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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Feeling mortified at work!! Sorry if this is the wrong forum

22 replies

Mittens92 · 22/09/2017 11:06

I work in a laundrette and I didn't know the fire alarm was sounding. I was still in the laundry just carrying on with my duties, but then a few people came to me after saying didn't you hear that?! You need to go downstairs right now and speak to the manager and so I did but one of the staff members said not to worry she wrote my name down cos she didn't want me to get into trouble but now I feel like an absolute idiot! The matter of fact is, I am actually hard of hearing! I can function as such but I struggle to hear high pitched sounds. I have tried so many different types of hearing aids to date but I haven't managed to hear or get on with any of them no matter how many I have tried & I wear glasses too which doesn't help! I feel really low about what's happened. I really ought to tell the manager about this but I feel embarrassed! Been here almost 5 years and they still don't know.. they probably can suss it out?! Being deaf really depresses me and I was ok with it but now It has all come back to be again

OP posts:

Original poster

Mittens92 · 22/09/2017 11:07

An employee I work with makes me feel like sh!t all the time about the way I work as well and this time she obviously had better leverage to make me feel shit even more

OP posts:

Polycorn · 22/09/2017 11:18

You need to explain this to your manager. Its their duty to keep you safe, and tomake reasonable adjustments to accommodate your disability.
They cannot do it if you hide the information from them.

Being hearing-impaired is nothing to be ashamed off.

Now then, give yourself a little shake and go talk to them!

LikeTheShoes · 22/09/2017 11:29

I don't think you should be embarrassed, your employer on the other hand has a duty to make a safe working environment for you. If it had been an actual fire you could have died! Would a flashing light alarm work for you?

Spam88 · 22/09/2017 11:37

I don't know why you're ashamed OP, there's absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about agree that you need to speak to your boss though so they can put measures in place to ensure your safety.

mikeyssister · 22/09/2017 11:47

It's a health and safety issue that your employers need to sort out for you. If there really had been an alarm it could put your and other lives at risk.

I'd be very surprised if they haven't noticed bu now, but it's obviously not impacting on your work. They could link the lighting system to the fire alarm as a visual alarm.

Report your colleague's behaviour. It's unacceptable.

dantdmistedious · 22/09/2017 11:47

Nothing to be embarrassed about at all but you do need to let them know. They have a duty of care to you while you are on the premises.

OvertiredandConfused · 22/09/2017 11:49

Another one who thinks you should definitely go have a word with your manager.

If it makes it easier, then you could couch it by saying that, although you were obviously aware you have a hearing impairment, you haven't thought it impacted on your working environments up until now and so, because you are so used to it, never thought to mention it.

However, the fire alarm made you realise that there are some things outside of your normal day-to-day working pattern that are more difficult and so you thought you should let him know so you can work to identify an appropriate solution to get.

Good luck

Gizlotsmum · 22/09/2017 11:49

How did her marking your name off stop you getting into trouble? There should have been people checking everyone was out. Tell them, there is bound to be something they can do

shakingmyhead1 · 22/09/2017 11:49

ummmm the bigger issue is why didn't your manager/fire warden make sure the room was cleared?

coddiwomple · 22/09/2017 12:03

Don't be mortified, be thankful you realised the problem when it was just a test! How did that go unnoticed for 5 years?

Explain to your manager urgently, the company must find a solution (flashing light mentioned above is good). It's for your own safety!

You have managed to communicate without issue for 5 years, no one will look down at you. You will give nightmares to your manager, who will feel horrified to think what could have happened, whilst they were completely oblivious.

Do tell them please!

Herschellmum · 22/09/2017 12:04

I get it! I'm also hard of hearing ... I don't get on well with hearing aids too but like you I cope most of the time fine,, which make the times I don't much harder to deal with. You do need to tell your employer though. Hugs

guilty100 · 22/09/2017 12:05

You need to tell people that you have a problem, so that they know you need help in the event of an emergency.

I know what it's like. I'm hard of hearing myself, and I dread having to have THAT conversation. But with stuff like this, you have to. Your health and wellbeing is at stake.

MissionItsPossible · 22/09/2017 12:12

Why are you embarrassed? You could have died. THEY should be the ones who are embarrassed as it's a health and safety issue. They could get in very big trouble for this, you have nothing to worry about.

HerOtherHalf · 22/09/2017 12:14

At my place of work (well on the rare occasion I'm not working from home) the health and safety team regularly test the fire alarms in all areas to ensure they are working and can be heard. We also have fire wardens in each area who are tasked with doing a sweep to ensure everyone is out and a roll call is done at the assembly point to ensure everyone is present. I expect these are pretty standard practice for all but the smallest organisations and any one of them would have ensured you were not left in the building unaware and unnoticed.

So, not your fault and you should definitely raise it as an issue that could compromise not just your safety but other people as well.

SpaghettiAndMeatballs · 22/09/2017 12:19

It's absolutely not your fault, and such an easy fix - they just need visual as well as audible alarms (ie. a big flashing light - you will definitely have seen them on plenty of fire alarms in public buildings).

Your impaired hearing has no bearing on your work, just on your safety in this situation, and it's their responsibility to sort it out now that it has been realised.

Whinesalot · 22/09/2017 12:28

It doesn't affect your normal working day so nothing to worry about but you do need them to make an adjustment for your safety in the future.

Your mate might get into trouble though.

WhatchaMaCalllit · 22/09/2017 12:40

I'm a fire marshal where I work and one of the tasks we have to undertake when we have a drill (or in a real fire situation) is that we must check every room and as we leave the room, we close the door behind us (supposed to slow the spread of an actual fire). There are people who work with us who are hard of hearing and allowances must be made and steps take to make sure that everyone leaves the building if the alarm sounds. I'd be querying with them why they didn't do that.
Talk to your manager. Don't be mortified. There are ways to indicate to you that a fire alarm is sounding so don't panic.
Do also talk to your GP and get hearing aids or some assistance that will be under your control to help your hearing issues.

priscillap · 22/09/2017 13:10

I am hard of hearing and wear 2 hearing aids. I tried NHS aids for years but they were not much help. Finally I went to Boots after listening to the ads for about 3 months. That was 4 years ago. I will say, these hearing aids cost me £2000 but they are worth every penny. I got them on monthly terms after a deposit and I would not be without them. My daughter who is only 34 has recently had her hearing tested and she has gone for the same ones as me. It is a lot of money, but they are so much better, as the hearing range goes across 20 bands rather than the 10 bands as the NHS ones do. This is why the clarity is much better. It is a free hearing test so no obligation afterwards. They will give you one to try while you are there as well to help you decide.

teaandtoast · 22/09/2017 13:14

Is your phone capable of listening out for the alarm and alerting you?

And could the company install a fire alarm with a flashing light too?

Cath2907 · 22/09/2017 13:22

My husband is deaf and until he met me in his late 20s he didn't wear aids. He worried people would see them and think differently about him. I pursuaded him to get tested and they confirmed he needed hearing aids but he would only wear those aids that fit inside the ear canal. It cost us thousands to get the privately. The first few weeks with the aids were tough - it is a lot of information to process when you are not used to hearing it. They aren't comfortable.

When our daughter was born she had inherited his condition and she is aided. The fact that she doesn't care has really helped my husband. He has now got NHS provided visible aids (they have much better sound quality) that he wears and his embarassment has mostly gone. I am so proud of him and our LO for wearing these, I understand they aren't the most comfy things. However his enjoyment of life is so much better when he can hear what is going on! His mum is also deaf and she is not aided and retains that embarassment over her hearing. He can finally see that the option he has gone with is so much more liberating.

If you can get tested and get a proper diagnosis and support there is so much that can be done. Alarms that buzz and flash, amplifiers on phones, etc.. There is nothing to be scared or embarassed about! The aids need you to persevere. Good luck!

Original poster

Mittens92 · 23/09/2017 06:34

Hi everyone. I just want to thank you all so much for your comments and positive thoughts so far!!! My manager is off this weekend now so I am writing a letter and posting it through her door to ask about putting a flashing alarm in place for me, especially in the laundrette as I am mainly on my own there! The main building isn't too bad as all the doors slam when the alarm goes off so that gives me an indicator lol! I am feeling a bit more positive - I have done some research and have booked a few slots for a hearing test & to look at some new hearing aids. I know for sure the NHS ones are just not for me! Had them for 15 years and when I had a hearing test a couple of years ago for my disability assessment at uni, they said they won't be updating them, just adjusting them... even though they're 15 years out of date! Tried them again but I just wanted to throw them after a day! I need something lighter and discreet cos the NHS ones also really heavy on my ears and they stick out more due to wearing glasses! Thank you all again! I am getting right on it now! I can't believe I buried my head in the sand ... That's what I always seem to do! I hate facing up to reality sometimes x

OP posts:

thecatsarecrazy · 23/09/2017 09:41

Just wanted to add please dont be embarrassed op. I have 2 sons who use hearing aids. Ones 10 and one is a baby. Nobody else in the family are deaf but dh and i have passed it on . I dont want them to feel bad about having them

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