My Y8 DS playing with Y7 kids

[talllikejerryhall]

Last year my son started secondary school, and the results were mixed, with some kids in his class picking on him, leading us to decision to change his form class.

Now he's started Y8 and he's told me how he's missed his lunch twice because he was playing with Y7 kids.

I am worried about this as he had problems establishing a friendship group last year, and I don't want him labelled as the kid has no friends in his year so has to hang out with the younger ones. But I don't know if I am being overly harsh on thinking this.

He is less mature than most 12 year olds and he is super tall, so it's a tricky combination of looking older and acting younger, which draws negative attention to him.

AIBU to tell him not to hang out with Y7s, and stick to his year group?

I just want him to have a nice year and make some good friends, but don't know what I can do to help this, or whether I just need to butt out and let him figure it out?

Tricky. It seems to indicate he does not get on with anyone in his own year, and I would have a quiet word with the tutor, to ask him/her to keep an eye out and see what the in class dynamics are like.

My best friend all through secondary school was in the year below me. I had a loose group of friends in my year but nobody really close until she joined.

Nobody ever thought we were weird, including our parents.

That's pretty much all I want, for him to find a nice kid to be friends with. Sounds simple, but somehow hasn't been straightforward.

Is he playing football with them? Maybe its a mix of year 7 and 8. But I too would be worried and speak to his form tutor.

Loads of kids have friends a year or two older / younger and the difference in age between the youngest Y8s and the oldest Y7s will can be a matter of a few days. Be happy that he has friends and don't worry about them being younger. You can't mould his friendships now; he's not a toddler.