go over different room ideas and explain some concerns you have with red and black. He may see your point

We have two walls red and two white which looks good. The "theme" comes from accessories.

I'm still traumatised by the aftermath of our 1960s themed set for a school play. The following year, we enthusiastically went to white over the black and white pattern and quickly found a mottled thundercloud effect as the black just ran. We ended up having to cover it with backing paper as a lost cause. I wouldn't be able to face black again after that!

Children's decor needs to be a compromise of their tastes, but realistic with the parents' ability to maintain the house.