Not to like people that hate their kids?

[highinthesky]

I recently watched "Victoria & Abdul". Queen Victoria was undoubtedly a formidable character and led a long and complex life, but I know from a number of sources that she didn't like her chidren, nor showed much of an interest in them until it came to interfering in their lives. Yet she was capable of loving her husband with a passion. It occurred to me that I could never have liked her as a person - whatever other redeeming eatures she might have - based solely on how she treated her kids. How can anyone be so unpleasant to the fruit of their own womb, even if they have had a prickly relationship with their own mother?

AIBU to on principle dislike people that treat their own children badly? Wtf was wrong wth her? The woman can't have had PND for over 60 years!

Fekko I’m pretty sure it was the ninth child that she had that with!

Victoria had suffered from severe PND. She hated pregnancy and the constricts she was put under and apparently didn’t like sharing her husband’s attention with her children.

She is noted in one of my history books for being horrified by one of her daughter’s choosing to breastfeed!

Some people are definitely not cut out to be parents.

My Grandmother treated my DMum in the most appalling of ways whilst treating her son like a Prince his entire life. Mum was a good Mum to us two girls but my sister has never bonded with her DD and has freely admitted that she doesn't like her daughters personality. History is repeating itself though as Sister treats her DS like a prince. I felt very sorry for the DD growing up. You could see she was desperate for my sisters approval as my DMum was desperate for affection and approval from her mother. Nothing has ever been forthcoming from either mother to their daughter. My Mum had MH issues all her adult life and my niece is looking like she is following the same path. Utterly heartbreaking.

I must agree. There is something so inhuman about not loving someone so innocent a failure wholly dependent on you.

Some people are definitely not cut out to be parents.

So why in this day and age do they decide have children? Children are the most precious gift. To actively dislike your own throughout their childhood to adulthood is unfathomable.

In my sister's case she had kids to cement her position married to a rich bloke with land and all the trappings OP. Prior to meeting him she always said she wouldn't have them as they would be a 'blight' on her life.