AIBU to think there must be SOMETHING for my son to do?

[MouldyChipPan]

He's 16 and just left school. He's spent the past 2 months getting up at 2pm and going out, not to return until 11pm. He has no college course set up and no job/training to go to. He's been for a few interviews but they never go further than the actual interview (or if they do, he keeps it quiet). I'm at a loss. He can't just sit at home festering away now that he's left school! All his friend and are in college or training so why isn't he?? Surely there must be somwhere for 16 year olds to go if they've found nothing?

He's registered with a careers service, had an interview with them yesterday and was basically told "we'll see his you go over the next few weeks"!!!

I can't believe he's getting away with just doing nothing! What can I do? I'm desperately worried.

Is there nothing at all he wants to do at college as that would be the obvious choice. Lots of courses will still be accepting people even if term has started.

Not to sound harsh but maybe ultimatum time? Like find a job/make a plan by X or I'll start charging you rent.

Yup. Further education or pay rent. That'll put the wind up his sails. And don't give him any money!

Where is he going between 2 and 11pm?

Assuming you are in England/Wales, the 'age of participation' was raised to 18 - why is he not in further education?

Ha! Same boat - only my son went to college for 2 years and still can' get a job. He must have applied for 100's, biked round town dropping his CV in to businesses that might use his skills and... nada!

Job Centre are more interested in finding ways to stop people getting benefits than helping them find a job.

He has no college course set up and no job/training to go to. All his friend and are in college or training so why isn't he?
I don't know? Why isn't he? Did you discuss with him in yrs 10 and 11 what he wanted to do? Go to college open days with him and see what courses were on offer and see what inspired him? Help him with his applications and interviews? Or did you just leave it to him to see what would happen if left to his own devices? Colleges are doing open days in the next few weeks/months. Have a look with him, see what takes his fancy, help him apply?

Have you talked to him about apprenticeships or vocational training? If he's not keen on academic or classroom based courses, have you talked to him about learning a trade? What does he actually want to do? Have you asked? What sort of interviews did he go to - and did he get them by applying for jobs himself or being pushed into them?

He is getting away with doing nothing partly because you're letting him, though. Where's he going between 2pm and 11pm, for a start? Where is he getting his money from, if he isn't working? Are you giving him money? If so, stop. He's currently living the life of riley, frankly, so where's his incentive to find work?

Finally... is he smoking a lot of weed by any chance?

Hi,

There must be quite a number of parents in this situation. I was convinced my youngest would be NEET because he has a serious anxiety disorder and ran away from college interviews. However he is attending a course in employability skills at the moment, although it is very early days.

I thought if my son would not or could not attend college, voluntary work, a maths and English class or some part time work might help.

Send him to Sports Direct!

Seriously, they purposely take on those younger and with no experience as it's cheaper and although they are a crap not an ideal company to work for, it's a job to put on your CV and gain experience.

Plus if he hates it, it might give him a kick up the backside to do something else