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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To ask for your experience on studying and working

30 replies

twinklestar2 · 15/09/2017 10:31

Looking to finish my CIM Diploma in Digital Marketing. Started it a few years ago and then found out I was pregnant. Now have a 3-year-old and thinking of going back and doing the last two assignments to get the grade.

What is your experience of working, having a child and studying? It it really tough? Is it worth doing? Any tips?

Also TTC #2 and moving house just to make life harder!

OP posts:

Queenofthestress · 15/09/2017 10:37

Alternate nights of bath and bedtime with your DH
set aside 2 hours then to study or get up before little one and study then,
set up a study area before hand so all of your books and things are all to hand,
organisation and routines are key!

wheredoesallthetimego · 15/09/2017 10:38

Most professionals do it - doctors, lawyers, accountants etc all have to study and work at the same time. It's crap but if you're organised you can do it.

sleepykidsplease · 15/09/2017 10:40

Being organised and not giving yourself excuses to not study is the key. I study every night except for Saturdays, that is my night off. I find if I give myself any extra nights off I get out of the swing of it and have to force myself to get back to it.

GrapesAreMyJam · 15/09/2017 10:42

This reply has been deleted

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

Birdsgottafly · 15/09/2017 10:43

You've just got to do the work as soon as you can.

Also, accept that the rest of life has to be put on hold and the housework may have to drop down etc.

Always keep the end goal in mind, it will all be worth it and your three year old won't remember things slipping, neither will you, years later.

chocolatestrawberries · 15/09/2017 10:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Birdsgottafly · 15/09/2017 10:49

Missed that you've got a Partner. I did mine as a LP to three children.

As long as he's fully on board, you shouldn't have an issue.

As for moving, get rid of clutter and stuff you don't really need/use. It makes everything easier.

EnglishRose13 · 15/09/2017 10:51

I'm working full time, studying (professional qualification) and I have a 17 month old.

It's tough. So tough. But it's not impossible. You need to plan. You need to use your lunch breaks to study (or come in early, but I understand that's not an option for everyone). You need to have help with the child (he spends the weekend before each exam with the grandparents - my parents one day, DH's the next).

If this is what you really want, and you have the determination to get through it, you'll succeed.

Good luck!

Original poster

twinklestar2 · 15/09/2017 10:57

I don't think I have the drive and determination. I think I would like to be one of those people who does, but deep down I don't.

I would love to do this to prove it to myself.

Sorry, just thinking out loud!

OP posts:

Want2bSupermum · 15/09/2017 11:09

DH studied for his MBA while working FT and I was studying for my CPA exams while working FT and taking accounting credits. I was pregnant while taking the credits and had DD1 while taking CPA exams. Sat my last exam when I was 34 weeks pregnant. Had DS in late Feb and DH finished up the following December. We live 3000 miles from family. Bear in mind I had 15/16 weeks leave with DD1 and 8 weeks leave with DS.

It was a mixture of arguments for who was studying, hiring help and me doing a crap load of the housework. I got C grades in most of my accounting courses that I took when DH was studying and before that I was a grade A student with top marks. I was very resentful that because he couldn't handle stress of exams I had to stop what I was doing and hold his hand. This heavily affected my studies and my career at the time. We have recovered and getting qualified has been the making of our financial freedom. Yes we work hard but we have a lifestyle that we couldn't have had without the sacrifice.

You have two exams left to go. Complete them. The move can wait or your OH can do more this time. If you have family close get them to help too.

Allthebestnamesareused · 15/09/2017 11:25

Did my final exam for law degree when 38 weeks pregnant and working fulltime as a legal executive and my LPC when my DS was 2. It was tough but my DH was supportive (cooking whilst I studied , taking baby swimming etc to give me quiet house etc. Hard work but doable if you are committed.

ilovesushi · 15/09/2017 11:33

Last year I completed a part time masters while working full time. It was a very hard year, not so much because of juggling work and study, more because I had almost no family time. My dad fell seriously ill and the travel to spend time with him sucked up any remaining hours in my week. My kids are primary school age and I felt I pretty much abandoned them for the year. I had to do it and it was a great achievement, but I wouldn't do it again. I managed because we have wonderful neighbours with kids the same age, who took the kids out some weekends and a great loving childminder. My heart almost broke one weekend when I squeezed in ten minutes badminton in the garden with DS and it was like the best thing that had ever happened to him. I had to do it but it compromised my family life too much.

NiceCuppaTeaAndASitDown · 15/09/2017 11:34

I did a PD Dip IDM while working full time. I'd suggest you consider getting a cleaner or suddenly you'll get an urge to spruce up the house rather than work! Never before or since have I suddenly decided to wash my hall curtains.
I also think that our slow cooker was a godsend or we'd have had a lot of takeaways

VioletCharlotte · 15/09/2017 11:35

It's hard. I'm doing a diploma in internal comms at the moment whilst working full time. I find it really hard to find the discipline to work in the evenings so book time off work to do it. The workshops are on Saturdays so that's tough too after working all week. My kids are older teens so pretty self sufficient, I don't think I could do it with little ones.

5rivers7hills · 15/09/2017 12:31

Study and work - hard but doable you just sacrifice fun/social life/exercise.

Study and work and child - no idea! You'll need a supporting DP who will do the lions share fo child care to give you time in the evenings and weekends without child.

ButtMuncher · 15/09/2017 12:36

I'm a mum of a one year old working more or less full time and doing second year of my BSc in Psychology. No idea how it's gonna pan out as the previous year was 3 years ago minus the full time job (was PT) and didn't have my son - we shall see! Good luck!

TheBusThatCouldntSlowDown · 15/09/2017 12:49

I'd suggest you consider getting a cleaner or suddenly you'll get an urge to spruce up the house rather than work! Never before or since have I suddenly decided to wash my hall curtains.

Yes, prepare to suddenly become extremely houseproud.

Routine is the key, once you've got into the habit of studying at certain times, and not procrastinating, then it becomes second nature. Also, I found waking up early (5am) and studying before work when everything was quiet was easier that doing it at the end of the day when you're tired and willpower is running low.

RJnomore1 · 15/09/2017 12:52

I found it easier when my kids were younger and went to bed at 7/8/9. I studied then. Now they're up later (13 and 17) and I find it more difficult to concentrate.

I'm a habitual student, doing a PGCert st the moment, have a full time role in education management as well.

You do need to really want to though.

RoboticSealpup · 15/09/2017 13:00

I personally think it's a recipe for burnout. But don't mind me, there will be droves of posters telling you how they completed their PhD as a single parent, whilst pregnant with their third child under three and working 60 hours, getting up at 2am to study and barely breaking a sweat. Only you know which of the two scenarios is more likely for you.

BooRadley35 · 15/09/2017 13:01

I don't have children but find it difficult to study and work FT. Main thing that helps me is no zero days - don't have a day where you do nothing. Even if its just reading one page or chapter make sure you do something.

Original poster

twinklestar2 · 15/09/2017 13:05

Thanks everyone and Booradley thanks for that tip.

I often sit on the sofa between 8 and 10pm messing around on my phone when I could be studying.

I find the content interesting and am committed to a career in the field, I just need a kick up the backside. Daily.

OP posts:

BelleBeauty1 · 15/09/2017 13:09

I have 3, one with sen. I did a masters and worked full time with a 2 week old. I managed to finish, but it sent me a bit crazy in the middle!

chocolatestrawberries · 15/09/2017 16:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Want2bSupermum · 15/09/2017 22:37

Give yourself a kick up the backside daily then. DH wasn't motivated for his MBA. It was me pushing him to do it. Once he started male pride caught up with him.

My motivation was what the qualification could do for me. I qualified in 2013 and in the past four years my salary has more than doubled.

newmobile · 15/09/2017 22:42

Finding it difficult currently working full time with 4 children and studying for a degree. I'm about to start my second year and I'm feeling anxious about the year ahead.

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