To be so annoyed for DB?

[MatildaTheCat]

Actually, yes, I guess I am but still, here goes:

DB is married to a great woman from another country. There are very different culturally is certain ways. They live in the UK. Each summer DSIL takes the DC to visit and stays with her DM.

Now, they are just home and I noticed with great surprise that DN aged 10 has had her ears pierced. I remarked on it and dsil looked tense and said her DM had taken DN out for the day and had it done without consulting either parent. They had, in fact, agreed she could have then done at 14 if she wanted to. DN has never shown any interest in having her ears pierced or any other 'girly' stuff.

I asked dsil what my db had said and she just said he'd had to accept it had been done and couldn't be undone. I genuinely don't think dsil had any idea, her DM just took it upon herself. I think she's pretty upset about it but clearly didn't say much.

So, totally none of my business but I'm dumbfounded by this behaviour and furious for them. On a scale of 1-10 just how U was the Mil/dm/GM?

It is outrageous and totally unacceptable for the grandmother to have taken your niece to get her ears pierced without your brother's and SIL's permission. I would be livid if I were them. I certainly hope your brother doesn't allow his MIL to have the children alone in her care ever again. She can't be trusted.

I would be very annoyed if I was your brother.

The grandmother had no right to do this as Im sure your SIL knows.

Well, it can be undone really. If everyone (inc. the girl) does not want them then take them out so the holes heal up.

It can be undone.it would be very wrong to ignore his feelings.
And i'd not trust that adult again with the care of my child because of it. Some may disagree but it sounds as though the child was hardly keen and the wishes of the parent.

Can they not just take the earrings out? Simple.

Meh. Unreasonable, yes, but it's really not something I could get worked up about, certainly not about other people's kids. Is it any of your business?

Of course it can be undone. I used to have holes in my ears. Now I don't. Honest.

I think this is one for the parents.
Gran was way out of order by what she done. But the pàrents need to decide on what to do.They can take the earrings out and let the holes close.
You just have to be supportive whatever they choose.