I've been invited to a friend's daughter's baptism at 12.30 in 2 weeks. I have two dd - one is 2 and our other is 5 months old.
The issue is that my eldest has a nap from 11.30/12 for 2-3 hours. If they miss it they are a nightmare, have hysterical meltdowns and it takes a few days to get back on track. I am a stay at home mum so it's hard enough with two as it is without the extra shit from missed naps. My youngest is now teething so it's pretty hellish. I have no support whatsoever so the girls are with me 24/7 and it's very hard for me day to day.
She is not a close friend but she is a friend none the less and Id genuinely feel awful if I didn't go as I'd be letting her down, mainly as I had agreed we would go before she booked it and obviously before I knew the time it would be taking place! I honestly just didn't think. I imagined it would be at 3/4 in the afternoon not lunch time.
It's miles away and the church is another 20 min drive from where the party is afterwards. I don't drive so can't go alone with the youngest dd. We have no one who can watch our eldest so I feel like either we all go and put up with the tantrums and shitty few days afterwards, or we all don't go and my friend will be very upset.
If it were somewhere I could get to on public transport it would be fine but even then, the church and reception are miles apart and realistically i can't do it, especially not with Sunday transport. I don't know anyone else who is going so can't ask for a lift.
Is it really unfair for me to pull out because of my eldest nap time? It sounds so silly to miss it 'because of a nap' but it really will cause havoc. Should we all go despite me knowing all hell will break loose if we go and she misses her sleep?
What should I do?