to think my husband has a drink problem?

[RagamuffinAndFidget]

I'd be very grateful for any opinions on this please, I don't know what to think.

DH doesn't drink every day, and he doesn't always get drunk when he does have a drink, but he can't stop himself drinking if it's available, IYSWIM?

An example - today he was given two bottles of red wine with roughly a glass' worth missing from each (he works in a restaurant and bottles can only be open for a certain amount of time, so the staff are sometimes given the leftovers). I went to work at 5:30, came home at 9:30 and it is all gone. Not even half a glass left. Now I know that's not a ridiculous amount to drink per se but if it had been four bottles he would have finished those too.

I am hugely irritated because I feel he was irresponsible in drinking so much when in sole charge of the children, and also because he doesn't feel that he has a problem while I think it's clear he does.

If he only had one beer in the fridge he would only drink one beer, but if he had ten he would drink ten. That's not right, is it? I will sometimes have a glass of wine of an evening, but it's one glass (maybe two) and then I put the bottle back in the fridge. Isn't that normal? He doesn't see any issue with the way he drinks, maybe there isn't one? I don't know... AIBU to think he needs to sort this out?

Bloody hell if I was expected not to have a drink whilst in sole charge of children, I'd never bloody drink! I'm a bit the same though OP. Hence not buying it so I can't drink it. Sounds like it's become a habit rather than a full blown problem, but one he perhaps should be aware of and perhaps a bit more mindful of, before it becomes a real problem. Be prepared for a poor reception though, if you tell him to stop!

Yes that's a lot, and to drink it when in charge of children is irresponsible.
Feeling like he needs to finish it all is indicating a problem too.

My husband is the same. He either doesn't know when to stop or does but has no self control.

It's caused us to have some serious issues and once he became aware of the damaging effect it was having he stopped and I've not had any problems with him drinking to excess for months, though he still drinks, just doesn't go mad. Sometimes he's a lovely drunk (although slightly irritating) but other times he would become extremely obnoxious, beligerant on a couple of occasions he was not so vaguely threatening. After the second time of him being threatening whilst really drunk I told him the next time he got that drunk again and made me feel in danger when he came home I would leave and make it extremely hard for him to see his children unless he was supervised.

It worked.

Sorry to hijack the thread but I mean to say that there are different types of problem drinkers. You don't need to be drunk on a daily or weekly basis to have an alcohol problem. You have a problem if there's alcohol in the house and you cannot stop drinking till it's all gone. Your husband seems to have this issue with alcohol and that is an alcohol problem from where I'm sitting.
Good luck but be persistent as he'll likely put up fierce resistance.

Hello
My husband is an alcoholic and only now admitting it....a functioning one, has a good job but drinks daily anything that is there. I now don't drink...well rarely as I don't want alcohol in the house and want to be alert and ok for the kids at all times

Just to warn you as all addicts are they are highly manipulative

Yes your husband does have a drink problem and there are lots of online questionnaires you can do which shall make this come to light more.(I think the AA have one) Doctors used to use the CAGE questionnaire and now use more detailed ones.

Only he can decide not to drink, it is beyond your control...you can just be there to support him but overall you must look after yourself and your children

Best wishes