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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Teacher Shouting

30 replies

Dottie39 · 15/09/2017 10:12

Not actually sure if I am being a bit over protective.

Basically son is Yr 5, a sensitive boy and quite intelligent and generally well behaved. His class seem a good bunch and are quite a small class, 19.

They have a teacher this year with a reputation for being very strict. I have no problem with this but she is very shouty. Since they went back my son tells me she shouts daily, ranting at them. I personally think that it's a bit unprofessional and not creating a great learning environment. The class have made it this far with various teachers who have not felt the need to shout at them this way. My son is becoming less involved in class, won't put hand up etc as nervous of being shouted at in case he gets it wrong. Yesterday the class were given work and apparently noone could complete it. The teacher shouted at them all and told them they should know this and she is let down by them all. I'm not happy about this, I think negative language and shouting is bad for the class and bullying! Aibu to say something? In a workplace it would not be acceptable to treat people like this....

OP posts:

ProfessorCat · 15/09/2017 10:21

I'm afraid I don't understand any teacher who needs to bellow at children in order to teach or discipline. I very, very rarely raise my voice in a negative way - a good teacher just doesn't need to. In fact, I find a quiet, low voice is much more effective in discipline.

I'm not sure what I would do to be honest. I've never come across a ranty teacher although I've known some generally loud ones. I don't think that complaining is going to make her change her teaching style, but obviously her methods aren't working. Are you on friendly terms with some of the other parents? It can't just be your DS feeling negative if she's that bad.

echt · 15/09/2017 10:28

Nine times out of ten, an adult showing displeasure at normal volume is shouting.

I say this as a parent and a teacher.

What do you mean by "negative language"?

Ipsie · 15/09/2017 10:32

I accused a teacher of shouting once when at school. My teacher looked at me with a raised eyebrow and then extremely loudly shouted "no, THIS is shouting!' Then lowered her voice to say "&a this is me projecting my voice to get your attention over the noise you are making and to ensure I keep it as I let you know I'm not impressed " I apologised and never accused her of shouting again!

Viviennemary · 15/09/2017 10:38

I don't think that telling a class of year 5's that they have let her down as they couldn't do the work is very good practice at all. Maybe she is using the method of being really strict for the first weeks of the term to let the class know who's in charge. It doesn't sound great though.

ZoeWashburne · 15/09/2017 10:43

What evidence do you have at shouting? From your DS? How do you know she behaves this way? Unfortunately, children are not the most reliable witnesses, and I agree with previous posters that most of the time children equate shouting with being disciplined. I am not saying he lies, but there can be multiple sides to the story.And what is perceived by one person can be completely different to others.

@Ipsie makes a fantastic point. Teachers need to command the room. I think it is fair to schedule an appointment with the teacher saying 'DS is sensitive and isn't coping well in a formal strict classroom environment. For example, he is having a lot of anxiety about participating for fear of getting it wrong. Have you noticed this?
What can we do to work on this?'.

Also, I really dislike the term 'bullying' being thrown around at any sign of trouble. From what you have said, I don't think your son is being bullied.

Lovingmybear2 · 15/09/2017 10:43

I think if you shout constantly it becomes white noise to be honest.

Maybe she just has a loud voice though?

Littlecaf · 15/09/2017 10:47

I had a strict shouty teacher in (then 3rd juniors) now year 5. I hated her & that year. But it didn't really change me or my outlook or my overall learning experience, but I do remember her compared to some of the others. So maybe see how it goes and bring up if it carries on? It's really early in the school year.

VioletCharlotte · 15/09/2017 10:53

Good teachers don't need to shout. Lots of children really don't respond well to be shouted at and switch off (quite understandably!) My DS were both like this.

I think teachers who shout do it because they've lost control. It doesn't really solve anything. The disruptive kids realise they're winding him/her up so carry on being disruptive and the rest withdraw.

Teachers should only shout if someone is in danger and they really need to get everyone's attention.

I do have sympathy though as being a teacher must be very difficult, but the schools should support shouty teachers and help them find other methods of engaging the class and managing behaviour.

Joolsy · 15/09/2017 10:54

My DD had a teacher like this last year. She was terrified of her at first but I reassured her that if she was working hard and doing as she was told, even if the teacher 'shouted', it probably wouldn't have been aimed at her. I used to help out in the class occasionally and realised this teacher more projected her voice when needed rather than shout, which was what was needed as they could be a noisy bunch. She also sometimes told the class they had been disruptive/noisy etc and she was disappointed but generally wasn't aimed at everyone - the ones that she was talking to knew who they were! She became one of my DD's favourite teachers because the teacher respected her as DD worked hard and didn't mess about. Maybe he just needs to give it time.

Amethyst975 · 15/09/2017 11:14

Does your son have sensitive hearing? Mine does and he can be a bit freaked out by people with loud voices.

It does seem like a good first step to ascertain if she is actually shouting or if that's just the way your son and possibly other kids perceive it.

Nuttynoo · 15/09/2017 11:37

You just have your son's word for it. He probably tells his friends you shout when you don't. I suggest you keep a diary of his behaviour, then ask for a meeting with teacher to tell her you have concerns. It's very likely he's being bullied and blaming the teacher shouting as a smoke-screen.

mmgirish · 15/09/2017 12:05

I had a parent complain about me to the head saying I was shouting all the time. He asked her to speak to me about it. She came to my classroom and confronted me quite aggressively. I told her I hadn't been shouting all the time and then asked her child to confirm whether or not I had been. Child then admitted that she had made it up...

helpfulperson · 15/09/2017 12:20

I find it strange how it seems to be OK for parents to shout at their children - 'shouty mummy' etc and a bit of a joke but as soon a teacher even raises their voice there is a large swell of criticism, And the teacher is trying to control 30 children, not just one.

user1487689176 · 15/09/2017 12:24

Your son needs to dry up a bit. I'm sure we all remember that one (or more) shouty angry teacher who took class control a bit far. We had one in years 5 and 6 who threw furniture when she got particularly riled up. Didn't seem to turn anyone into a quivering wreck.

TheHungryDonkey · 15/09/2017 12:26

I think year 5 must be a shouty year. I've heard various different year 5 teachers properly shouting regularly at different schools. My child's previous one that I pulled him out of in year 5 and ones I've worked in. It can be loud and I found it very stressful at the age of 40. Shouting adults can be frightening. Not all teachers project, some genuinely shout loudly a lot. I think it's unprofessional.

Threenme · 15/09/2017 12:33

Ffs this and another thread! Why do ppl have such a hard time believing kids aren't compulsive liars and fantasists! If my kids tell me something a- they very rarely lie, I've brought them up not to and b- I can tell! This teacher sounds utterly shit op!

Threenme · 15/09/2017 12:36

User that's stupid. If my kids teacher ever throws furniture because she's 'riled up' she will soon find out what real shouting is! Scaring kids and telling them to dry up is just horrible!

ProfessorCat · 15/09/2017 12:58

I think Year 5 must be a shouty year

It's really not.

echt · 15/09/2017 21:44

Ffs this and another thread! Why do ppl have such a hard time believing kids aren't compulsive liars and fantasists!

No-one has said this. What they have said is that frequently children perceive negative comments, especially in a displeased tone as shouting. They are not lying. It's how they hear it, but it isn't shouting.

Clearly the OP can go in and complain about the teacher's behaviour as it has been reported to her, but be prepared for the shouty bit not to be the case.

BTW the bit that does curl my toes is blaming the children for not having learned something and "letting her down".

Macaroni46 · 15/09/2017 22:55

Ffs is it teaching bashing night? So many complaining about school threads tonight!
There are currently 14000 unfilled vacancies in this country. I'm surprised there's not more. When did children become so precious and parents so over protective? Who'd work in a school with this constant barrage of criticism?!

Sequence · 15/09/2017 23:04

I agree Threenme. If the Y5 teacher was behaving similarly to the teachers from reception to Y4, they wouldn't be reporting this significant difference.

elephantoverthehill · 15/09/2017 23:04

I rather like the phrase 'I am not shouting, I am being assertive'.

Threenme · 16/09/2017 03:46

It's not teacher bashing, I don't spend all day shouting. In year 5 you are 9- 10 years old. Why would I spend the day shouting at 10 year olds. It's just white noise to the ones that are 'naughty' and don't really care and the ones that do end up nervous wreaks and dreading school. I'm not saying I've never shouted but I save it for the really good stuff so the kids know what has happened is really bad. I have never ever had on heart told a child of any age they have "let me down" when something is wrong. I think that's terrible. I have taken a child behaving really badly aside in private and said Calmly- "you're letting yourself down, you're better than this". Totally different situation and I think fine.

BodhiBear · 16/09/2017 04:20

I'm a new mum... little fellla Bodhi is 4 weeks today - and new to Mumsnet (although used to work at Dyson so worked with mumsnetters to test drive Dysons) and I wanted to ask what good brands of baby boy clothes there are out there - for outdoor stuff that's a bit more dare I say trendy? The likes of Jojo, JL, M&S, Next just aren't doing it for me and all seem a bit twee. Any reccos?

BodhiBear · 16/09/2017 04:27

Delete delete my reply please admin. Clearly I can't use the app, one handed, feeding at 4am. Need to learn new thumb skills. Sorry!

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