AIBU childminder?

[firsttimedaddy11]

Hi all, just wanted to gain some opinions, My DD 9 months old has started with a childminder 2 weeks ago, great ofsted reports and glowing references all round and most of all my DD seemed really happy, yesterday mum collected her from childminders and when I got home from work I gave DD a bath, it was at this point I noticed a bruise on the side of her forehead, asked mum if she had a tumble which she hadn't, so we were a little perplexed. Mum dropped her off at childminders this morning and just casually mentioned that DD had a. Suisse on her head and was not sure if it had happened at home, to which the reply was "actually she did fall against the stair gate yesterday and bumped her head a bit". AIBU to expect notification of any bumps to my DD's head? Surely it would be second nature to mention this in case of any signs of concussion later in the evening or night.

Secondly My with DD it can be very difficult to get her to drink water, she prefers formula. But obviously at 9 months she is well into her weaning journey so it some times takes a little effort to get her to drink from her sippy cup, with this in mind we left instructions with the childminder that if she is having an extra stubborn day and won't drink from her cup that some water in a bottle would do the trick. my girlfriend collected DD one day last week the childminder mentioned that DD had not drank much, GF asked if she had tried the bottle, to which our childminder went on to explain that for developmental reasons she should drink from a cup. We understand that but also understand that we all need to keep hydrated. The bottle had remained in her bag all day untouched, when DD seen it she reached out to grab it and drank it all in a matter of minutes.

How would you go about voicing these concerns with your childminder?

Sorry for the long post but we are both first time parents and would like to get some opinions from others before we judge our childminder.

She's barking. There's nothing at all wrong with plain water in a bottle at 9 months. You need to make it very clear that dd needs her drink!

And she should have mentioned the 'bump' on the stair gate. Fair enough some kids bruise very easily, but she would have had to bump it quite hard.

if she was at home and had a small stumble against the stair gate would you worry about concussion? No. So it won't happen from a small stumble at the childminders. The bruise didn't come out until later as no one noticed it until bathtime. It's not unreasonable for the child minder not to mention a slight stumble that caused no damage or upset at the time; you'd be there all day if she told you every little thing.

I'm torn on the water. Presumably at 9 months she's still having milk anyway, so any extra water is probably unnecessary. I'd offer water in a sippy cup but I've never given mine it in bottles - they had milk, water was more to get them used to the concept.

Cross post, and two completely different views in 2 posts

I suggest you find someone else.

It's hard to say, the bump could have been a very minor thing and as a PP said you could be there all day hearing about every bump and scrape.
I would be firm with the water, she should be doing things your way with your child. But it wouldn't be a deal breaker for me.

Could you ask her what her policy is about reporting accidents i.e. does she only inform parents if the child has required a cold compress? If there was no mark at the time and she wasn't distressed maybe the cm wasn't sure exactly which part of her made contact with the gate when she stumbled?
I wouldn't worry too much about the water either tbh. It's not the height of summer and she should still be having a lot of milk at her age. I think giving a bottle will undermine the use of the cup as well as it's much easier for them to drink from the bottle.

As a childminder myself the first thing I would say is a good childminder will welcome you voicing your concerns however you feel comfortable (as long as it's not rude of course!). The bumped head...it's hard to judge, once babies are mobile they have lots of little bumps and knocks and it can be hard to judge when to fill out an accident form - if she didn't cry much and it looked like a very minor bump I can see why she didn't think to inform you.

Water wise, I can't see where she's coming from at all. Bottles are fine up to 1 year old - with cups introduced and encouraged of course. I would insist on this point. If she's as good as her ofsted she'll happily oblige. It's hardly a difficult thing you're asking for.

It's a tiny little bruise. There will be a good few more of them before you buy your outfit for their graduation.

So I think YABU but I also think this is all quite new so it is good you that checked here instead of making unnecessary waves.

Same with the water - they don't need water until they are fully weaned. The milk has all they need.