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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I'm 32 and never had a proper job, AIBU to think it's too late?

39 replies

HopelessHumphrey · 12/09/2017 13:13

Don't even have kids. I have had a fair bit of complicated health, and plagued with anxiety.

I've always done bits and pieces, bits of part time work here or there whenever I can. I have done some really great tasks with these jobs, so I can talk the talk but can't walk the walk because I have no training. My CV is full of holes and shows no solid length of time in any role.

I can't even do a LinkedIn profile because it just looks so ridiculous. I don't know what to do but I feel very depressed and like there is no escape?

It's too late for a good career isn't it?

I always was ambitious and worked part time since a teenager, but have managed to mess everything up so badly I can hardly believe it. I feel like I don't have any real skills at all.

OP posts:
LiveLifeWithPassion · 12/09/2017 13:17

It's not too late. Is there a particular career you have in mind?

Some training or a course may help.

PutTheBunnyBackInTheBox · 12/09/2017 13:19

Its never too late so don't think that!

How about volunteering? You can be in control of the hours you work and it's great for getting into a routine and gaining skills. You could start off with a few hours a week and build it up when you feel ready.

It would hopefully build your confidence, give you skills for your CV, gain work experience and who knows, may even lead to a permanent job!

Good luck Flowers

Original poster
HopelessHumphrey · 12/09/2017 13:19

I thought i knew what I wanted to do but it's not working out.

I have a degree and it's just so expensive to do another one. I need to have some money coming in, and some sort of future mapped out a little in any job before I commit more thousands of pounds to it.

OP posts:
FenceSitter01 · 12/09/2017 13:19

CVs are creative work of fiction, I wouldnt worry about that. You can plug your gaps with courses/own business/caring/travel.

However, if you don't have the educational qualificcations, a professional career probably is closed to you unless you are willing to retrain - and it's never too late to do that.

shirtyQwerty · 12/09/2017 13:20

All linkedIn profiles look ridiculous so don't worry about that.

This may not be what you want to hear but excuses about anxiety and health issues will have any prospective employer running a mile.

It absolutely isn't too late but make sure your CV is about skills as opposed to job titles. Relate those skills to the job you're applying for and think of understandable (from the interviewer's perspective) reasons for the holes.

You're at a disadvantage but by no means insurmountable.

Original poster
HopelessHumphrey · 12/09/2017 13:21

I do volunteer already but it's all a bit rubbish for my cv - I mean, I love the charity and they are great, but they fit round me and what I can offer so I just do what I can. Maybe I should find more voluntary work.

OP posts:
Likeaninjanow · 12/09/2017 13:24

You still have 30+ working years ahead of you, so certainly not too late.

PollyFlint · 12/09/2017 13:26

I think plenty of employers would rather employ and train a 32-year-old who is mature and enthusiastic than a younger graduate. Assuming your salary expectations are reasonable, I honestly see no reason why you wouldn't be a decent potential employee - if, of course, your health problems have been overcome and are no longer a barrier to full-time work.

Hard to give more specific advice without knowing what your career choice was that 'didn't work out' and what field you're hoping to get into.

Have you thought about signing up with a temping agency? Even some temporary admin work can give you some experience, get you used to different office environments and possibly open doors to permanent roles. Even if they're not necessarily roles you want to do forever, they'll at least pad out your CV and demonstrate that you can operate in a full time job.

Original poster
HopelessHumphrey · 12/09/2017 13:27

Yes, I know health is very off putting. I lost my one chance at a full time job in chosen field partly because of health. Also partly because they were a pretty chaotic company though. A small start up where I was hired and then left to it while the boss went to nurse her father in law in South America for 5 months. I had nobody to ask about anything and no training and I was a fucking disaster.

Despite what they say about the Equality Act, you can't mention things like time off for hospital appointments in interviews. You'd be an instant no!

OP posts:
Original poster
HopelessHumphrey · 12/09/2017 13:28

Marketing. I thought I had good soft skills needed for it, and good at ideas, but I'm no good at it.

OP posts:
Original poster
HopelessHumphrey · 12/09/2017 13:30

Can anyone recommend decent temping agencies in London?

OP posts:
PutTheBunnyBackInTheBox · 12/09/2017 13:32

I do volunteer already

There are plenty of volunteering opportunities, not just charity shops (if that's what you're doing).

volunteeringmatters.org.uk/

This site gives you volunteering opportunities in your area.

Secondtimesally · 12/09/2017 13:38

I hire temps from Sheridan Maine in London. One of my temps is eyeing up a perm job in our company once he finished his current role for my team. He is at advantage now as he knows our business (quite niche), and it's a change of career for him.

ExConstance · 12/09/2017 13:41

Although working at support worker level in care is not the most popular of jobs it can open the way to training and promotion. There are loads of management jobs going at salaries of around £50k and even though I'm 61 the head hunters constantly contact me. My route into this was not conventional and I changed career at 50, worth thinking about if you want to do something rewarding in more ways than one.

sizeofalentil · 12/09/2017 13:41

My DH's friend retrained in IT at 31 or 32, and is now making a fortune five years on. A lot of people I know quite their jobs in their 30s and 40s and retrained to work in more people-orientated industries, like psychology, therapy or even hypnotherapy!

Loads of people retrain or start again in their 30s, so nothing to say you can't make a start.

You just need to figure out what it is you want to do and commit to it.

usualGubbins · 12/09/2017 13:48

Look on the Reed website or on Indeed. LinkedIn is also good for jobs but certainly at your age it isnt the end of the world! I started my career at that age, having had my children quite young!

EamonnWright · 12/09/2017 13:50

People will disagree but fuck it, pad your CV out. Loads of folk do it.

pinotgrigio1 · 12/09/2017 13:51

I'm 33 and have just retrained. I spent my maternity leave studying from home and gaining a little experience. I was then fortunate enough to be offered the first job I applied for. I have been in this new position (complete change from my previous career) for a month and I am so happy.

There are people who will help you with your cv and with interview prep. I spent a lot of time preparing for the interview as I knew I probably wouldn't have a fraction of the experience many others would. Good luck and go for it!

RachelP247 · 12/09/2017 13:56

Don't believe everything you see on LinkedIn - it's people bigging themselves up and blowing their own trumpet.

Your attitude of "I'm no good at it" is what is holding you back, nothing else. It's a self fulfilling prophecy.

"Believe you can and you're halfway there"....

Kualabear · 12/09/2017 13:57

OP. I am sure you not 'are no good at marketing'. OK, perhaps you look less than good in red braces and a comedy tie. I run, and have run, organisations. We have the, the galaxy looks like this types, very valuable, and we have the ordering the brochures, checking the detail etc types. I am sure you can fit in somewhere, and that somewhere will be glad to have you. Confidence, if you don't believe in yourself, why should an employer? It comes across in interviews, believe me. A positive attitude is a powerful weapon, go for it.

Original poster
HopelessHumphrey · 12/09/2017 13:59

I use Indeed a lot when looking for jobs. I'm actually applying for all kinds of things at the moment, that I feel I could do admin wise and that I also have an interest in. But having no luck.

I'm getting interviews, and I'm keen at interview but when they ask lots of questions they just know I'm not skilled enough or experienced enough.

OP posts:
SerfTerf · 12/09/2017 14:00

Not too late.

I think you need to do something that draws a clear line on your CV and move forward from there. So that could be a course of some kind or volunteering or just a very definite change of some sort. Psychologically, it's also important to count this as day zero, so you don't get dragged down by what you perceive as past failures.

Original poster
HopelessHumphrey · 12/09/2017 14:02

I used to be more confident though and it was all a disaster Confused

Not that I ever blew my own trumpet - was always fully aware I had lots to learn. But couldn't seem to manage to pick things up and get into the swing of things like everyone else.

I think, sadly, my attitude reflects the calibre of employee I am. Which is not great and no addition Sad I want to fix this, but not sure how? I'm trying to find a mentor or support group for women, but it's hard to find.

OP posts:
Original poster
HopelessHumphrey · 12/09/2017 14:04

That's interesting - I like the idea of drawing a clear line, and saying I'm moving on to X. Not sure what it is though!

OP posts:
chitofftheshovel · 12/09/2017 14:24

I'm in a similar position but am four years older. Although without the health issues. I have never used my degree, which I got when my eldest was a baby, and am in a complete rut of doing cleaning jobs. I feel like I have so much more to give but don't get interviews for "proper" jobs.

Sorry no advise but I shall be watching this thread with interest.

Start by changing your username!!! Do it now.