To think this is really rude!

[Dottie39]

Text a close friend to see how she is and ask if she would like to make plans to meet up soon. She replied immediately to say she had a new phone and lost her contacts so didn't know who I was, so I replied immediately to say it is Dottie.. this was yesterday morning and have heard nothing.
So she can text back straight away in case it's someone interesting or important, but once she knows it's just me... Meh!!! She is always rubbish at texting, but maybe it's just with me! Aibu to send a sarky follow up text?

I'd just ignore her. She's obviously not a close friend. Move on.

A lot more often than people probably believe me, I go to reply to texts when im doing things and dont actually hit the send button and then dont realise for a few days until i think they didnt reply.....maybe its something more innocent like this ? I would wait a few days but even then i dont think being snarky will help either of you or your friendship

It's much more likely that she just forgot that the original text was about meeting up. I wouldn't assume this is deliberate.

I frequently delay replying to text messages until I've got time and often that means the next day. I wasn't aware there was a requirement to reply instantly!! Maybe she thinks that, as you're a close friend and your request wasn't urgent, she'll get back to you when she's got a minute.

I guess the fact that she replied immediately when she didn't know who it was but delayed responding when she did would make me feel the same. Maybe you aren't as good a friend in her mind as she is in yours? I would text again about meeting up if you want to stay friends.

Yeah when I say sarky I do mean in a light-hearted way, not nasty at all!
I do get we are busy but it's that she obviously can reply instantly to check who it is, but not once she knows it's me...

Can understand why you feel like that but it's quite possible that she got the text when busy, asked who and then once she knew it was you made a mental note to reply with longer text when not busy and forgot. I know that seems rude still but I do this, just get caught up in things and then realise hours (sometimes a day or two) later that I didn't reply. I feel awful and it is crap of me but it's not deliberate or a reflection on how I feel about the person.

Yabu. There's plenty of reasons why she hasn't, not all of them rude. For example, I don't text people askibg about dates until I hav my diary in front if me. Might be days. You're overthinking it.

Yanbu
Even if she was busy she could have sent a line saying she'll be in touch soon - imo - but as previous posts show, we all think differently about these things.

I wouldn't send another text, sarky or otherwise, just leave it.

Unless I reply to a text as soon as I read it I'm terrible for completely forgetting. Usually until I go to send them an unrelated text sometime later. Sometimes there's even the reply written there and I've forgotten to send it.

I had issues with my phone so I had a few of those conversations when I got my new phone. I think I replied to everyone pretty much straight away, even if only to say 'Great to hear from you & match up a number with a name' type thing.

OTOH I'm UTTERLY SHITE at replying about meeting up because I need to check the calendar, work out what's happening with work & see if I'm likely to be needed at home by any of the tradesmen etc. So I think 'I'll look at that later' Then (as I'm not very well and it's affecting my memory quite a bit), promptly forget. I'm trying to use reminders & calendars & stuff but often get messages when I'm out & about and I feel sure I'll remember (quite a lot of denial about how badly it's affecting my memory!).

Fortunately my friends are either understanding or just as bad, and not too many appear to have been lost along the way. Though several of them would have sent a silly text saying 'Ah, too boring for you now you know its me 😂' type thing, as I might to them. Depends on your friendship I suppose though as there are some friends who I definitely wouldn't say that to as they'd take it seriously.

Try not to take it personally 💐

Yeah, pretty snark that they hadn't bothered with your name.
Or she has a controlling partner. As my ex frequently hid my phone, responded to my friends pretending to be me to "check" I wasn't seeing someone else.

As you can probably guess my friends & I wouldn't 'just leave it' or we'd have no friends left 😖😂. Life's busy. We can all be a bit crap with texts, it doesn't mean we don't value our friends or don't wantbto see them. I'd just send a text saying 'Fancy coffee/lunch thus week? I can do xyz days but not xy days. Can meet anytime but need to leave by x for school pick up' or whatever. I find it's less hassle & back & forth if I give some idea about my availability in the first text.

I am very random at replying to texts. Sometimes straight away, sometimes a day, sometimes a few days. If I'm busy and have a lot to reply to, and some require a bit of thought e.g. when should we meet up, then I probably take longer to reply. Don't take it personally and don't send a sarky text, you'll come across a bit needy. In answer to your heading, no it's not really rude.

Ignore her

YABU to expect an instant (or even delayed) response to every text. Maybe she put her phone down before you replied, maybe she saw it later but forgot to reply as she was busy and didn't have a day in mind. Maybe she replied but forgot to press send.

Ask again and stop being so sensitive

I wouldn't be so sensitive about something like this. I'd imagine she just forgot about the text - I do it all the time!

I am one of those awful people terrible with texts (I'm sorry I'm so sorry I know I deserve a flogging). It's never malicious on my part and I am working on it - it's always just me being scatterbrained and distracted. If I read a text when I don't have time to reply to it, I will completely forget about it. I try not to open a text until I know I can respond, but sometimes I do open it and then get pulled away or whatever, and sometimes I type out a response but fail to actually send it. I know I'm a monster, and I'm so sorry.

If she has form for being rubbish with texting, it could simply be something stupid like that, especially as she's just gotten a new phone and is fiddling about with setting it all up. Your invitation may well have slipped her mind if she went to save your number when you texted.

I'd try texting her again, perhaps with more detail so you have an excuse to text again? If she continues to ignore, then rethink the relationship with her.

Eh, I can be rubbish with texting, we all can but there is an etiquette to these things and what she did was definitely rude.

here is an etiquette to these things and what she did was definitely rude.

There is? The problem with texting/messaging etiquette is that there is little agreement on what it is. Witness the numerous threads on on "X texted me first thing/last thing/didn't respond, is this rude?"

I'm a lot like @LatteLoverLovesLattes in my texting habits so by expected speed of response here I'm rude but I would never text people early or late in the day unless it was an emergency. YMMV