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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To get annoyed at people accosting DH and accuisng him on being a 'layabout'

16 replies

PeachyChocolateEClair · 06/04/2007 13:49

Its happened a few times now, DH goes out on a week day and someone makes nasty comments about how he is lazy and should get off his backside and get a job. BIL gets it too. There was even a letter on teletext yesterday (although I only read it to laught at the letters admittedly) stating that the police should be able to go in and question able bodied men in pubs on a workday as they were all benefits layabouts.

DH and BIL work long night shifts, thats why they are about in the day, and why we were in the beer garden at 4 yesterday, with the kids palying on the swings because the park has been vandalised again.

I dont think peole have the right to judge claimants anyway, but I am sick of Dh getting hassled!

OP posts:
Kif · 06/04/2007 13:52

Oh poor you. Definitely reasonable to be

SherlockLGJ · 06/04/2007 13:53

Is it really hassling or just a snide comment ?

It is a shame that the welfare system has been abused so badly that people have skewed views.

Where do you live ? Around here if you saw a family tableau in a beer garden in the afternoon, you would assume that the DH was working from home. TBH

SenoraPostrophe · 06/04/2007 13:54

blimey, that does seem a bit forward.

Maybe you should get him a badge that says "shift worker" ?

Lol at that letter btw. quite right: people on benefits should not be akllowed in pubs.

PinkTulips · 06/04/2007 13:54

that's shocking!

how dare people comment when they don't know the situation.... have never ever had that here and as you know dp has been out of work for ages now and was working nights before that

cazzybabs · 06/04/2007 13:54

My god I would never dream of making any kind of comment to anybody...none of my business what other people do...

Original poster
PeachyChocolateEClair · 06/04/2007 13:55

It varies, often snide comments, but some lady accosted him a few weeks ago and told him he was letting the boys down by not earning money for us! BIL has even been turned out of a shop because benefits claimants (apparently) nick all their stock

Bizarrely, DH wears his work fleece everywhere. Or is TNT logo'd workwear the 'look' now?

OP posts:
SherlockLGJ · 06/04/2007 13:56

Not saying a snidey comment is acceptable by the way, just that it is better than a full on confrontationl. IYKWIM

LGJ stops digging..............

Original poster
PeachyChocolateEClair · 06/04/2007 13:57

Oh I know what you eman about working from home- not much of that here, afaik, but erm, quite a posha rea, as far as South East Wales goes.

OP posts:
SherlockLGJ · 06/04/2007 13:58

Your DH and your BIL should say something along the lines of, I quite agree with you Madam, shocking isn't it, why at work we scarcely talk of anything else.

Now bog off you narrow minded auld bitch.

deaconblue · 06/04/2007 21:30

i can't believe people could be so rude. Are these strangers saying stuff to your dh? How odd, they should mind their own business.

TwinklemEGGan · 06/04/2007 21:32

Blimey - I would fear for the other person if anyone ever made that comment to my DH (he's a SAHD at the moment).

themoon66 · 06/04/2007 21:33

I'd be bloody furious too. How do they know he's not working, just coz he's seen out with LOs in the day time. He might have just come back from a six month tour of Iraq, being shot at or summat. Very on your behalf.

gemmiegoatEGGS · 06/04/2007 21:33

where do you live Peachyclair? My dh has worked permanent nights for nearly 10 years and we have never had one comment. I think you have been unfortunate to have people feel like your business is THEIR business.

I mean, even if your dh didn't have a job...it doesn't mean you aren't allowed a life anymore. Tch, some people...

Original poster
PeachyChocolateEClair · 07/04/2007 21:43

i think where we live is a lot to do with it- its a m/c office /professional sort of area, wheras dh's job is all that, but a bit unconventional (basically, he helps plan the traffic on the newspaper deliveries- and as it is newspapers it has to be done at night)

I will admit Dh does look, erm, scruffy at best but thats OK by me so none of anyone elses business.

Just judgemental idiots, I s'pose.

OP posts:
Blondilocks · 07/04/2007 21:56

It's stupid & I would have no qualms in saying, actually he's worked a night shift which is probably much worse than a 9-5 stint! What about people like pilots who get a lot of time off each week due to the limits in flying hours, or doctors who have to work shifts or those who work x days on x days off? It's soo stupid how people assume things.

Chickbabymummy · 09/04/2007 09:28

Deffo not! I used to work 12 hr continental shifts, 4 days on, 4 days off, 4 nights on and 4 nights off. And I've had a few dirty looks when I've been out window shopping, or going swimming on my days off. It is very frustrating esp. when you are on nights and not getting enough sleep due to the stupid fing council digging holes in the road when I was trying to sleep.
Not really a lot you can do unless you get him a few t-shirts or a badge that says "I'm a shift worker so bgger off"...

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