To ask for your advice about coping with a big baby while having fibro and CFS

[TheCygnet]

Posted this in Parenting but only got one short response, so posting here for traffic.

I obviously knew before I got pregnant that it would be difficult looking after a baby bearing in mind that I have fibromyalgia and CFS. I wasn't expecting my son to be quite so big so soon though He is under 5 months and weighs over 21lb (98th percentile or so). This means that carrying him is not optional as he can't walk yet and I'm home alone with him during the day (on mat leave). At the moment I can manage BUT he is already so tall that he is now at the very limit of the changing table (70cm) and I will struggle to change him on the floor and certainly to pick him up again. Can you buy bigger changing tables and where from? And does anyone have suggestions for making things easier as he continues to get bigger and heavier as I can see that it won't be that long until I start to struggle at this rate? I can't use a sling so that is out. Any suggestions or tales of your experiences welcome.

I have a very dodgy knee I realise That's not the same. I change my child on a mat on the sofa.
He's a toddler now.

That sounds tough OP. I have a spinal condition and I've found it hard physically at times even with two petite children (your 5 month old is the same weight as my very dinky 16 month old!)

Regarding the changing table, it's absolutely fine for their legs to dangle off the end. I used the changing table with DS1 until he potty trained (2.5). Ours is a cheap Ikea £60 effort but hasn't yet collapsed despite DS1 (now 4.5) liking to climb up on top of it to keep his little brother company!

I nappy changed on the kitchen counter, gave baths in the bathroom sink until 2. I also used a pushchair with handles that could be adjusted for height.

Furry, we bought (perhaps stupidly - first child) a changing table that is actually drawers at the bottom and changing bit on top and it has a big lip all the way round so his legs can't really dangle off the end He's also very active already and he kicks and wriggles so that he is hitting his heels on the wood. Doesn't seem to bother him much but sounds painful! Maybe we should buy a cheap folding one with no edges and let his legs dangle off LOL. That's a good idea, thanks.

I had 2 big babies with M.E and fibro so feel your pain literally

I had a fabric folding changing table from ikea that was a life saver and lived in a bungalow at the time so it was always nearby for changing purposes

Could you put the mat on your bed or sofa to raise it up for you?

Schroedingers well done for doing it twice! It's nice to find people who understand. The fabric changing table sounds good - I'll be off to Google shortly. I could put the changing mat on our bed as it's quite high (fancy mattress for my bad back) it's just that all the supplies are in the nursery, which is why I was thinking about something I could put in there permanently rather than going back and forth for nappies and clothes etc (my DS has pretty bad reflux so there are lots of clothes changes unfortunately lol).

I did spot one when I googled today, the beauty was it was an x frame so folded if you needed it out the way but had fabric pockets for nappies wipes etc at table height so need to bend

In fact I just checked and there are 3 on eBay at the moment

I used to start the day with a box of supplied in the living room and changed on a mat on the sofa.

I used to minimise going upstairs due to ME though and try to have as much to hand as possible.

Change mat on your bed/sofa? I have bad knees and a bad shoulder so couldn't really manage the floor thing either. I used a mat on the bed.

I have 12 month old twins and ME / endometriosis / possibly fibro too (been in obscene amounts of pain for the last 9 months but still don't know why). I really struggle with changing them, lifting them etc and they're about the same weight as yours now (each obviously!). We got a second hand Ikea changing table which is fabric and the top dips so it's harder for them to roll in it (although they are now experts!). Sadly it's discontinued but maybe someone makes something similar? My husband has to do lots of the lifting when he's around as it hurts so much. Now they're moving I have a big play pen as I strigggle to sit on the floor with them and chase them around.

See someone else has the same table - they're great

Just move the supplies from the nursery to your bedroom, if changing him on your bed is easier?

I have fibro and my 4 babies were all large, no 4 was 11 lb at birth and 28lb at 7 months. I changed him wherever, def didn't lug him up and down stairs unnecessarily. I found a hippychick hipseat good for when I had to carry him and always used the buggy, even for say a short dash into the doctors or whatever. Incidentally he is a perfectly normal, skinny (though tallish) 6 year old now, I still can't believe what a massive baby he was!