to think he could have stayed at home?

[gentlydoesit89]

DS sees his dad every fortnight for the weekend. He's 5 and he's started to get upset at having to go each time but always comes home having had a nice time.

I've just arranged to pick him up later today only to be told by ex that it'll be his mother in law dropping DS off as he's in Amsterdam this weekend on a stag do.

Now his new in laws are lovely and I actually feel more confident he'll have had a great time with them this weekend, but AIBU to think that if he'd mentioned this sooner (like when the stag was planned) my son could have stayed at home this week?

I just feel confused that someone seeing him so little as it is wouldn't want to facilitate a switch in weekends instead of just not seeing him at all I suppose. That said I know it's his weekend so he can choose to do what he likes- I just don't understand the thought process behind it!

Hang on, so your son is staying with his dad's new in laws rather than his dad for his weekend?

So they're his step grandparents?

Well it's his choice, I guess. Shame though.

So he's stayed with the dads in laws this weekend??
How long have they been together?

Keep him at home. .

I would ask him in future to let you know if he is not going to be there so either a weekend swap can be arranged or you can keep DS with you. Your sons contact time is to spend time with his Dad not step grandparents. If he has step grandparents why did he spend time with them and not his step mum?

I completely agree that he should have told you about his trip so your DS could have stayed with you / swapped weekends around etc.

However, im guessing dad thinks it's his time and his decision who he leaves DS with - like when it's your time, if you leave DS with your step parents / parents etc.

He probably didn't want to ask to swap - as he then would "owe" you a swap or a favour - my ex has left DC with other people while he was on holiday and I had no idea.

I'm not saying it's right btw because I would be annoyed too ... but I have been in this situation too with a 5 year old - and I was told that I wa seeing unreasonable expecting father to spend all his weekend with our DC on his contact time :-(

If the RP sent the kids to their in laws on their weekend no one would bat an eyelid.

I'd be annoyed too but when it's his 'weekend' he can make his own plans

If the RP sent the kids to their in laws on their weekend no one would bat an eyelid.

Because the RP doesn't have to fit all their bonding into one weekend a fortnight. And one weekend out for the RP doesn't mean they see their child once that month...