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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

second hand mattress

18 replies

itsalwaysworkedbefore · 10/09/2017 18:15

So I told husband that we need a bigger bed in spare room, we have a three foot wide one at the moment. My idea was to buy a second-hand bed frame but get a new mattress. But no that would be far to bloody simple. He has fixed metal bars to the existing bed frame making it 3 foot six inches wide. Not only that but now he has bid on Ebay for a second-hand mattress to fit a small double bed which I am thinking will be at least 4 Foot wide.His offer has been accepted. Now he wants to drive fifty miles to pick the damn thing up. He knows I did not want a second-hand mattress as I have told him over and over again. Its not like we cannot afford a mattress, Now I feel like I am being ungrateful and he says if I do not like the mattress we will take it to a charity shop. But I know that wont happen because he will pull his bloody face. For the love of all that is holy why does he not listen.

OP posts:

Curious2468 · 10/09/2017 18:18

Don't think a charity shop would accept a second hand mattress tbh! I wouldn't be happy with this either. It sounds grim

LoyaltyAndLobster · 10/09/2017 18:20

I wouldn't be happy with this either, no way would a second hand matress me coming through the door of my home.

Changeschangechangeagain · 10/09/2017 18:21

Lots of charity shops accept second hand mattresses. British Heart Foundation will collect also.

carjacker1985 · 10/09/2017 18:21

There are plenty of furniture charity shops that will happily take a second hand mattress. I've slept in several rental properties where the bed came with the property and the mattress wasn't new, have slept in loads of hotels where the mattress has been slept on by countless others... you get the idea. Second hand mattresses are automatically disgusting, just depends what sort of condition it's in.

That said, if you'd prefer a new one that's your choice and he shouldn't have just gone and ordered a second hand one if you told him that isn't what you wanted.

carjacker1985 · 10/09/2017 18:21

*aren't disgusting, not are!

Changeschangechangeagain · 10/09/2017 18:23

I would give it a really deep steam clean and buy a full mattress cover for it.

PutTheBunnyBackInTheBox · 10/09/2017 18:28

DM volunteers in a charity shop and they don't accept second hand mattresses.

Aquamarine1029 · 10/09/2017 18:35

No fucking way would I allow a second hand matress from a stranger into my home. It could have bed bugs or God knows what. BTW, I am not a germaphobe or neurotic, but a used matress is where I draw the line. Second hand clothes? Perfectly fine. A matress?! NOPE.

Alpacaandgo · 10/09/2017 19:53

I bought second hand mattresses for my children's beds because it's all I could afford they looked virtually new though, they weren't crappy ones. A mattress for a small double won't fit a 3ft6 bed though!

SpaghettiAndMeatballs · 10/09/2017 19:55

I've had second hand mattresses from aquaintances (I still miss one that my sister has now, from a colleague of my mothers - it was the best mattress I've ever slept on!)

Surely for the cost of driving 100 miles he could have got a new one delivered by someone!

Witchend · 10/09/2017 20:00

In the four beds we have in our house 3 of them have second hand mattresses. We would have rebought if they didn't look okay though.
One of them was from a friend, the other we inherited when we bought the furnished house we rented and the other came off ebay with the bed.
They were all better quality than we could have afforded at the time. The one we inherited will need replacing in the next couple of years as it's beginning to sag slightly though. But it has had 16 years use since we got it.

notanotherNC · 10/09/2017 20:02

Grim! Who wants to sleep on someone's old mattress?!?!

donajimena · 10/09/2017 20:05

I have a second hand mattress. I moved house earlier in the year and didn't move my 14 year old mattress opting to get it taken away.
Anyway to cut a long story short the money I thought I had to buy a new bed got eaten up in moving costs left me bedless!
After 4 weeks on the floor I flipped and found on Gumtree an immaculate king size bed for 40. The house I bought from was pet free, smoke free and spotless. The bed was better than the one I had given up.
But obviously if funds had allowed I would have bought new

Civilsoot · 10/09/2017 20:12

To the posters responding the second hand mattresses are 'grim' do you not sleep in hotels? Never stay over a friends house?

I've lived in furnished rentals and stayed in uni halls. By the time those mattresses got to me they'd had countless people sleeping and shagging on them. I've survived.

OP - I think the issue isn't the mattress more the fact that you feel your husband doesn't listen to your wishes? Does he normally always get his way despite it being the stupidly option like it is in this case?

MatildaTheCat · 10/09/2017 20:43

Everything about this plan is silly. I would order a new bed and mattress and inform him the second hand mattress, which will NOT fit, is no longer required.

And mutter darkly abut bout bed bugs which can seriously ruin your life.

BahHumbygge · 10/09/2017 21:12

I have a second hand mattress, in that it belonged to the previous people we bought the house from. I factored that if the mattress had bed bugs, the room would too... we were buying a "second hand" house as much as a bed. No way would I bring a second hand mattress into the house, far too high risk. And I'm a hardcore eco-type who hates buying new consumer goods unnecessarily.

Original poster

itsalwaysworkedbefore · 10/09/2017 21:22

Thanks, everyone. I wouldn't mind so much if I hadn't said many times that I wanted a new mattress plus the fact that it won't even fit on the frame. When I was younger I had to have second hand as I didn't have much money and I appreciate that many people can't afford new furniture.
However, I am older now and anything I buy I want to last and not need replacing. Anyway, my husband will be away for a couple of weeks soon so the mattress will be going as will the bed frame, He will not even notice and I will not care if he does. I should know by now to not tell him about anything and just do what I want to do. In future he will be on a need to know basis only.

OP posts:

PoppyPopcorn · 10/09/2017 22:10

I'm a charity shop volunteer and we wouldn't sell used mattresses in our shop. We don't sellsecond hand duvets or pillows either - only brand new ones still in their wrapping. We will sell used duvet covers/sheets, but they are easier to launder.

If you do get a mattress and decide you don't want it PLEASE check with the shop first and don't just dump it on them. Waste disposal costs a fortune.

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